Chapter 39
Logan
I call my sister for the second time today.
"What is it, Lou-lou, missing me already?" she jokes as she answers, but a sigh seems to give away my state, because she immediately switches gears. "What happened? Is it Tanny's mom?"
"No!" I hurry to explain. "She's fine. She woke up, like I said in my message earlier, and the doctors are confident about her recovery."
"Oh, good! What's got you all worked up, then?"
"You can tell I'm worked up just from a sigh?"
She laughs on the other end of the line.
"That and your tone of voice. Spit it out already," she asks, and I pull air hard into my lungs before starting.
I'm outside the Clarkes' house, after we improvised a Christmas lunch to celebrate the Christmas miracle in the form of Marta getting better. Ethan and Charlie had passed out after eating, but I couldn't relax.
Not after Ethan had told us he loved us in no uncertain terms.
"I think I'm in love," I confess, kicking an old ball left in the yard.
"Okay... With Ethan?"
"Seriously? That's your first guess?" I ask, kind of indignant. Was I walking around with it written on my forehead or something?
My sister laughs.
"Well, you are, aren't you?"
"Well, yeah, but..."
"Hallelujah! Finally! I can almost hear the angels' trumpets at this miracle!" she exclaims, and I roll my eyes.
"You're ridiculous," I complain with a groan, and Jamie laughs even harder. "Since when was it so obvious?"
"Since always, I think. It got more obvious after Tanny came out, of course, because he got less careful about hiding that he was into you," she declares, and I choke.
"That's impossible."
"No it's not. Mom and I gossiped about it soooo many times," she confesses, drawing out the vowel to really drive the point home.
"No way, I would have noticed."
"Actually no, your view was kind of blocked by those heterosexuality glasses," she claims, and I huff.
"You're making this up to annoy me," I shoot back, and she laughs. I can picture her shrugging too.
"Fool yourself all you want, little bro, but come on. What happened to make you realize it?" she asks, and I even lean against the side of the Clarkes' garage.
I give her a summarized version of everything that had happened since I caught Ethan and Charlie kissing in our kitchen, months ago, up to the present moment. When I finish, my sister finally sounds very surprised.
"Wait! Are you telling me you're in love with Ethan and Charlie?" she asks, emphasizing the "and" that linked the names.
"Well... yeah. I think that's it."
The line goes quiet for almost a whole minute, until Jamie bursts into laughter.
"Wow, Lou-lou, I thought I was the big surprise of this family, but you, a 'pseudo-straight' until yesterday, now showing up in a throuple... you're really trying to outdo me," she says, laughing so hard I can't resist and join her.
"Think this might be the time Mom has a heart attack?"
"I don't think so... but bring a box of chocolates when you come to introduce your boyfriends to her, okay?" she advises, and I nod, still laughing a little.
"But they're not my boyfriends yet," I say, uneasy. "Actually, I called you to help me understand if... what I'm feeling is really love."
I sound more insecure than I expected, but Jamie is quick to answer.
"Little bro, I knew you loved Ethan a long time ago.
And from what you told me, Charlie showed up just to blow it wide open.
She was the missing piece to fit you all together.
Just from your voice when you talk about them, I can say with 100 percent certainty that you're in love," she states, and my heart skips a beat as I let her words hit me.
"And apparently, Tanny already gets that too. Just Charlie left."
"And what if she doesn't feel the same about us?"
"I don't know her that well yet, but I think she does. She was just hurt a lot in the past and feels insecure. Make her see that her heart is safe with you two, and everything will work out," she explains, and it makes a lot of sense.
"How do I do that?"
"I'm really smart, but I'm not an oracle, you know?" she teases, laughing, and I roll my eyes. "That's for you and Ethan to figure out together and act on."
I breathe in deep once more in the span of a few minutes.
"Okay. I think I can do that. We can do that." I try to sound confident.
"Of course you can. You two always got everything you wanted."
"That's true."
"Don't be cocky," she complains, and I laugh.
"And stop talking my ear off and go chase after your girl and guy.
And show up at the house when I can call them my brothers-in-law, all right?
" she demands, and it's like a whole weight of doubts and insecurity is lifted off my shoulders with one simple conversation.
"Deal. Thanks, little sis. I love you," I say goodbye, and I can even picture her smile on the other end.
"I know. Love you too. Now go grab your throuple," she says before hanging up, and I stand there smiling.
Jamie was right, as always. It was time to act and ask my two favorite people to be mine.
Charlotte
Two days later, Marta Clarke was finally transferred from the ICU to a regular hospital room and insisted on meeting me, and it goes without saying how nervous I was.
