Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Seven
G us stood by the front window, golden leaves falling from the branches gathering on the sidewalk. The wind whipped up the leaves and scattered them as his neighbors cleaned their lawns and took down their decorations. By mid-November, pumpkins had disappeared from porches and were replaced with turkey silhouettes and wooden harvest-themed signs greeting impending holiday visitors. There had been an uptick in visitors to the historical society ever since Jess’s show had debuted to massive streams and ratings. They wanted to see the heartsick Dearworth magician in his natural environment, away from the sequins. Visitors couldn’t bring themselves to glance in his direction; anytime they did they peered at him with open looks of embarrassment or—ugh—pity. At least they signed the guestbook and left notes of appreciation for the new exhibitions. Of course, Gus defaulted to his usual mode and showed that he wasn’t licking his wounds over his failed marriage. A few reporters had emailed him for a comment about Jess’s impending wedding, but he had nothing to say but to offer his best wishes.
The wedding was two weeks away, and he needed to keep his peace.
He pulled his blanket close to his shoulders, fighting against the shudders that racked his body. Unable to button up a vest and his dress pants, he donned a T-shirt, sweatpants, and warm socks. Gus groaned; his head was so congested that he mixed up a Herkimer diamond with a moonstone in the mineral room. He closed the historical society early since he was so ill. He couldn’t hold a simple conversation about faery rings with His Royal Highness Xavier Alder. Everything from his hairline to his toenails whined in pain. Gus dropped his blanket on the floor.
He needed soup, tea, and fluffy bread.
Gus shuffled into the kitchen, searching through the shelves for a single can or container of chicken noodle, tomato, or even lentil soup. After ten more minutes of futile searching, Gus sat down at the kitchen island and slumped over in a hacking mess.
Diane texted him, but Gus had warned her away, not wanting to get her sick. It was perfect soup weather—but of course he didn’t have any soup in the house. Just his luck. He took out his phone, opened the Empty Fridge app, and scrolled for a possible restaurant. Why couldn’t there be a request-a-kitchen-witch button?
Be for real; what you want isn’t on this app.
He missed Sirena, but things had been odd ever since the morning after Halloween. She’d asked to push back her culinary work at the historical society until the new year and he agreed to her request. They texted back and forth, but she hadn’t asked him to come over or spend the night. He didn’t blame her. Ma’s constant questioning about their status didn’t help their fragile connection and he hadn’t been very useful. Gus couldn’t have agreed to go slow with Sirena and then immediately introduce her as his girlfriend. If Ma found out Sirena was his kindred, then all bets were off and all the Dearworths would want to meet her at the next reunion.
There was a loud knock at the door. Gus answered it.
Hello, chef. Sirena walked in, her breath coming out in sharp pants, black glasses on the edge of her nose. Since when did she wear glasses? There was still so much about Sirena he didn’t know but wanted to learn. Her button-up shirt was slightly undone and her pants were a little wrinkled, but she was as lovely as usual. Her hair was unbraided and wavy, slightly styled, as if she quickly applied a layer of gel and then forgot about it. Desire bloomed inside him.
“Special delivery,” she said. She held up a shopping bag with her unhurt hand. She shifted her crossed body with her healing hand. Her cast was covered in a few stickers.
“You’ve caught a leaf.” Gus reached over and plucked it from her hair, savoring its softness. He put the leaf on the table. He did not know what to do with his hands.
“Diane said you weren’t feeling well, so I brought you homemade soup and ice cream.”
“You cooked for me,” he said.
She lifted a shoulder with a grin. “It’s perfect soup weather.”
She took out the soup and put it on the counter.
He peered at the large tub. “I can’t finish all that soup. Join me.”
She gave him a brisk nod, put the ice cream in the freezer, then got a large stockpot from underneath the sink and put it on the stove burner. Gus took two bowls and spoons from the cabinet. Sirena heated up the soup. He went into the dining room with the spoons while she cooked. He lined up the candles on the table, then snapped his fingers. The candles ignited, and the room took on a pleasing glow. Sirena came into the room, holding two bowls of steaming soup, an amused smile playing on her lips.
“A good meal deserves a perfect setting,” he said.
“I might have a playlist,” she said.
