Chapter 8 Serafina
SERAFINA
“Too tight, Madre. I’m basically down the road.”
She unwillingly releases me, resting her hands on my shoulders. “Il tesoro, anywhere that isn’t home is too far away. What will I do, not having you here each day?”
“Breathe easier. Not have to run a marathon to find me,” I joke, earning a dismayed look.
“If anything, I’ll be breathing a whole lot harder in concern.”
While moving away and attending school is exciting, something I’ve been looking forward to every day for the past two weeks, I wasn’t anticipating this part—going from seeing Madre every day to weeks, maybe even months, apart.
I ensured most of my nights this past week were spent at home, much to Alessio’s annoyance.
He’s about to get a lot of time with me at school, whereas my relationship with Madre will be forever changed, so he can deal with it.
My entire life has been Madre. Zeno pops in a lot, as does Nero, but for the most part, it’s only us.
Now, that’s over. Every shopping trip, every time I came in two minutes past curfew and she’d bitch, all the nights we’d stay up late munching on cookies and watching old telenovela reruns—life is changing for us both.
“You sure you don’t want to come with us?” Madre turned down the offer to see me off at my dorm. While I wouldn’t oppose her tagging along, I’m pleased my goodbye will be done here, in my childhood home, with few people watching. It’s more private this way—more us.
She throws a faint smile towards Zeno. “This is something you and your brother need to do alone.”
In other words: she doesn’t want to play referee.
“Besides,” a deep voice booms, cutting through the sullen mood, “I was promised fresh bread. Gabriella, if you go with them, I’ll starve.”
Nero presses a kiss to her cheek and winks at me, because we both know what he’s doing. Him remaining behind is to distract Madre, letting her do what she loves most: cook for others.
Once she’s mollified, he brings me in for one of his tight hugs and refuses to let go until my hand taps out against his shoulder.
With a playful grin, he bops me on the nose.
“Good luck, mini-Mancini. If anyone bothers you, give ’em hell.
If you need anyone killed, call me. Day or night, you know I’ll come. ”
Madre throws a scandalized glare his way, which makes us both chuckle. He’s joking…but also not. While I’ve never seen Nero in action, he’s as deadly as Zeno.
As Zeno’s best friend, Nero was there for everything surrounding his padre’s death and the war with Ursin Volkov.
He’s the only one to visit us, other than Zeno’s Captain, Elio, one of the few who knows we’re out here.
He’s basically my second brother, except cooler.
When I was twelve, I believed myself to have a crush on him because he’s older, hotter, full of angst. What twelve-year-old wouldn’t fall madly in love?
It lasted a week until I realized he’s a second version of Zeno, and my crush didn’t involve romantic feelings.
“Thanks, Nero. You’ll be my first call.”
Zeno scowls too, slipping between us to steer me away. “There will be no killing required. You’ll have someone with you at all times. But I do agree with giving hell to anyone who pisses you off.”
“Z, only you could chide us for something and then make the same joke about it.”
“Ignore him,” Nero mutters in my ear, catching up to us. “You know I’ll come, no matter who’s assigned as your protection. Also, is there a reason you look so tired? The dark marks beneath your eyes will certainly keep all the boys away, making my life infinitely easier.”
Scowling, I shove into his bicep and roll my eyes, all without answering him—without admitting the dreams that slip in occasionally.
Not every night, but certainly more than once since the day Ivan Volkov kidnapped me.
Always the same one, too—always with his face, his gross laugh, while I’m tied to the chair.
And then, it goes dark, leaving me to question if I live or die until wrenched from sleep.
After a final wave to Nero and Madre, Zeno and I get into his car, which has been loaded with my multiple suitcases of everything I’m taking to school.
Zeno drives off, and in the side mirrors, I watch my family get smaller and smaller. The house eventually fades, and then we turn out of view entirely.
Zeno makes small talk during the trip, but his mind is clearly elsewhere. It leaves a lot of room for my own thoughts.
Many of my group chats have been going off on my phone all day, but I haven’t responded to anything. At this point, I may delete them. Hardly anyone I attended school with is going to the same university, and those who are aren’t people I regularly hung out with.
Besides Amara. She too has been messaging on and off, seeing as she’s moving in today as well, though to a different building on campus.
University will be my fresh start, to be who I’d prefer to be and not the girl I’ve been feigning.
