Chapter Six #2
He recognized it. He hadn’t looked at it very well when he’d been here right after Celeste had disappeared, and he couldn’t see much since it was dark, but it was cute and very Dermot-like.
It was unassuming, but Bastien was ready to bet that inside was a completely different story.
Dermot hadn’t been living here that long, but from the yard, it was clear that he’d already made the place his.
“You don’t have to decide now where you want to sleep,” Dermot said as he opened the door. “If you want the bed, I can sleep on the couch.”
“I thought we needed to talk, yet here you are, already trying to get me into your bed,” Bastien teased.
It was worth it to see the pink rise on Dermot’s cheeks. It made Bastien wonder if Dermot also got pink on his chest, and he suspected he might find out tonight.
But first, they did need to talk.
“I’m not trying to get you into my bed,” Dermot argued. “I’m just telling you that if you don’t want to spend the night on the couch, you’re welcome to use my bed. We don’t have to share or anything. I know that you’re still angry at me.”
Bastien sighed. He looked around, wondering if it would be better to do this in the living room or in the kitchen.
He didn’t know where the kitchen was, but he could see the couch from the entrance, so he grabbed Dermot’s hand and dragged him that way.
He smiled when Dermot squeaked but followed him without arguing.
“Let’s talk,” he said, pushing Dermot down onto the couch.
“I appreciate the fact that you’ve apologized and admitted you were wrong about my sister.
I’m not sure you were wrong about Rose, but that’s something we might never find out.
I don’t know if she’ll be back, and frankly, I don’t care.
Even though she did what she did because Parrish had threatened her son, as sorry as I feel for her, it doesn’t mean I’ll forgive her.
She took my sister and handed her back to the man who’d tortured her for years and who’s going to do it again and again. ”
Bastien paused and licked his lips. He was trying very hard not to think about what was happening to Celeste right now. If he did, it made him want to scream and cry at the same time, and possibly to go out there and try to find her.
He wouldn’t. Parrish was too smart. He also wouldn’t kill Celeste, which was a good thing, but Bastien wondered how much pain Parrish could inflict on her anyway. Probably too much, which meant that Bastien needed to find her as soon as possible.
He was lucky not to be doing this on his own, but he wasn’t sure it would be enough, anyway.
He wanted to think so, especially now that he and Dermot were finally clearing things up.
If there was truth to the saying that mates met each other when they most needed it, then Bastien hoped it meant that Dermot would be instrumental in getting Celeste back.
“I don’t think she expects you to forgive her, or that she expects Celeste to,” Dermot said. “But I understand why she did it. We can blame her while still feeling for her.”
“I don’t want to talk about Rose right now.”
“What do you want to talk about, then?” Dermot’s voice trembled slightly.
Bastien flopped down on the couch next to him. They were close, their sides pressed together, and Bastien enjoyed it. He’d wanted this type of closeness from the beginning, but Dermot hadn’t. He’d been the one to put space between them.
Not tonight.
It was clear that whatever had been going on in Dermot’s mind, it was gone.
He’d broken through the worry and the wariness, which was exactly what Bastien had wanted.
He wished it hadn’t come at the cost of his sister, but none of that was Dermot’s fault, even though he clearly blamed himself for it.
Bastien reached over to take Dermot’s hand.
Dermot was startled, but he didn’t pull away, and Bastien took advantage of that, linking their fingers together.
He squeezed, then tried to find the right words.
“I understand what you’ve been through. I understand why you felt the need to trust Rose as much as you did and to advocate for her.
In the end, she really did need our help.
It’s unfortunate that she didn’t tell us her entire story, but I understand why she didn’t.
I don’t blame you for what happened, though. ”
“How can you not? It’s my fault she was taken.”
“It’s not. It’s Rose’s fault. I know you insisted on Rowan and Clay letting her in, but I’m pretty sure they would have even if you hadn’t.
They’re the kind of people who want to help, and she clearly needs that help.
Besides, I find the way you reacted sweet.
I’d want someone like you to advocate for my sister if she’d been in Rose’s place. Hell, she has been in Rose’s place.”
“I didn’t want her in the village. I don’t know why you’re trying to paint me as better than I am, but you should stop.”