Sirena served up the food, set up her phone, and took her seat next to him. The space filled with light jazzy music that reminded Gus of the local radio station that specialized in quiet storm music. Gus held out a spoon to Sirena. She took it from him with a smile. He clicked her spoon to his and scooped up a huge mouthful. When the savory taste exploded on his tongue, Gus gave a low growl of appreciation. How could tomato, carrots, and shredded chicken taste this good? What did she sprinkle in this? Pure dopamine? He ate for another minute, holding back from pouring the soup down his throat like a hungry bear.
Gus looked at Sirena. Her face widened in surprise. “Did you just growl?”
He gripped the spoon in his hand. He gestured to her bowl. “Have you tried it yet?”
She smiled to herself. “It’s a new recipe.”
“Taste it,” he said firmly. Heat twinkled in her eyes. Gus couldn’t wait to see the flash of pleasure that would cross her face when she had a taste. Sirena held his attention for a long beat. She maintained eye contact as she spooned and tasted the soup. Her eyes rolled slightly back in her head. Her tongue darted out of her mouth and licked the broad side of the spoon. She let out a deep guttural noise from the back of his throat that hit him right in the groin. Gus licked his lips. He remembered hearing that sound echo in his ears as she gradually spread her legs and he lowered his head and pressed his lips against the core of her. He bit back a curse.
Sirena studied Gus over the table. “That’s good.”
Her smile sent his blood racing. If the fires of Venus didn’t burn for centuries… Gus leaned forward. She kept her eyes trained on him while she licked her spoon. Was she thinking about all the wicked things they had done underneath the candlelight?
She seemed to enjoy teasing him. Her breath grew ragged as he lapped up the broth. Inwardly, Gus greedily hoped. Pleaded. Wished. I hope you never forget how good my body felt on your lips. I hope I never forget how you taste on my tongue. I hope you remember us together in the dark. Think about something else. Distract yourself.
“What’s in the soup? It’s delicious. My compliments to the chef.”
“I have to be honest. I had help.”
“How many witches does it take to make a soup?” he asked.
Sirena made a face. “It takes four. One to make a playlist, two to prep the ingredients, and one to watch the soup simmer.”
Gus laughed; then he sobered up. “How’s your spark?”
She sighed, putting down her spoon in the bowl. “It dimmed a lot after the interview. I couldn’t make breakfast without worrying I’d burn it. My confidence took a hit, but I’m working on it.”
“But you’ve got it now.”
“I’m getting better,” she said lightly.
“Have you heard from Lighthouse yet?” he ventured.
Sirena made a face. “Funny you should ask, but I did get an email. The manager gave me a quick update. The chef I’m supposed to be replacing wants to stay on for another six months. The owner agreed, so they won’t need a replacement after all.”
Gus huffed in disbelief. How dare this fancy restaurant waste her precious time? “So, what now?”
“I’m not waiting around for an offer. I want to keep having fun. Like Nana used to say, I have a few irons in the fire, and I’m exploring my options. I’m writing a cookbook.”
He blinked. “What made you change your mind?”
Sirena gave him a sheepish grin. “I’ve really enjoyed cooking with my family. I want to share that fun with other people, so I’m going to write it down. I’m going to share our magic.”
“I’m so proud of you,” he said.
Her voice dropped to a soft whisper. “Thank you.”
He cleared his throat. “I didn’t know you wore glasses.”
Sirena touched them with a fingertip. “Ah, yes. I lost my contact lenses, and it was just easier to wear glasses. I needed to see the lace details on Lucy’s wedding dress.”
“How’s wedding planning?” he asked.
“It’s going smoothy. Ursula’s helping with the flowers. I’m getting the catering together with a local restaurant. Callie wanted to know about the rental fee for the society for the wedding.”
Gus waved his hand. “Consider it my gift to the bride and groom.”
Sirena looked at him and her mouth dropped open. “You can’t do that.”
“I can and I did. I’d rather you donate to the historical society.”
“You’re going to be leaving this place soon.”
Gus hesitated. “I don’t know if I should leave.”
They shared a look. A mixture of confusion and reluctance went through him as he thought about the path forward.
“Have you talked to your mother about it?” Sirena asked.