While I love my friends and spending time with them, there is such a thing as being too social, and that was the life I led.
In my determination to ensure Zeno and Madre felt they made the correct choices, that I wouldn’t burden them by being around, I focused on getting accepted into the “right” social groups and doing all the corresponding activities—events, parties—while also maintaining consistently high grades.
It was exhausting, and not the true me.
I’m warm cookies, curled on the couch, watching reality shows kind of person. My socializing could come from the internet, and it’d be fine. Not that I’m opposed to having a social life in university too, but maybe one where I’m not trying so hard. Without Madre and Zeno around, it’s possible.
Which is why, when my phone vibrates again, I’m thirty seconds away from switching the notifications off.
At the same time, Zeno’s phone lights up with a text, Lev’s name flashing across the screen. He briefly reads the message before summarizing, “He’s at the dorm.”
“Wonderful.”
His lips pinch. “You asked for him, Sera. The Bratva pulled a lot of shit to make this happen, so be nice.”
Yet again, I’m a liability to others. Why was I stubborn?
Shaking the thought off, I shoot back, “He’s not the issue.
” Ever since our talk, my mood flip-flops between acceptance and understanding and annoyance.
Today, on move-in day, I’m not annoyed per se, but…
weirded out. Almost like I should be more annoyed by the prospect of a personal stalker and that’s what is confusing to my mood.
Zeno grabs his phone and taps the screen a few times before tossing the device into my lap. “That’s his number. Program it in yours as an emergency number, just in case.”
“Seems a bit much.”
“Do it to put my mind at ease.”
“Whatever.” I make a new contact from Lev’s number before handing Zeno back his cell.
Mine buzzes again, reaching the max of my temper, but it’s not one of the numerous group chats. It’s the other important one, who’ll distract me from the fact that, as of this afternoon, I’ll be living with Lev, a virtual stranger. He’ll be reporting my every step, piss, and breath to Zeno.
Tipping the phone until Zeno can’t see my screen and giving him the opportunity to pull his big brother act and annoy me about Alessio, I swipe it awake.
<3
Bad news. I won’t be attending this semester.
Pretty sure, my stomach physically drops to my feet. How can one sentence change so much? I’ve been excited to attend school with him in the place we met. To sit at a table or beneath a tree and snuggle while studying. To camp out in the library and sneak treats to one another.
We’re in different programs and years, so I wasn’t expecting to share classes with him, or even wanted to spend every waking second together…but some of them, sure.
Me
WHY?
<3
There’s shit going on. Stuff I can’t tell you. I hope to come back next semester.
Between him and Zeno, there’s a lot of stuff I’m not getting told.
Me
Vague.
<3
I know. Sorry. I was looking forward to being with you.
Me
Same
<3
I promise we’ll still hang out often. Maybe this weekend, I’ll come take you out.
Me
I’d love that.
“Something wrong?” Zeno’s voice cuts through the fog.
Only that I’ll hardly see my boyfriend. Not that it’ll be any different than what we’ve been doing since February, but it should be different. It’s a bit disappointing.
“Nope.” I force my voice to be perky and not raise suspicion.
Thankfully, he drops the topic when we arrive at my new dorm. It’s a brown brick building with a checkerboard of square windows up the side—unexciting from the outside, but it promises so much on the inside. To my right, castle-like university buildings loom, probably lecture halls.
Zeno heads for the small parking lot attached to the checkerboard dorm.
Few people mingle, while another family unloads a van.
The building has been open to move-in for the past few days, but Zeno suggested waiting until the end to avoid the rush.
It meant fewer days hanging around the room with Lev, waiting for the semester to begin, so no complaints.
Zeno pops the trunk and starts unloading my four suitcases. I roll two towards the few small steps leading up to the building, and Zeno trails me with the other two. Right as I’m about to tap the button to open the door, it swings open, an imposing form appearing.
Lev smirks, highlighting that dimple on his cheek, before ducking for my suitcases. His fingers brush against mine as he grasps the handles and carries them up the rest of the stairs.
“Hello again. Guess we meet sooner than expected.”
Zeno reaches the top, lowering his bags to stretch his back and offer his hand in a shake, which Lev accepts after a slight hesitation. “Thanks for being here.”
He bobs his head before taking my bags inside while I hold the door for them both, having nothing of my own to carry.