Chapter 33
The silence in this truck is deafening. Every time I look over at Avery, I’m silently begging for her to say something, but she hasn’t looked away from her window in five minutes. My phone rests in her hand, untouched.
I didn’t even hesitate when I told her my passcode. It’s become ingrained in my brain after years of punching in the same numbers. I’m not sure why I didn’t think to tap it in myself, but when she asked, the numbers just fell off my tongue so easily, there was no stopping it.
We’re about three minutes away from Tamara’s place, and I’m desperate to change the mood in here. We can’t leave things like this. Not after all the progress we’ve made. There’s only one thing I can think to do.
We approach a red light, and once I’m fully stopped, I reach over and grab my phone from her hand. This move finally gains her attention. She turns her head slightly and I click on one of my playlists from high school.
“Chandelier” by Sia starts playing through my truck speakers.
The light turns green, but I don’t miss the slightest crack of a smile on Avery’s lips before letting my foot off the brake.
She still doesn’t say a word, but when the chorus approaches, and I belt out the words and attempt to hit the high note, I hear her laugh. Finally.
She joins in, and we spend the rest of our drive singing—horribly, but still singing—a song from one of my favorite memories. Luckily it’s late and doesn’t take long for me to find a parking spot on the street. I put the car in Park and turn toward her.
“Man, that song brings back some memories.”
Avery grabs her bag from the floor and puts it in her lap. She looks my way and she’s wearing that dimpled smile I love so much. “God, do you remember how drunk Luke was at that party?”
We didn’t drink much in high school, but we were still kids. We did some dumb shit sometimes. It was after we won Nationals my senior year, we were all celebrating at one of my teammates’ houses who lived off campus.
“I can’t believe he convinced us to stand on that table and sing that song with him.” I shake my head at the thought.
We’re both chuckling now, remembering a time that wasn’t so complicated.
Honestly, whatever is going on between us, fake marriage or not, it doesn’t feel complicated to me.
I know it’s not the same for her. She just got out of a horrible marriage and is trying to get her life back on track.
But I can’t help but want to be a part of that life. And I don’t want it to be fake either.
Before I left for Sweden, when we were at my apartment, it was different.
It wasn’t messy or full of the animosity we’ve been holding onto.
It was familiar. It was easy. I know she felt it, too.
At one point during the movie, she even leaned her shoulder into mine, and I was so close to wrapping my arm around her.
Hell, maybe this is a little complicated.
If it were any other woman, I would have pulled her into me.
But if life is giving me a second chance with Avery, I need to do this right.
Which means, I’m eventually going to have to tell her the truth about what happened two years ago.
I can’t hide the real reason I cut her and everyone off if I want to build something real here. I just don’t know how to tell her.
“Thanks for the ride.” Avery reaches for the handle of her door but hesitates.
It’s the opening I need to make this night last a little longer.
“Do you want to go for a drive with me?”
There’s a spot on the outskirts of town I discovered that has little to no light pollution. It’s the perfect spot to look at the stars.
“Rain check? It’s been a long day.”
Disappointment settles heavy in my gut, but I push it away. Now is not the time to be selfish. If she’s had a long day, I can be patient.
I’ve waited ten years, what’s another few days?
“Right. Of course. Let me walk you to your door.”
“Connor, you don’t have to—”
I turn in my seat, glaring at her like I do my opponents on the ice.
She slams her mouth shut, and I take that as my cue.
Rounding the front of the truck, I reach her door just as she’s opening it.
When I offer my hand, she doesn’t hesitate.
It might go unnoticed by others, but I don’t miss it.
Her hand finds mine on instinct and it fits there just like it always has. Snug and perfect.
When she steps down out of my truck, I keep my fingers laced with hers and walk her to the entrance of her apartment building.
There’s no concierge or anyone to greet us when we walk in, and I scan the lobby to get a feel for the place.
It’s a nice place but I don’t like the lack of security.
Anyone can just walk in here and no one would blink an eye.
“Stop.”
Avery’s voice pulls me from my thoughts.
“Stop what?”
She finally lets go of my hand and pins me with a look. “Stop thinking whatever you’re thinking. This is a nice place and she’s letting me stay for free.”
Fucking money. I get why it’s so important to her.
That fuckface ex of hers probably made her sign a prenup, and she said he called her a gold digger.
That, on top of the medical bills, it makes sense.
It doesn’t mean I have to like knowing she’s hurting for cash.
Especially when I have some I’d be more than willing to hand over to her if she asked.
“I didn’t say a word.”
Avery shakes her head. “You didn’t have to. I know you.”
That’s an understatement. No one knows me better than her. I’m about to say as much when a third voice joins our conversation.
“Well, well, well. Connor Smith, as I live and breathe.”
