Chapter 31 Selma #2
Not to mention how she’d cope once she allowed the knowledge to take root, which wasn’t something she could do just yet—not when she had to focus on getting enough information out of the goddess in front of her to ensure her survival.
Swiftly she pushed away the hazy image of a white picket fence and sunny afternoons on a porch swing, even as her hand found and rested against her lower belly of its own accord.
Bealith smiled softly. “I am telling you this because I believe you have a chance at breaking this cycle of abuse and despair. Most demons who claim a mate will walk through fire to keep her, but the one who brought you here? He sacrificed his own needs for your benefit—no one’s ever thought these beasts were capable of selfless love, but this might be proof that the seed is in there.
If you can nurture it and spread it to your children…
my daughter, you could be the catalyst who finally defeats evil. ”
Selma’s mouth dropped open. “Whoa there! Kain was capable of love from when he was a child. I have nothing to do with that—and I think love is a fairly strong word for what’s between us! We’re doped up on each other’s pheromones, and he’s a good guy. That’s why he’s helping me.
“As for this catalyst nonsense? If what you’ve told me is true, then I’ve had quite enough of being a tool for gods to play with. All I want is to live in peace!”
To her frustration, all her minor rant got her was a chuckle from the glowing woman in front of her.
“My dear, you’re the only woman in history to call a demon a ‘good guy’ while knowing his true nature.
Even Breeders who grow content with their fate would never claim he is good.
That guy on the other side of this shield has crushed many humans' lives—it’s in his very nature.
Yet you see kindness where others see evil.
“Deny your heart if you wish, my daughter. When you have given birth to the demon in your womb, you will be able to live behind my walls—assuming you wish to turn your back on your mate and his son.
“But if you don’t—if you can find it in your heart to nurture the love and gentleness within them both—then no one’s to say that you cannot have the peaceful life you desire, along with helping light spread throughout a race that’s been ruled by darkness since the very beginning. The choice is yours.”
With a final glance in Selma’s direction, Bealith got up and turned to the wall, looking at the demon glaring at them.
“I can tell you that love is the way to connect to the power you were meant to have. You are so much more than a Breeder, so much more than a damaged woman defined by the monsters who want to use you. It’s up to you if you want to take that power.”
She turned her head to look at Selma over her shoulder, a small smile playing on her lips.
“I am needed elsewhere tonight, my child. Please do make sure your demon doesn’t wreak any more havoc on my sanctuary’s wards—he has already done damage that will take weeks to repair, and terrified your sisters residing here. ”
Selma frowned, the weight of the goddess’ words making her fold her arms protectively over her midriff. Just the thought of leaving a child behind, even a demon child she couldn’t even face the reality of just yet, sent cold shivers down her back.
“Choose wisely, daughter.”
A flourish of golden light and shining fabric made Selma squint to protect her eyes, and when she looked back up, the goddess was gone. So was the golden shield that had separated her from Kain.
“Selma.” He wrapped his arms around her before she fully realized she was alone with him again, and she gasped at the strength that crushed her against his hard chest. “I swear, I’m going to kill that fucking bitch! Are you all right? What happened? Ew, you reek of her!”
Selma laughed at his disgusted expression as he pulled his nose away from where he’d buried it in her hair. “I thought she smelled pretty nice. Like flowers and sunshine.”
The dark-eyed demon sent her a look which suggested that he was considering dunking her in the nearest river to lose the scent.
“What happened to you? And what did that deceitful hag tell you? Whatever it was, you need to know that none of them are to be trusted. They are as dangerous and tricky as demons—they just go about it differently.”
She was pretty sure he was unable to be objective about the trustworthiness of gods, but ironically, if she did take the goddess’ words for truth, then he had a point.
“Tell me what happened to you.” Concern was still evident in his voice, but his words bore the unmistakable air of a command. This demon had had enough of waiting.
“Er…” She’d hoped to have a little more time to digest everything before deciding on how and what to tell him, but when she looked up into his eyes, she knew he wasn’t going to accept anything but the immediate and full truth.
“Don’t freak out, all right?”
Both his eyebrows arched. “You do realize that is anything but a calming statement, right?”
“Sorry, it’s just, ah… So you know how that barrier keeps demons out?”
“Yes?”
Selma bit the inside of her cheek. They hardly knew each other. Despite the incredible intensity of their time together, they had only been around one another for a handful of days. Yet when his arms were around her, it felt like they’d known each other for a lifetime.
“Seriously, I need you to promise me you won’t freak out, because I can’t deal with that right now. I think I’m pretty terrified, and I don’t need you to—”
“Tell. Me. Now!”
Kain accentuated his growl by grabbing her arms and shaking her—gently, but it stopped her rambling.
“Right, sorry. So the barrier… it, uh, keeps demons out. All demons.”
His expression didn’t change to a look of understanding.
“Also baby demons,” she clarified. “So that’s why I got knocked out.”
For the longest time, he just stared at her. Selma stared back at his frozen face, not entirely sure if he’d grasped what she was trying to say.
“I’m pregnant.”
Actually saying it out loud did nothing to soothe her nerves, nor did his continued blank stare.
“…so I can’t stay at the Sanctuary. And I… I really need you to speak now, because I don’t know what to do and you’re freaking me out.”
When air wheezed out of his lungs, she realized he’d stopped breathing while she spoke.
“Selma…”
Her name on his lips sounded pained, and when he carefully released his grip on her arms, she felt the loss of contact way too keenly. Fear of rejection pierced her heart, making her wrap her arms around herself and the child she was apparently carrying to stem the ache.
“I know this isn’t what you want, but I need your help, okay? Please don’t leave.”
Shock finally cracked his frozen mask. “Leave? You think I’d—” He interrupted himself with a foul curse and stroked a hand through his hair in an obvious attempt at soothing the agitation that seemed to flow out through the broken facade. “You’re carrying my… my child?”