“We haven’t spoken since my after-birthday brunch,” he said. They had texted about Diane’s birthday in January, but that was the extent of their conversation. The responses were short and clipped. Ma was upset that he didn’t have an answer for her about rejoining the tour.
He didn’t want to make a commitment only to back out at the last second.
“Don’t let it go too long. Talk to her about how you feel,” she said.
“I’ve tried,” Gus responded.
“Try again,” Sirena said softly. He heard something like regret in her voice and paused. Life changed in an instant, and he didn’t want to leave things with Ma unresolved.
They finished their soup. Gus got up and started to collect the empty bowls.
“My compliments to the head chef and her cooks.”
Sirena reached for her bowl, but he moved away.
“My date doesn’t clean up after me,” Gus said.
Sirena’s voice grew soft. “I’m not your date, remember?”
“Well, you were tonight,” Gus said.
Her brow furrowed in thought, but she said nothing.
He shuffled out of the room and went back into the kitchen. If she was his date, then he would greet her with a kiss at the door and sweep her up in his arms. They would be together. It was clear. They’d order a cheesecake, crash into his room, and take nibbles off each other. Then they’d fumble upstairs, undress, and chase away the lonely ghosts that haunted them every day. Gus put the bowls in the sink with a clatter, interrupting his fantasies.
He turned away from the sink to see Sirena standing there with her purse on her shoulder.
“I should leave you to rest,” she said.
“You could stay for ice cream.”
Sirena peered at him. “Do you think that’s a good idea?”
Gus let out a mirthless chuckle. “Haven’t you heard? I’m terrible at being good.”
They were going to need sugar for this long-overdue conversation. Gus went to the freezer. He took out the ice cream and grabbed two clean spoons from the drawer. Sirena went over to the table.
He sat down next to her and extended a spoon to Sirena. “I never told you about what happened with Jess.”
She narrowed her eyes in reluctance but took the utensil from him. “You don’t have to tell me.”
Gus took off the pint’s lid and scooped up a good chunk of ice cream.
“I want you to know,” he said.
He let the cold deliciousness roll around in his mouth.
“I didn’t think I’d fall in love with my wife. I thought it would be just fun to get married,” Gus said.
“Your marriage wasn’t real. But… it seemed like you loved her,” she said.
He kept talking, passing the ice cream carton between the two of them.
“We decided that getting married would solve our problems without getting emotionally involved. We knew what happened when celebrities married for true love and let emotions cloud their career decisions.”
Sirena made an ah noise. “It was a partnership.”
He gave a curt nod. So far, Sirena hadn’t tossed down her spoon and walked out on him. He was thankful that she was open to listening to his story. “Yes. Jess wanted to avoid that problem, so we entered the marriage with clear eyes and a plot treatment. I’m supposedly in love with the niece of my mother’s rival. How romantic. How dramatic. How fun.”
A light of understanding entered her eyes. “I see.”
“Ma warned me not to do it.” Gus heard her voice play in his head. It’s all fun and games until you have a broken heart. Tread carefully. Give it time. “I told her ‘I got this’ and that I knew what I was doing. I should’ve watched more romance movies. I acted like a man in love, and I rushed into my marriage.”
“You can learn a lot from Nancy Meyers’s movies,” she teased with a light smile.
He adored Sirena for trying to lighten the mood, but he couldn’t keep the sense of foolishness from coming up within his chest. His gut rioted.
Gus lowered his head for a moment. “I fell in love with Jess and I fell hard. She said she wasn’t interested in staying married to someone who couldn’t keep a promise. I thought I could pull the greatest illusion of all and become the man she could spend forever with. I used every ounce of magic I possessed to transform myself into that person—into permanently becoming Good-Time Gus and—she served me with papers.”
That fateful day was the last time Gus ever told anyone outside of his family that he loved them. He was ready to tell Sirena he loved her on Halloween, but he lost his nerve and didn’t tell her. For now, it was enough that she knew that she was his kindred.
“Oh,” Sirena said breathlessly.
I had no one to blame but myself for my broken heart.
“Jess was right to do it,” he said. “I didn’t see that at the time, but I do now. She knew she didn’t love me like that, and we both deserved to find true love.”
Gus would always appreciate Jess for loving him enough to let him go and end their arrangement.
“So, you never thought that Jess might be your kindred,” Sirena said.