It was like meeting the mom of a... boyfriend? Friend with benefits? I didn't even know what we were anymore. Ever since Ethan had declared himself and I saw in Logan the urge to do the same, my heart and mind had been a mess.
However, none of that was the focus right now, so I push it to the back of my mind again and follow Ethan into the room.
The woman with black hair and brown eyes is lying in the hospital bed, but with the back raised up high. She still has the catheter in her neck, which wouldn't be coming out anytime soon, but she looks more flushed and stronger than I expected for a person who'd been through so much.
"You must be the famous Charlotte," Marta says the moment I walk in, and I smile shyly, approaching the bed.
"Yes, ma'am." My answer makes her wave her hand.
"None of that ma'am business here. Call me Marta," she asks and holds out a hand toward me. "And come here so I can see you properly. These boys never remember to bring my glasses."
That pulls a little laugh out of me, and I do what she asks. She takes my left hand between hers and gives it a few little pats.
"There we go! You're even prettier than in the photos my son showed me," she says, and I blush a little.
"Thank you. I'm glad you're doing well," I say honestly, and the woman smiles tenderly, without letting go of me.
"Thank you for staying here all this time just to support my son. I owe a lot to you and that boy over there in the doorway." She points with her chin, and I turn my face to see Logan leaning against the frame. "Got shy all of a sudden, Logan Hayes? Get over here!"
Logan cracks up and comes closer on the other side of the woman's bed. Marta takes his hand too.
"I just didn't want to intrude, Mrs. Clarke."
"Are we back to this ma'am business? I've known you since that pretty voice of yours was still cracking through puberty!" she accuses, and I press my lips together to keep from laughing. Ethan doesn't mind it and laughs, earning a look of fake anger from the blond.
"Sorry, Marta," he asks, and she nods, satisfied.
"How are your mom and sister?"
"Really well. Jamie got into Harvard early and is bursting with excitement," he says, and Marta declares her pride and makes him promise to send her regards to his family.
After that she turns her attention to me.
"Tell me about yourself, dear. I want to know everything," she asks, and I get a little shy, but I try to sum it up.
"Well... I'm studying computer science and I work as a teacher's assistant for the statistics class.
I grew up in Hanover and my family still lives there.
My dad died when I was little and my mom never remarried.
She's a doctor. I don't have siblings, but I have my cousin, Maddie, who's practically like one," I say almost in one breath, and Marta keeps the tender smile on her face. "And I think that's it."
"I'm sorry about your dad, but I'm glad your mom managed to raise you on her own and turn you into this pretty girl in front of me," she compliments, and I blush.
"Thank you."
"Ethan had already told me several things about you, but it's nice to put the stories to a real face," she remarks, and I just nod, because I don't know what to say.
She stares at me for long seconds, with that expression typical of moms who are just waiting for their kids to reveal their secrets already, because she's going to find out one way or another.
Unfortunately, I don't know what she's expecting me to reveal.
"But tell me. Are these lovesick little eyes meant for my Ethan, or for our Logan here?"
Oh.
So that was it.
I stammer, and I'm sure the redness of my face is already spreading down to my chest. I trade a look with Logan and then Ethan, trying to get them to telepathically tell me what I should answer.
Since that doesn't happen, I go back to looking at her and try to form the words, but it doesn't seem to be necessary anymore.
"Oh." Marta's eyes widen a little. "Oh. I see. It's both of them."
My body freezes and I don't even try to deny it. I stand there waiting for her reaction, whether it be the curses, the outrage, or the suggestion that I should try an exorcism for my sins.
None of that comes, however.
Marta just stares at Ethan at the foot of her bed for a long moment.
"You know this is going to be hard, don't you?" she says to her son, and he nods.
"I know."
"And you understand what you might have to give up?"
"Yes. I'm willing to take the risk," Ethan answers without even blinking.
"You really do love them." This time it's not a question, just a statement, but he smiles and answers anyway.
"A lot, Mom," he says, and it seems to resonate straight into my chest. My heart beats so hard that I consider calling my own mom to ask if this couldn't be a heart attack.
I'm sure my hand is sweating a lot against Miss Marta's, but she doesn't complain or let go, just breaks into a slight smile after a few more moments.
"Then I'll be here to support you every step of the way," she says, like it's the simplest thing in the world and not that she'd processed and accepted the idea of her son's three-way relationship in less than ten minutes.
Ethan breaks into a giant smile and wipes away a tear that escapes.
"Thank you, Mom. I love you so much."
"I love you more," she assures, and then squeezes my hand and Logan's, bringing both closer to her chest. "And now I'll love you as an extension of him too."
Good Lord.
I was going to cry.
And have a panic attack.
Or hug that woman and never let go.
Maybe all at once.