Tamara’s voice causes both Avery and me to smile. When I turn to greet her, her arms are already open for a hug.
Wrapping my arms around her muscular frame, I scoop her up into a bear hug. Once I set her back down on her feet, I keep my hands on her shoulders.
“Tamara Edwards. It’s been far too long. And you live in my city? I’m going to pretend it doesn’t hurt my ego that you’ve never come to a game.” I go to boop her nose, and she swats my hand away.
“Yeah, well, whose fault is that? I seem to remember you were the one who fell off the face of the earth a couple years ago. And I’ve been to plenty of games, you just had no idea.”
Well, damn. She’s got me there. Tamara has always been blunt and outspoken. Her and Avery are similar in that way. I’ve got to respect her calling me out right now.
“You’re right. I’m an asshole. And I’ve been worse off ever since.” The truth I spill causes Tamara to side-eye her best friend. When she looks back at me, she’s wearing a devilish smirk. This should be good.
“I forgive you. My heart broke a little bit too, when this one got engaged. I just didn’t run away like you.”
Well, shit. Leave it to Tamara to let the cat out of the bag.
I’m rubbing my face, trying to hide my laugh, when Avery grabs her best friend by the arm.
“Excuse her, she gets delirious after a long day of work. She doesn’t know what she’s saying.”
Tamara goes to argue, and I watch Avery scrunch her eyebrows and shoot daggers at her. Tamara pretends not to notice and turns back to me. “So, are you going to take care of my girl while I’m gone?”
Gone? Where the hell is she going?
She must read the confusion on my face because she turns to Avery with a hand on her hip. “You still haven’t asked him? Avery Chamberlin, if I didn’t love you so much, I’d smack the back of your head right now.”
“Whoa. No need to do that. Someone want to fill me in?” I look between the girls and watch Tamara raise an eyebrow at her best friend.
Avery groans, leaning her head back to look at the ceiling before dropping it back down. “Ugh, fine. Tamara needs to fly overseas for a week or two for work. There’s a few athletes she wants to meet with. Niko’s family is in town still and I was wondering—”
“Yes,” I agree to her staying with me before she can even ask.
The reality of what I just offered doesn’t hit me until I’ve agreed. I wouldn’t just be helping Avery out, she’d be in my space, sleeping in my apartment, existing in the most private parts of my life that I’ve never shared with anyone else before.
She’ll be there when I go to sleep, maybe in my kitchen when she wakes up in the morning. The possibility of sharing something so personal with her makes my pulse quicken.
This is my chance.
Tamara snorts next to me, but I keep my eyes on Avery. “Told you, A,” she says to Avery.
“Are you sure?” Avery asks, concern etching her brows.
“I am absolutely sure you can stay with me while Tamara is gone. I have plenty of room.”
Avery nods, but we don’t say another word. I can feel Tamara’s attention on us but don’t break eye contact. She grabs Avery by the arm.
“Thanks, Connor. She’ll call you tomorrow with details. Now, say good night and stop staring at each other like that.”
We both smile and utter, “Good night.”
Tamara pulls Avery to the elevator, but I don’t move. Once they’re inside, I wave to them both and watch the doors close before turning around and making my way back out to my truck.
The entire drive home I replay what Tamara said.
I did run away when Avery got engaged. The entire time we remained in each other’s lives, I watched from the outside, thinking it was enough to watch her live out her dreams as a spectator.
It wasn’t until she got that ring on her finger that I realized I made the biggest mistake of my life.
Maybe we could’ve made it work living in separate states, but it was too late for that.
She had figured that out with someone else, and it hurt too much to stick around.
But now she’s here. There’s no ring—well, not a real one at least. But there is a marriage. It may be fake but it’s ours for now.
Now she’s going to be staying with me, and I’m going to make damn sure I use my time wisely.
Life has given me a second chance and there’s no way in hell I’m fucking this one up.
I need to get Avery back.
Mack Attack
Get her back? When did you have her?
Fuck. I meant to send that just to Niko. I’ve made a huge mistake.
Jefferson
OH MY GOD. Mr. I’m Going to be Alone Forever used to date Avery? I need details.
I tap out of the group chat and pull up my thread with Niko.
I meant to send that here.
Niko
I figured. But I’m with Jefferson. I’m going to need some details.
Your girlfriend hasn’t given you any?
Niko
Girl code, man. They don’t gossip as much as us. At least not with me.
Can I come over for breakfast? I’ll fill you in.
Niko
See you at nine.
My phone continues to vibrate wildly in my hand, Mack and Jefferson not at all pleased that I’m ignoring them. I swipe down on my phone to flip it to silent when I see one last text come through.
Jefferson
You’re going to pay for this.
Chuckling, I set my phone down on my nightstand, knowing all too well that I’m in for some trouble the next time I see them.