Chapter 16
A party in the afternoon, a concert at night, no alarms set for tomorrow morning. Who is she and what has she done with the real Bianca?
It feels wrong, like she’s forgetting to do something, but no, for once, there’s nothing.
No looming deadlines or stress over her next presentation or, now, not even the general, ever-present terror of what she’s going to do with the rest of her life.
Degree, done. Job, secured. Now she just has to . . . enjoy life?
Is that what she’s been doing for the last couple of weeks? Is this what life is supposed to be like?
Sounds fake, but sure, she’ll buy in, at least for a little while longer.
Especially with Xavier’s hand at the small of her back, his thumb running back and forth in tiny circles near the top of her jeans, her side brushing against his as they make their way down to the floor of the Staples Center, or whatever the hell it’s called now.
“I’ve never had seats this good to anything,” Xavier says, guiding her around a vibrating group of teenaged girls with manic expressions in their eyes and homemade tie-dyed t-shirts with letters on them that if unscrambled she’s pretty sure would spell out WE LOVE MARI.
She just smiles up at him and shrugs.
“What, you have?”
“Frankie works for the Dodgers, so she’s always getting tickets to games and concerts at the stadium.”
“You’re a baseball fan?”
“I’m an LA fan.”
“Hometown loyalty, I can see that.”
“What about you?”
“Never had a hometown long enough to care about a team. I’ve always liked tennis though.”
“That . . . makes sense . . . Wait, who’s your favorite player?”
“Of all time? Serena, obviously. On the men’s side, Federer, before he retired.”
“Oh thank God.”
“What?”
“For a minute I was worried I was going to have to end our fengagement.”
“Worried I was gonna say Djokovic?”
“I mean, not that he isn’t a great tennis player . . .”
“But he’s a complete asshole?”
“Exactly.”
It’s not long before Julie takes the stage, the lights going down low. The crowd, maybe not as feral as they will be for Mari, are singing along – thanks to a couple of Julie’s songs that went viral – and having a great time.
It’s so cool to see her friend up on that massive stage, with fans who know the words to her songs, after years of dive bars and open mic nights and the struggle of trying to make it.
Then, just as Julie’s taking a little break, a security guard approaches them.
“If you two could come with me, please?”
“Is everything okay?” Xavier asks.
“Everything’s fine, this way, please,” he says again, gesturing behind him toward the stage, and it gets them moving.
The security guard leads them through one of the guardrails keeping the fans on the floor away from the stage and then around toward the back and up a set of metal stairs.
“What is happening?” Xavier murmurs in her ear.
“I think . . . I think we’re . . . I think we’re going backstage.”
“Holy shit.”
They’re led to the side stage where they can see Julie at her piano, spotlights on her as she talks to the crowd.
“There’s a very special guest here tonight.
My incredible roommate here in LA who was with me through every up and down in my career.
I’ve never told her this before, but that song you all love so much, the one that got me here, it was about her.
She just got her PhD and she’s the smartest, most amazing person I know, so give it up for Dr Bianca Dimitriou! ”
The crowd goes absolutely apeshit, high-pitched screams coming in waves, washing over Bianca as she’s guided out onto the stage by a man in a headset.
The lights are blinding and Julie is glowing under one of the spotlights.
Bianca looks back at Xavier, who sends her an encouraging smile and a thumbs up.
His mouth forms words, but she has no idea what he’s saying over the sheer wall of noise hitting the stage.
There’s a high wooden stool sitting beneath a spotlight and Bianca sits on it precariously, hooking the heels of her shoes around the bar at the bottom to keep herself from tilting off the damn thing in front of tens of thousands of people.
The shrieking fans reach new heights as Julie’s fingers hit the keys of her piano in a soft tinkling melody, a song about coming to a new city and trying to find your place, and unexpected connections between people as different as the moon and the sun and finding friendship as an adult.
It’s beautiful and Bianca’s heard Julie play it live before, but never quite like this, with both of them on the cusp of the new lives they were working toward for their entire friendship.
And she can’t help the tears that start to form at the corners of her eyes and fall one after another, and she’s crying, not like she did at the bar, just a few droplets hastily wiped away, but full-on rivulets of tears streaming down her face.
It’s a release, not entirely unlike what’s happened with Xavier when they’ve been together, but somehow just as necessary.