“No. I didn’t believe in the idea of a kindred until—” He paused, letting his eyes roam over Sirena. I didn’t believe until I met you.
“Until when?” she asked.
“I didn’t believe until much later,” he restated. “Good-Time Gus was a whole jerk. I wouldn’t want to be in the same house as him. I mean, I turned my hair blond and started wearing terrible body spray.”
Sirena eyed him. “Oh, Gus, no.”
He groaned thinking about his platinum-blond hair and mesh top. “I smelled like a walking pi?a colada. It wasn’t a good look for me. Diane forced me to see what I was becoming. I left the act and took a hiatus in Freya Grove to take care of myself. Ma hopes I’ll come back to the stage. She hopes that I can still be Good-Time Gus.”
That was the Gus that Ma knew and the version of him that she wanted back onstage with her in London. He couldn’t let himself be that magician, but he didn’t want to let his family down.
“Does she know this version of you, Gus?” Sirena said carefully.
Gus said nothing, unease roiling in his gut. I’m afraid Ma doesn’t like this version of me.
Sirena finished a bite of ice cream, then spoke. Her voice was serene. “Do you want my advice or my support?”
“I’d like both, if you can give it,” he said.
Sirena gestured around at the society’s kitchen walls. “Show her everything that you’ve done here in the Grove. Don’t hold back a single thing. Tell her everything, so she can see who you are. You think you can pretend behind those serious clothes, upstanding posture, and that serious beard? I see who you are.”
“Tell me what you see,” he said, a little too stiffly.
“You’re trying too hard to be boring,” she said. “Trying to be someone who demands uprightness and will be seen as a serious man. You are bad at being boring, and that’s okay.”
“So, you expect me to be a fool,” he said. Gus drew out a curt laugh. He was never going to escape his past.
I refuse to be anybody’s fool.
She dropped her spoon on the table. “Why do you think the Fool is the first card in the tarot?”
He shook his head, not trusting his voice.
Sirena gave him an assessing glance. “We are all fools before we experience life and learn harsh lessons, then lose our carefree spirits,” she said sagely. “Despite everything that’s happened, you’ve managed to hold on to that carefree magic. You’ve kept that ability to wonder, to play. It’s such a gift, my dear August, and I wish that you never, ever lose it.”
Gus swallowed down the knot of joy that rose in his throat. He yearned to give her what she deserved—a castle by the sea. He wanted to tell her what he knew in his soul—that he truly, fully loved her. But he held back. If he said the words now, then his love would become a living, dangerous event, like a wildfire. His love would do what a fire does best, and it would have the power to light his life or consume it. He yearned to live in the light.
Sirena glanced at the wall behind him, where he knew the clock was, and winced. “Look at the time. I should’ve been home already.”
Gus stood up and walked Sirena the short distance to the back door.
He opened the door, and the hinge squeaked.
She pivoted to him, causing them to be face-to-face. “Kiss me good night?” she asked.
He nodded absentmindedly, too dazed at her simple request to realize that it was a bad, bad idea. His body droned with anticipation, but his brain yelled at him to consider his choices. If she kissed him on the lips, he might disappear into a cloud of smoke. If he kissed her on the lips, then he’d be tempted to yank her back into the house and convince her to stay with him. She leaned over into his space, mere inches away from his mouth, but he moved at the last moment. Instead, she pressed her lips, softly, gently to his neck.
Right there underneath his ear. He let out a low groan.
That was the spot, his spot, that sent shivers straight down his body and left him aching and throbbing, a delicious sensation that made his knees lock up. The spot where she had once teased the delicate skin with her soft lips and teeth while she was on top of him. Would it be wrong to moan out loud right now? Would it? He fought the urge to gather her up into his arms and carry her to the kitchen table. Craving, once buried deep within, clawed its way to the surface and took hold. His sex pulsated out a message. Let her stay. He hummed happily when his hand came up and stroked her arm. Finally common sense, late to the party, returned and reminded him of their friend status. He moved away, pressing his hand to his neck.
She whispered good night to him, then left. A stray thought flashed in his mind.
I could stay in the Grove forever and wish for your kiss. For your touch. For your heart.
They were indeed kindred. Now, what spell could he cast to make him speak his love out loud?