“I’m not trying to do anything,” Bastien said as he shook his head.
“I see you. I saw what you did and how you behaved with my sister. I know that you don’t like her, and I even understand why.
Like a lot of people, you lost your clan to Kudlak.
She’s bonded to a Kudlak, so of course you’re wary of her.
She doesn’t have the advantage of the friendship you and Tamsin share.
Even though you don’t trust Tamsin’s mate, you know Tamsin, and you know he won’t ever hurt you. The same can’t be said for Celeste.”
“I know she won’t hurt me. She wouldn’t hurt a fly,” Dermot muttered. “I would have seen that right away if I’d given her a chance, but I didn’t. I let what I thought about Kudlak taint the way I saw her.”
“And you probably weren’t completely wrong.
We know that Parrish is using her and her magic.
We knew that was what he’d do as soon as he got his hands back on her.
But you have to understand that my sister isn’t defined by her mate.
He’s mistreated her and has hurt her for years.
As much as she wanted to leave, he’s her mate, and I’m sure that even though you and I aren’t bonded yet, you can feel how strong the pull is sometimes. ”
Dermot wiggled on the couch, which told Bastien that he knew exactly what Bastien was talking about.
Good. Bastien wanted Dermot to understand, but at the same time, their relationship didn’t have anything to do with Celeste.
“I don’t really care if you don’t like my sister,” he continued. “I just need you to accept her once she’s back. You’re my mate, and she’s my family. I can’t choose between the two of you. I don’t want to have to, and you shouldn’t ask that of me.”
“I won’t,” Dermot promised. “I can admit when I’m wrong. I know that Celeste doesn’t want to be with Parrish and that he’s forcing her to be there. We’ll get her back.”
“I hope so.” Bastien swallowed. This was the complicated part.
“I know that, considering everything, now isn’t the best moment for us to get into a relationship, even though we’re mates.
I understand if you said no or wanted more space and time, but I’m alone here, Dermot.
I don’t know where my sister is, and I’m not planning on going back to my family.
Besides, you’re here, so how could I leave? ”
“You’re saying you don’t want to leave because I’m here?”
“I’m saying that I don’t want to leave because you’re my mate and I want to be with you, even though now isn’t the right moment. I don’t think we’ll ever have a right moment. We’ll have a moment that we make right, and I hope that moment is tonight.”
* * * *
DERMOT DIDN’T KNOW what to say. He’d thought about this moment happening, but he hadn’t allowed himself to hope.
Why would Bastien want to be with him after what happened with Celeste?
Even if he did, Dermot had expected him to want to wait until Celeste was back.
He’d wondered about that, because they couldn’t know how long it would take for them to find Celeste and defeat Parrish, but he’d been willing to wait.
Bastien wasn’t just a guy. He was Dermot’s mate, and even though Dermot had tried to resist, that mattered.
He hadn’t wanted a Krsnik as his mate. It had unsettled him, and if he was honest with himself, he wasn’t sure he’d fully made peace with it even now.
Part of him was terrified that Bastien was going to change his mind and abandon him the way the Krsniks he’d grown up with had abandoned him when he needed them the most.
Dermot had a choice to make. He could allow his fear to rule him and put itself between him and Bastien, or he could kick it to the curb and focus on his future.
That future would involve Celeste. There was no way around that, but now that Dermot had accepted that Celeste wasn’t the monster he’d made her out to be, it felt easier.
He still didn’t like that she was bonded to a Kudlak, but he could understand why she’d agreed to it.
Right now, he would agree to bond with Bastien, too, just like Clay and Rowan had bonded, or Tamsin and Nico.
There was no way to know what the future would be like, but Dermot could only trust the bond.
That bond was pulling him toward Bastien, just like the bond between Celeste and Parrish would’ve pulled her toward him. She could have tried to resist, but why should she have? She hadn’t known the kind of person Parrish was. She did now, and she wanted out, and that was what mattered.
“Dermot?” Bastien asked. He didn’t sound worried. He sounded patient, as if he knew that Dermot needed a moment.
He wasn’t wrong. Dermot’s mouth was dry. He had a dozen questions, but he wasn’t sure where to start. “When you say that you hope that moment is now,” he said slowly. “What do you mean exactly?”