Julie’s fingers race across the piano keys during a break in the lyrics, but the crowd is cheering louder now that they aren’t singing along.
“That’s her fiancé, y’all,” Julie calls out into the mic. “He also has a PhD, but really, his greatest accomplishment is falling in love with the coolest girl in the world.”
Then he’s in front of her, his hands cupping her cheeks and wiping away the tears with his thumbs. Her face lifts and their eyes meet and he’s smiling softly at her, saying something, but she still can’t hear him or read his lips, so she just shrugs, finally managing to stop the flow of tears.
He shakes his head and steps back, but not away completely, holding out his hand, and his intention is clear enough without words. So she takes it, lets him fold his strong fingers over hers, a soft tug all that’s necessary to have her sliding from the stool and stepping into his arms.
He lifts their joined hands to his shoulder and his other finds the curve of her waist, leading her into a slow dance to the rhythm of the song.
She wants to marvel that he knows how to dance after insisting that he didn’t the other night, but there’s no way he’ll hear her over the song and the crowd and the beating of her own heart.
So, instead, she just steps in closer and lays her head against his chest, closing her eyes as they sway together inside the most perfect moment she could ever imagine.
It would be so easy to love him. So easy to just give in and let herself fall, to feel every excruciating, wonderful, torturous thread of it wrap around her heart, wrap it up tight for him and no one else.
His fingertips trail up and down her back, sending a flurry of goosebumps over her skin.
They’ll never dance like this in the middle of some overpriced catering hall with their friends and family watching and tearing up while they whisper words no one else can hear to each other. But they can have this.
It’s all over in a whirlwind. When the song ends, they pull away and Julie races across the stage to give them a hug, and they hustle away from the spotlight while she continues her set.
Bianca heads into one of the dressing rooms and wipes off most of her destroyed eyeliner with a makeup wipe one of the makeup artists backstage had handy.
Xavier’s waiting for her when she gets out. “You good?” he asks and for the first time since going backstage she can hear his voice.
“Yeah, let’s go.”
They head back down into the crowd and Julie’s set is already over. Everyone in the VIP section is nursing another drink.
Xavier leans down and nearly presses his mouth to her ear to ask, “Dirty Shirley?”
She grins up at him and nods.
“Professor?” a voice asks from behind her and she cringes. She knows that voice from this past semester and she wracks her brain trying to remember what grade she gave this girl. She thinks it was an A, but . . .
Turning around, she grins at the slightly younger woman – Zoe, if she’s remembering correctly – with a group of other girls about her age.
“I knew it!” Zoe says, waving her friends over. “Guys, this is Professor Dimitriou, or I guess Dr Dimitriou now! Her Intro to Research class literally saved my life this year.”
“Hi ladies,” Bianca says, taking in the bright eager faces. God, they look so young. She’s more than a decade older than them, but it feels like at least three right now.
“That was your fiancé? He is so hot.”
“Dude, that’s Professor Byrne, I had him for archaeology! Hot doesn’t even cover it.”
“You guys were so adorable up there! Can I see the ring?”
The gaggle of them let out excited shrieks when she holds out her left hand.
“It’s gorgeous. He did good.”
“Yeah, he did,” Bianca agrees, knowing the revelation that the ring belonged to his mom might send them into actual apoplexy.
Xavier comes back, drinks in hand, and smiles at the girls. It’s not a real one, just wide and bright, but enough to absolutely ruin these girls for any undergrad boys who hit on them in the foreseeable future.
“Ladies,” he says, “mind if I steal my fiancée back?”
Zoe giggles and her friends do the same. “Of course, have fun!”
“Here you go.” Xavier hands over her drink, which she downs in one long draft from the straw. “Whoa.”
“They’re not even my students anymore and it still stresses me out.”
“I mean, they’re the ones underage drinking, I think we’re good.”
“Yeah?” she asks as he downs the amber liquid in his cup.
“Yeah,” he agrees, just as the lights go down and a hush full of urgency and anticipation washes over the crowd.
She turns toward the stage and feels him move in behind her as the crowd surges forward around them, straining toward the gates and line of security guards in the gap between them and the biggest star in the world.
Bianca’s happy to stand back and just take it all in as the beat picks up from the speakers, buzzing over her skin, deep and resonant, and then Mari marches out on stage, all glitz and sparkles, her voice sultry and absolute fire.