Chapter 7 #3
“Oh, and one more thing. My wife, Melody, told me I had to tell you this part; that it wasn’t fair if I didn’t, and it was an invasion of privacy or some such bullcrap.
The phone has a tracker. I’ll know where you are at all times when you have it on you.
I’ve learned over the years that it’s better to be safe than sorry.
I’m not a psycho, I won’t be following your every move, but if you disappear, and you have that phone with you, I’ll be able to find you. Okay?”
Sierra stared into Tex’s brown eyes and swallowed hard.
She knew she should be upset at the invasion of her privacy.
But the simple fact was, she couldn’t be.
She’d disappeared once and it had taken a year for anyone to find her.
If it happened again, Tex would know where she was.
The thought brought a level of comfort she hadn’t even realized she needed. “Okay,” she told him softly.
“All right then. I need to get going, and so do all of you. I’m very glad to meet you, Sierra. Take care of yourself. And don’t be afraid to open up to Grover and his inner circle. They’ll heal you if you let them.”
Tex nodded at her, and the guys, then turned and walked toward the end of the building.
“So…that was Tex,” Doc said with a little laugh.
“He’s…”
“Sneaky? A little scary? All of the above?” Lucky asked. Then he shrugged. “You get used to him.”
“If you don’t want that phone, I can get you a new one,” Grover told her.
Sierra tightened her hold on the phone. “No,” she said quickly. “It’s okay.”
“He means well,” Trigger said gently. “He’s helped more people than I’ve got time to talk about. He knows just about everything there is to know about everyone.”
“Like the nickname Grover gave me?” Sierra asked wryly. “How’d he know that?”
Oz smiled. “We’ve learned not to ask questions we know we won’t get the answers to.”
“For the record,” Trigger told her, “I think The Refuge is a good idea. For both you and Grover. And even if you don’t feel as if you need it, I’ve heard it’s beautiful up there.
Brick and his team have done an amazing job setting it up.
You can be busy all hours of the day if you need to be—hiking, fishing, riding horses—or you can lie around in a hammock and do nothing at all. ”
Sierra nodded. The more she heard about the place, the more curious she got.
And knowing Grover might join her there?
Yeah, she was pretty darn excited about that too…
if he showed up. She knew he was busy, and a month seemed like an awfully long time from now.
Being apart, both of them dealing with their captivity, could make whatever this connection they felt now fade.
“Give me a second with Sierra, guys?” Grover asked.
Everyone nodded.
Before he left, Trigger stepped up to her. “May I hug you?” he asked.
Sierra was impressed he’d asked. But she supposed she shouldn’t have been. He, and all the guys, seemed very in tune to what she might be feeling. “I’d like that,” she told him.
Trigger stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, giving her a short but heartfelt hug. “I’m glad you’re all right.”
Then Lefty took his place. And Brain. One by one, each of Grover’s friends hugged her and told her how happy they were that Grover had found her. How strong they thought she was. How much they were sure their wives would love to meet her.
It should’ve been awkward, but instead, Sierra felt as if she’d known these men forever. Finally, they all headed into the building, leaving her and Grover alone outside.
She looked up at him, not sure what he was going to say…and suddenly she was nervous as hell.
But he didn’t say a word. Instead, he pulled her into his embrace.
Sierra lay her cheek against his chest and held on tightly, listening to his heartbeat under his uniform.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” he said, his voice strained.
“Do what?” Sierra asked, tilting her head back but not stepping out of his embrace.
“Let you go.”
She blinked at that.
“I know that sounds ridiculous. We barely know each other. Your parents are waiting for you. You have a life to get back to. Still…I can’t help but want to keep you by my side.”
Sierra swallowed hard. “I know,” she whispered.
Grover sighed, then palmed the back of her head and brought it back to his chest. Sierra held him tighter. “I didn’t know Tex planned on being here today, or bringing you that phone. I’d planned on giving you my number, of course, along with everyone else’s.”
“It’s okay,” Sierra told him.
“If it was anyone but Tex, I’d have thrown the phone at him and told him I can take care of you just fine without his help.”
Sierra didn’t know how to respond. Take care of her? What was that about?
“But it was Tex, and that man cares about his teams more than anyone I’ve ever met. So I’m gonna let it slide. Now that you have my number, I expect you to use it, Bean.”
“I will,” she said.
“I don’t care if it’s the middle of the night and you can’t sleep, or if it’s one in the afternoon and you think of something you want to tell me.
Text or call. I’ll answer every time if I’m able to.
I might be in a meeting or training, and if I am, I’ll always get back to you as soon as I can. Okay?”
Sierra wanted to ask him what they were doing, where this was going, where this intense connection was coming from…the one she’d felt even before getting kidnapped.
Instead, she simply nodded against him.
