Chapter 15 #3
Eventually, Michael slowly pulled back, resting his forehead on her own. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?” he whispered.
“Not bad at all.” Her eyes slowly opened.
He must’ve picked her up at some point, because he now gently set her feet back on the ground. “See? I told you. We’re good together. Now, will you please let us see where this goes?”
With his question, and her hiking boots firmly back on planet Earth, an avalanche of all the reasons she shouldn’t have done this hit her again. And he must’ve seen it, because he grabbed her hand.
“Don’t do it, Dani.”
“What?” Her voice was breathless and weird.
“Don’t push me away.”
“I told you. I’ll hurt you. I can’t—”
“What are you talking about?”
“I don’t want to lose you too.” She pushed harder and broke away. A cold wind blew, chaffing her cheeks where tears had escaped and scoured her cheeks. She was running, yes, and she didn’t care where.
“Dani!” Michael caught up to her. He spun her around, held both of her hands to his chest. “You’re not going to lose me. Just stop running.”
“But I can’t. Don’t you see? At some point, I will hurt you. I don’t mean to, but I will mess this up like everything else I’ve done. And I can’t do it. I can’t put you through that.”
“What did you mess up? Who did you hurt?”
“Take your pick! My dad—he lost his job because of me. And it almost broke us.”
The confusion in Michael’s eyes cleared. He was finally getting it.
“Dani.” He held her. “That’s why you ran away, isn’t it? When you were a kid.”
“I didn’t want to hurt anyone else.”
“And instead, you climbed up to the back porch roof.”
“Where you found me. And caught me when I fell off the trellis with my suitcase. You broke your arm because of me.”
“Back then, my mom always joked that I was your guardian angel. I think she knew.” His sad smile faded into a serious expression. “But none of what happened to your dad was your fault. I remember my parents talking about it. He lost his job because he had a gambling problem.”
“What? How did I not know this?”
Michael shrugged. “You were young. And you know how private your father is. Your mom shared it with my mom, and I only know because I happened to overhear my parents talking about it.”
Gambling? Alton Kim?
She tried to grasp the new knowledge. “Even if that’s true, my father was right. I still mess up so much. I don’t think and rush in—”
“Yeah, and your quick reactions have saved lives. Literally. Like Maria’s. And I bet it’s an asset at your job.”
“Even there, I completely failed on my first op. I took down the wrong guy.”
“Was he innocent?”
“Well, no. He was a part of the organization we were investigating.” Was that why she hadn’t been formally reprimanded?
She shook away the question. “But the point is, I followed my gut instead of following an order. That’s why I’m in Renegade and not Miami.”
Michael scrunched up his lips like he was thinking. “I’m not seeing the problem there. I think that’s worked out in our favor.”
“Then ask the high school small group about when I burned down our tent on our camping trip. Or my last boyfriend. He broke up with me by text after I threw him a surprise party, because he said life with me was too complicated and messy. Complicated. Messy. His exact words.”
“All because you threw him a surprise party?”
“Turns out I shouldn’t have invited both his sister and cousin, because they’re mortal enemies. They got into a fist fight at the punch bowl, and we were kicked out of the venue.”
Michael cracked a smile. “His loss. My gain.”
“I’m serious! I mess up people’s lives. Cause chaos.”
“So he wasn’t into MMA fighting. You’re better off without him.”
“I mean it, Mike. He was a really good guy, and I flubbed it all up. I don’t want to do that to you. You were already run off the road because of my other ex-boyfriend. Who knows what will happen if you stay with me?”
“Hey.” He tilted her face up to meet his. “Your father was wrong.” He kissed her right cheek. “Your small group probably learned a valuable lesson.” He kissed her left cheek. “We survived Colter’s road rage. And your last boyfriend was an idiot, and I’m grateful for it.” He kissed her lips.
“You’re nuts, is what you are.”
He laughed and kissed her hand. His voice dropped, and he wiped the tears off her cheeks.
“Dani, I think I need your kind of chaos in my life. You said it yourself. I need to get out of the office. I need to live more. Remember that there’s more to life than solving cases.
You’re the perfect person to help me do that.
You’re strong and hilarious and beautiful.
I want to make this work. Please. At least think about it. ”
And how could she argue with that?
She blew out a long sigh. She couldn’t say no to those big brown eyes. “You really think we can do this?”
“Yeah. I do. I at least want to give it a shot.” He held out his hand, which she took.
But she knew this man. Michael Martinelli did nothing halfway. He would be all in. And she had to be realistic. If she botched this, neither one of them would be getting away unscathed, because like it or not, her heart was already invested.