CHAPTER FIVE
“Stay for breakfast. I’ll make us a big breakfast.”
Shannon watched as Edmund flung his long legs out of her bed, sat on the edge for a few seconds, and then got his big, muscular, naked body up and went into the ensuite bathroom.
Why did that white man have to be so fine, she thought as she just laid there watching him. She never even wanted a white man. They never turned her on like that ever.
Until she met Edmund.
Until one night with him changed everything. She later found out he only fooled with black ladies and had plenty to choose from. Which kind of hurt her. But before they even got together, he told her what time it was: He was not a one-woman-man and never would be.
Which was her sentiments too. Before they slept together. And before then, although he definitely had a type, she did too. And he wasn’t it.
She was into black and Hispanic guys only.
Nobody else would do. That was why she still couldn’t get over the fact that of all the men that wanted her, she would fall for somebody like him.
And not only that, but she would fall for the one man who told her from jump not to go there.
Who told her he was not going to commit to her ever and that she was never going to change his mind. But she fell for the joker anyway.
She listened as he removed that condom from his penis and then began peeing that long, first of the morning bladder-emptying that made her even more convinced that he was the man for her.
Even listening to him pee wasn’t a turn-off like it was with those other guys.
But she wasn’t the one who needed convincing.
She made up her mind that he was the one two years ago.
But today wasn’t just any old day with Edmund.
Today was her fortieth birthday. And the reality that she no longer had the excuse of youth made her realize just how desperate she needed to find a way to the front of the line and become his wife.
Not his booty call. Not his pretty little piece when he needed a piece. But his wife.
But what was it going to take when the only time she saw him was in bed? When the only time they spent any quality time together was never? Two years in and she was no closer to the front of that line than the first day she met him. Damn, she thought. How in the world did she let that happen?
“Did you hear me?”
He was back in the bedroom and putting on his clothes.
“Edmund?”
“I heard you, Shannon. I heard you the first time.”
She pulled the covers down to her waist and sat up in bed.
With her hands wrapped around the bottom of her legs and with her dark-brown breasts exposed, she was willing to use every tool she had.
“Why don’t you stay for breakfast for a change?
I can make us some waffles and eggs or anything else you want me to make.
I’m a very good cook you know.” She smiled a smile he didn’t return.
A smile many men already told her they would cherish if she’d only let them.
Why her ass had to want this particular man?
“We can sit out on the terrace and have coffee. Take it easy for a change.”
He pulled his pants up and sat in her wingback chair to put on his socks and shoes.
“What do you say?”
“I say no,” he said in his usual blunt way.
“Why not, Edmund? Just for a change?”
“I don’t need a change.”
When he said those words, it did something to Shannon.
She flung her long, dark-weaved hair backwards and gave him a harsh stare.
It was always all about what he wanted and needed.
Never what she wanted or needed. And she was tired of it.
“I’m the one who needs a change,” she said. “How about that?”
He looked at her. He wasn’t accustomed to her using that tone with him.
“Today is my birthday, Edmund, and I need a change. What do you say about that?”
He continued to put on his footwear.
She was amazed by his lack of response. “You can’t even wish me a happy birthday?”
“That’s not why you brought it up.”
“Oh yeah? Why did I bring it up since you’re this expert on me?”
“You brought it up as a cudgel. You’re forty and therefore I’m expected to set my time by your biological clock.” He looked his hard blue eyes at her. “I’m not doing that.”
“We need to make a decision, Edmund.”
“No. You need to make a decision. I told you two years ago that I’m not committing to you or anybody else.
Our relationship will be exactly what it was two years ago and exactly what it will be two years from now if we choose to continue.
It is what it is and it will always be what it is.
I told you that two years ago, Shannon. If it no longer works for you, then just say so and I’m out.
” Edmund gave her a hard look. “But I’m out for good. ”
And that was when he always got her and all his other ladies and Shannon knew it. If she told him to get out of her life, he was going to stay out. She would no longer be on the list, let alone at the head of the list! And he knew it.
She looked at that man as he made his way to the nightstand. Again she wondered why did he have to be so fine? And the older he got, the better he looked to her. Which only made it worse. Because she knew, deep down, just as she knew he knew, she wasn’t giving that up.
“Why do I put up with your ass?” she asked him.
“You don’t put up with my ass,” he said as he put his phone and keys and change back in his pockets. “You put up with my dick.”
They looked at each other. For Edmund, he was just telling the naked truth. For Shannon, she hated herself for loving a selfish, egotistical, uncaring man like him. But she knew it was the naked truth too.
That was why, when he turned to leave, she couldn’t resist. “When will you be back?”
He glanced back at her, but didn’t stop walking. “I’ll call you,” he said.
Which, she knew, meant he’d be back when he got the urge to come back because that was how he rolled and that was how she let him roll. That was the naked truth too.
And he left.