“I’ll see you in a month in New Mexico, but if you need anything before then, you let me know.”
Sierra took a breath and stepped away. Neither let go of each other. Grover’s hands moved to her upper arms, and hers flattened on his chest.
It was time she started trying to get her bravado back. She was tired of being a victim. She wanted to be the outgoing, carefree woman she’d once been. The one who wasn’t afraid to take a job in Afghanistan because it seemed both useful and like the adventure of a lifetime.
“And if you need anything, you let me know,” she told Grover a little bossily.
He smiled. “I will, Bean.”
Sierra tried not to smile. “That nickname is ridiculous.”
“Yup.”
“You aren’t going to stop calling me that, are you?” she asked.
“Nope. It fits you.”
“Whatever,” she said with a roll of her eyes.
Grover’s eyes raked over her face, then her hair and down her body.
Sierra expected to feel embarrassed or self-conscious, like she had in the cave.
She knew she needed to find someone to fix her hair, for sure.
Shave it evenly, something. She also knew she still had some bruises on her face and that her body wasn’t anything worth gawking at.
She’d lost weight all over, including her chest. But somehow, seeing the longing in Grover’s eyes made her feel almost normal.
“I’m gonna miss you,” he whispered.
“Same,” she said.
“That first time you reached out to me in that cave, after I’d been worked over by Shahzada…I knew,” Grover said.
When he didn’t continue, Sierra asked, “Knew what?”
“That you were it for me.”
She could only stare at him in surprise.
“You’d just been beaten yourself. Had no reason to trust me.
Had been held captive for a year. And yet there you were, trying to comfort me.
No one, Sierra, has affected me as much as you have from the moment we met.
From being disappointed that you didn’t contact me after I left Afghanistan the first time, to being worried when we heard you had gone AWOL, to being distraught when we learned contractors were disappearing, to being fucking scared out of my mind when I got your letter.
I’ve never felt as much for anyone as I have you. ”
Sierra knew she should be shocked. Should be wondering what the hell was wrong with this man.
But she wasn’t. Because she felt the same.
“You made me so mad when we first met,” she admitted.
“You accused me of being na?ve. Looking back now, I know I was na?ve. I was so gung-ho to serve my country in any way possible and to make a difference, even if it was just by serving food to the soldiers who put themselves on the line every day, that I didn’t even consider the fact that I could be in danger.
It was stupid, really. But I had to think there was a reason I was still alive after a year.
Had to believe that someday, someone would stumble across me and help me get out of there.
Then…you were there. Admitting that you’d actually gotten taken on purpose.
It was crazy. Insane, really. But the second I held your hand… I wasn’t as scared anymore.”
“It’s gonna suck to watch you walk away from me, but I know you’ll be fine. You don’t need me to hold your hand or smother you with my protectiveness. You need to get back on your feet and find yourself again, without me.”
His belief in her was overwhelming.
“I’ll see you in a month,” he said again, as if trying to confirm she’d go to The Refuge.
“You will,” she replied.
The relief in his eyes was instant. He leaned toward her, and Sierra held her breath, waiting for his kiss. But his lips brushed against her forehead, the gesture so gentle, once again her throat closed up. As usual, no tears formed in her eyes.
“I’m proud of you,” Grover said against her skin. “I admire you so much. Don’t let anyone bring you down. If they try, tell them to fuck off. That they should try living in a cave and getting beat on.”
Sierra couldn’t help but chuckle. “I will.”
Grover’s hand came up and ran over her head. She winced as he touched the uneven patches of hair. “This is your badge of honor. Don’t be ashamed of any damn thing you did to survive, Bean. Not one thing. Got it?”
She nodded.
“Okay. I could come up with a million more things to say to prolong this, but you have appointments to get to, and I’m sure the guys are anxious to get back to Texas to see their families,” Grover said.
Sierra nodded but didn’t step away.
“You aren’t helping,” he said.
She smiled up at him.
“Fuck,” he muttered, then leaned down and kissed her lightly on the lips. They still tingled when he lifted his head. “Come on, it’ll be warmer for you inside, and it’s time for you to eat something.”
Sierra nodded because she couldn’t speak. He was always taking care of her. Seemed to only have her best interests at heart. It was quite the change from the last year, when her captors had to be reminded to feed her and didn’t give a shit about her basic needs.
Grover’s hand was at the small of her back as he led them toward the door. Sierra wanted to stop, wanted to snuggle back into Grover’s embrace, but he was right. They both had lives to return to. And she so badly wanted to find the Sierra she once was.
A month. That wasn’t that long, really. Especially not after she’d survived a year at the hands of Taliban terrorists. She held the phone tighter. And it wasn’t as if she wouldn’t be able to talk to Grover.
A month? Piece of cake.