Chapter 28
Emmeric
When Zane and Talon returned, Emmeric felt like he was able to finally exhale a breath he’d been holding for several hours.
“You found them? They’re okay?” he asked as he hugged his best friend.
“They’re fine. Scuti took them to the border of Nyr. They say hello and want me to tell you to be careful.”
Emmeric chuckled, missing Talon’s parents with a fierceness that surprised him, then sobered. “Can we trust Scuti?”
“I don’t trust anybody,” Iyana chimed in from where she sat on the floor. Her back was leaning up against the wall, her arms crossed across her chest, her eyes closed. Emmeric had honestly thought she was asleep. “But I’m happy to hear your parents are okay, Tal.”
Emmeric guided Talon away from her with a hand on his shoulder. “Do you think we can trust him?”
Tal ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “I don’t know. It seems like he’s telling the truth about Rigil killing his astalle. He told us that he plans on helping the stars to be banished and then killing himself so he can be with her again.”
“Shit.”
“Yeah, it was heavy stuff. He sounded really sincere, though. And I’m pretty sure he actually took my parents to Nyr.” Talon frowned. “Though they could be in a dungeon somewhere right now and I wouldn’t know. But my gut is telling me they’re safe.”
Emmeric nodded. He had been thinking the same thing. Scuti seemed much more forthright than Altair ever had. So either he was much better at hiding his true intentions or he was an unlikely ally.
Hopefully, once they left Athusia, they wouldn’t require the assistance of any stars at all. Hopefully the Istorian queen would offer them her army so that Nyr would part with theirs. Hopefully they would figure out how to banish the stars again.
If Emmeric was being honest with himself, they were basing most of their plans on hope. It didn’t exactly instill him, or anyone, with confidence for their future. Odds were they would all die.
His gaze stuck on Iyana again—this time she was actually dozing against the wall.
Emmeric would do everything in his power to keep her alive, to make sure she got through this intact.
Because while she was confronting Altair, he’d heard something that gave him some sort of stupid hope for the future.
She had told Altair, “When you made the decision to steal my magic that day in the Dead Lands, you broke us. I can’t be with you.”
But Emmeric had heard her thought right after she made that statement.
Not when I have Emmeric.
It had been quiet, and brief, but he heard her think it. His entire brain seemed to shut down, and he looked at her with his eyes wide. Not only because he’d actually heard her thoughts, but because of what she’d been thinking.
Emmeric was utterly and completely hers.
There would be no denying her after this.
Emmeric had to hold back at the time to keep himself from crushing her against the wall and kissing her again.
He missed the feel of her lips, the taste of her tongue.
He was desperate to have her underneath him.
But he had meant it when he said he wouldn’t fuck her until she wanted all of him. It was only fair to himself.
He’d never had a broken heart before. He was always the one to use women and leave them. Emmeric knew, though, that if he gave her the chance, Iyana was capable of completely eviscerating him.
Still…
Not when I have Emmeric.
His heart swelled and his stomach swooped every time he replayed those words in his mind.
It was something they would need to discuss, but not right then.
He was exhausted, and they’d be sneaking back out of Athusia in the morning to begin their trek to Istoria.
Emmeric sat down, and sleep took him under immediately.
The next day, Emmeric opened his mouth no less than three times to talk to Iyana about what he’d overheard, and each time he closed it again without uttering a word.
It didn’t help that they still shared a horse.
His arms were around her waist, her ass was pressed into his crotch, and her smoky lavender and coconut scent wafted into his nose. It was enough to drive a man insane.
In the end, he decided to simply test a theory.
Mouse.
She jumped so hard, Emmeric had to wrap an arm around her middle to keep her from falling off of the horse. Iyana’s head whipped around, and she stared at him with wide eyes, fear seeping from her pores.
“What the fuck was that?”
In hindsight, that wasn’t Emmeric’s best idea.
“I’m sorry, I—” Emmeric floundered for words.
He hadn’t expected her to be so spooked.
“I only wanted to see if you could hear me. When you were talking to Altair, I could hear some of what you were thinking…” He trailed off.
Iyana’s gaze was searching his face, and abject terror roiled through their bond.
“Let me down,” she said suddenly.
“Iyana, I’m sorry, can we talk about—”
“Let me down!” Iyana started to swing her leg over the side of the horse, so Emmeric had no choice but to stop and let her clamber off.
The others had reined in their horses as well, looking over with confused expressions. Iyana appeared to be shaking as she jumped into the snow and stalked over to the horse Talon and Kaz were riding.
“We need to change. I’m riding with Talon.”
Kaz glanced between her and Emmeric, a furrow in her brow. “Okay, sure.”
Emmeric’s heart squeezed in his chest. He really couldn’t understand what was happening.
They had been doing so well together. Iyana had been trusting him, seeking him out during her weaker moments.
And now, all of what they’d built seemed to be dissolving.
They shared emotions and pictures—how was this any different?
He could only watch as she climbed onto the saddle in front of Talon. Emmeric didn’t even move as Kaz sat in front of him; he still only had eyes for Iyana. He walked the horse closer and opened his mouth to apologize, or ask for an explanation, but she held up her hand.
“I can’t talk about this right now.” Iyana turned slightly to address Talon. “Please, let’s just go.”