She nodded, more than a little confused at his reaction. “Bealith told me so, and it makes sense given what happened with the barrier.”
Kain went quiet again, his body stilling.
“Kain?” Gently she placed a hand on his chest, searching his eyes for a clue of what was going on. Her panic mixed with her confusion, resulting in an unpleasant roll in her gut.
That was when she saw the single tear drawing a path down his cheek.
“Why are you crying?” She could hardly press the words out as complete terror closed around her lungs. He was so strong, so stoic… and a freaking demon! Tears were not something she’d even thought him capable of.
He gasped in the night air, and when his nostrils flared, his eyes went dark, the moisture leaving them. The scent of her fear had finally cut through.
“I can’t let you leave.” It was a hoarse murmur. “If I touch you right now, I will never let go again. I can’t. Not now, not when he’s been born. Never.”
Oh. The motionless state of his body suddenly made sense—he was doing his very best to rein in instincts that were undoubtedly clamoring to grab her and lock her up somewhere.
Yet he was still trying.
Something in her chest loosened at the sudden realization that even now, even when his instincts were strengthened immeasurably by his upbringing with a mother who tried to leave him, he was still fighting tooth and nail against himself. For her.
Wordlessly she pressed herself against his powerful body. When he shivered, she wrapped her arms around his waist.
“Do you want this?” she asked, afraid of the answer, but nevertheless needing to know. “You planned on freeing me when you went to the auction, but instead… Do you even want a mate and a child? I know your instincts are probably making you feel certain things, but do you want it?”
Carefully, as if he thought she were made of spun glass, Kain raised one large hand and let it stroke through her hair.
“I want you with every fiber of my being. Both of you. I have never been… I am…” Kain bit his lip, raw emotion cutting across his angular features. “I am scared.” He said the word as if it was a foreign concept to him.
He wanted them. Wanted her and the life she was carrying. Relief made her shudder and bury her nose in his chest. As long as that held true, as long as he was there to lean on, she could do this.
Love.
The goddess’ words rang in her mind, and she frowned at the sweet pull they caused in her chest.
It was too soon—too much to deal with right now on top of everything else.
With sheer force of will, she pushed the swirling tangle of emotions aside and focused on the here and now—on Kain and the life growing inside her.
“I’m not going to leave. I don’t care that it’s a demon child. It’s mine, and I will love it always. I would never do to him what your mother did to you and your brother. I just need a bit of time to… well, to adjust.”
Kain’s strong arms encircled her again, pulling her tighter against him. A calm settled over her mind as his heat encompassed her.
Home. This was home.
“You will care for this child?”
Despite the coarse note, she heard the fear in his voice clearly.
“Yes.” Selma pulled her head back so she could look at him. “Always.”
Finally, relief seemed to wash over him, filling his eyes with a joy so strong it made her heart flutter. When he buried his face in her hair, the tune he hummed just for her rumbled out of his chest and into her body.
“I am going to take such good care of you.” His voice dropped, turning husky in her ear. “You will want for nothing, I promise.”
Selma laughed and let go of his waist to press against his chest when his hands began sliding down her body in a rather familiar way.
“Really? This makes you horny? I practically had to rape you when we were at the hotel, but now—in the middle of nowhere, after I tell you I’m pregnant, you suddenly want it? I thought I smelled bad.”
“You stink. I don’t care.”
It was pretty impossible to hold back the smile pulling at her lips at his sudden change. She hadn’t seen him like this before—unrestrained, yet still in control. It made her chest feel light.
“I’m not having sex with you right now. There’s too much to discuss. Like what do we do now? This wasn’t exactly in the plan.”
He rubbed at her hips with his thumbs, the gesture still suggestive, though he kept his palms still. “Now you come back with me.”
“And then what?” She frowned, trying to wrap her head around the crazy turn this evening had taken.
A few hours ago she’d thought she would be saying goodbye to him forever, and now here they were, on a road in the middle of nowhere discussing their futures.
“No offense, but I’m not about to raise a kid in a penthouse on top of a casino. ”
His soft lips quirked in a smile. “No? And where would you prefer to build a nest, my little mate?”
“Nest? I was more thinking a house. You know, in the country. With fresh air and…” She blushed when the damned picket fence popped into the forefront of her mind again.
“And?” he asked, eyebrows lifted in amusement. “If you want it, it’s yours.”
“We can talk about that later. I… I also want you to meet my parents, and preferably make such a good impression that they don’t think you’re in the modern slave trade and have brainwashed and/or abused me while I’ve been missing for the past two months. They’ve got to be worried sick.”
“Hmm,” he said, the amusement withering on his face.
“What?”
“Breeders usually don’t keep in contact with their human relations. It’s… too complicated.”
Selma arched her brows until they met her hairline. “Too complicated? You mean because the poor woman has to explain to her family why she’s suddenly not allowed to be farther than three feet from her new boyfriend?”
Kain looked distinctly uncomfortable. “That and the lack of aging, along with a few other… issues.”
“Kain, I’m going to see my parents. They’ve been through enough because of my condition. I’m not just going to disappear.”
Though his expression remained grim, he nodded. “We will find a way. I suppose I will have to officially introduce you to my family too, once we’ve settled in a bit.”
The prospect did not seem to please him, but given his upbringing, she didn’t really expect an uncomplicated relationship between him and his father and brother.
Selma leaned forward to rest her cheek against his chest, her eyes fluttering closed at the contact with his strong, warm form.
If she could help him heal, she would, not because of Bealith’s plan to break the darkness within the demon world, but because he deserved the care and tenderness his mother had denied him.
Kain stroked her hair in a gentle caress. “Come, little one. Let’s get you home.”