Tal glanced at him, and Emmeric gave a slight nod of his head.
But the benefit of having been friends for so long, Emmeric knew that Talon would get to the bottom of what was happening and fill him in.
As the woman he loved and his best friend walked away from him, Emmeric felt Iyana put up her fire barrier, cutting him off from her completely.
Iyana
She couldn’t even look at Emmeric. Iyana made sure her barrier was fully intact, with no holes. She didn’t want a single drop of her emotions to escape.
It didn’t stop Emmeric’s hurt from filtering through to her, though.
Talon nudged their horse into a trot to put some distance between them and the others.
“Alright, Smalls, what was that about?”
Iyana shook her head. “It was hard for me at first to accept this bond between Emmeric and I, and the fact that I could sense his emotions and pain made it even harder. I’ve spent most of my life having to be strong for those around me, and someone being able to see through me was scary.
But once I got used to it, it brought a bit of comfort knowing I always had somebody.
Knowing he’d always be in my corner. And after”—she swallowed hard—“after Altair…I knew I could trust Emmeric because I could feel him. I would know if he was ever going to deceive me, because he literally couldn’t hide from me. ”
“I understand,” Talon said softly.
“Sharing pictures, though, and dreams or nightmares seemed so much more intimate. I also didn’t want to share those images with him. I didn’t want him to know how much I was struggling with the memories, and to know that they were flowing to him without my knowledge was really embarrassing.”
“He knew, Iyana. We all knew.”
She sighed. “I understand that now. But it doesn’t change the fact that I didn’t want to put that on my friends, you know?”
“I think I know more than most, Smalls.”
Her heart broke anew for her friend. Talon had been through more than she ever had, and guilt overran her. It seemed to Iyana that her problems were small compared to his—he had literally died to save his best friend’s life, whereas she had been stupid and put her trust in the wrong person.
Iyana placed a comforting hand on his arm. “Tal, I’m so sorry. Have you talked to Zane at all?”
“Oh no you don’t. You’re not going to turn this around on me. We’re talking about your shit right now.”
She huffed out a breath. “Fine. I don’t know, Tal.
Just now, I heard Emmeric’s voice in my head.
He said ‘Mouse.’” Iyana shivered. “It feels more…intrusive, I guess. It’s too reminiscent of having the stars in my head after Imothia was first attacked.
And now it’s making me think of all those times that it seemed as though Altair was reading my mind…
maybe he actually was. He kept reassuring me that he wasn’t in my head, but he lied about so many other things that could have been a lie, too. ”
“You know Emmeric isn’t like Altair. You just said so yourself. And if he ever did anything so stupid, I’d kick his ass myself for screwing things up with you.”
Iyana chuckled. “Thanks, Tal.” She frowned again. “It’s just a lot.”
“I get it. You know,” he said hesitantly, “this may be a good thing.”
“You give somebody unlimited access to your thoughts and tell me that again.”
“Fair, but hear me out.”
Iyana grumbled, but allowed him to continue.
“There are so many times in a battle that I wished I could have others simply know what I was thinking and follow suit. If you could learn to control it so that you only use it to communicate when you want to, it could be a huge advantage.”
Iyana pursed her lips and said nothing.
“Come on, Smalls, you know I’m right.”
When she continued her silence, Talon began prodding her in her ribs until she giggled and slapped his hand away.
“Tickling isn’t fair.”
“Well then, admit that I’m right.” Tal placed a finger menacingly against her side without any pressure.
“Okay, fine! You’re right, there could be an advantage.”
His finger retreated.
“But what if we can’t control it?”
“You two have been working extremely well together lately. I think if you focused, you’re capable of anything together.”
They rode the rest of the day in silence. When they stopped for the night, Talon and Emmeric snuck off to hunt for their dinner. Iyana realized that Talon had divulged their conversation when the whisper of a hand stroked against her fire barrier in apology.
Iyana’s resolve wavered. While Talon did have a point, it terrified her to give anyone that kind of access to her inner self.
She’d already given so much of herself to Altair, only for him to rip her heart to shreds.
Realistically, she understood Emmeric was different and that he was incapable of that level of deceit.
Still, she needed time to come to terms with this new aspect of their bond, so she kept her barrier in place and distanced herself from her Kanaliza.
The next few days were about the same—Iyana continued to ride with Talon and ignore Emmeric as much as possible.
She blocked him out so that he couldn’t hear her thoughts, but Iyana could feel his hurt deepening the longer it went on.
It wasn’t something she could do forever; it took too much energy to maintain, and it slipped while she was asleep, anyway.
First thing in the morning, she wrapped the fire around herself again.
Slowly, she let it thin out so that Emmeric could sense her emotions again. His relief was palpable when Iyana finally let the barrier drop completely after five days.
“We’ll work on it,” he promised her, his blue eyes earnest.
And they did. As the weather warmed the further south they traveled, the more control they gained over their bond and their magic.
Soon, they could communicate silently with ease, although some louder thoughts would slip through unbidden.
Iyana would always throw her barrier up again during these times, but they became fewer and farther between.
She became confident enough in their ability to control it that when they decided to stay the night at an inn instead of on the road, Iyana was actually excited to spend some alone time with Emmeric.