Chapter 23
Twenty-Three
When I wake up on Tuesday, my phone is full of voicemails from Sam. I’m not in the mood to deal with it. I ignore them. By Wednesday morning, my mailbox is full. I’m so busy, however, I don’t have time to dwell on them. We’re on a deadline. I have until Friday to finish all my work.
I arrive home after midnight for the third night in a row.
Or rather, early Thursday morning. The couch has become my refuge when I walk in the door.
I’m too exhausted to make it to my bed. My phone chimes.
I ignore it. It chimes a second time. My eyes open.
I groan. It’s probably Liz asking if I’ve made it home.
I’ve forgotten that I was supposed to text her that I made it home. Where’s my bag?
Sitting up, I pad over to the door, and reach my hand inside the bag until it feels the smooth surface of the phone’s screen. “Gotcha.”
Pulling it out, I unlock the device. To my surprise, both Liz and Sam have messaged me. First, I answer Liz.
Liz
Home?
Min
Yes, safe and sound.
Liz
Okay. Good night.
I consider ignoring and even deleting the one from Sam, but the soft side of me decides to at least read what it says. I don’t have to reply to it now. I slide open his name and read.
Sam
I’m sorry to bother you. I know you’re mad at me, but I didn’t know who else to contact. I need your help. Please call me as soon as you can.
I’m immediately awake. The tiredness from a few moments ago is gone and replaced by fear. Something’s up. I can practically hear the desperation in his text. Sam isn’t the type of person who’d send me a message like that just to talk to me.
If he’s asking for help, it’s an emergency type of situation. No matter how I feel toward him right now, I shove all emotions aside. That’s when it hits me. If he needs me, I’ll be there for him. One, because that’s what decent human beings do, and two, because I want to be there.
I locate his name in my contacts and tap it. The phone rings a few times. My heart is pounding against my ribs. I hold my breath.
“Minerva? Thank goodness. Just a moment.” His voice is raspy, raw, and low. A door opens and closes. “First off, I’m sorry for everything. I . . . I just don’t know what to do.”
“Sam? What’s wrong?”
“It’s my youngest sister, Celine. She showed up at the entry gate to the barracks about three hours ago.
Every time I try and ask her what’s wrong, she just shakes her head and cries harder and clings to me.
She finally fell asleep about fifteen minutes ago.
I don’t know how to help her.” Sam’s voice cracks.
I take a deep breath and mentally start running through a checklist of sorts. “How is your other sister, Sarah?”
“She’s at school. She had no idea anything was off with Celine until I rang her.”
“Okay, what about your father? Celine’s parents?”
“My dad is in the dark. I don’t know about my mum or Celine’s dad. They’re not picking up their mobiles.”
“Okay.” I pace the room. “What about her school?”
“They had no idea she was missing. For whatever reason she did this, she said nothing to anyone, even her friends.”
I swallow hard. My voice grows small. “Do you think someone might’ve hurt her?”
“No!” Sam answers quickly. His voice grows in volume. “I made sure that was the one question she answered.”
“Okay,” I say for the third time.
“Sam, where are you?” I hear a young girl’s voice shouting.
“I’ll be right there, poppet.” He clears his throat.
“Min, you’re the one person I could think of who could offer me sound advice.
My corporal said I could take all the time I needed to sort this out, but there is no way Celine can stay here.
The male dorm rooms in a military barracks are the worst possible place for a young girl. What should I do?”
“I agree, she can’t stay there.” It’s clear to me that there is only one possible solution. Especially this late at night. “Bring her here. You both can stay with me as long as you need.”
“Are you sure, Min? I don’t want to cause you any extra stress.”
“Positive. Otherwise, I wouldn’t offer. This is an extenuating circumstance. Celine shouldn’t have to suffer because there are problems between us.”
“Thank you, Min. You have no idea how much of a relief it is. I considered trying to book us into a hotel, but I couldn’t find a halfway decent location at an affordable rate on such late notice.”
“I know, it’s crazy isn’t it. Rooms are like two hundred quid a night.” I start toward Liz’s former room, now the spare bedroom. There are some boxes in the corner I’ll need to move, but at least the sheets are clean. “Has she eaten? Did she bring anything with her? Like clothes?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Sam?” Celine calls out.
“I’m coming!”
“Let’s assume she hasn’t eaten. If I were you, I’d feed her, then let her sleep. You guys can come over anytime. You can eat whatever is in the fridge. I’ll leave the door unlocked. If it’s after nine, and I’m at work, look under my doormat for the spare key. Now go to her.”
“I will. And thank you again. I mean it. You’re a lifesaver.”
I lower the phone from my ear, but the device hasn’t disconnected. Sam must’ve dropped it into his pocket.
“Sam? I was worried you’d left me,” Celine says.
“I’m not going anywhere, little one. You know that. We’ve talked about this.” Sam’s voice is so tender. I know I should hang up, but I’m also morbidly fascinated by how he’s going to handle this. “Are you finally up for talking? I’ve been worried sick about you.”
“No. I don’t want to.”
“You'll have to eventually, but not now. How about food? When was the last meal you’ve eaten?”
“I don’t remember. Um . . . I had lunch.”
“You need food. Now.” He sighs. “The food hall is closed. I don’t have anything in here, so I guess that means we’re going out.”
“But it’s late.”
“I know, but I can’t let you go without eating dinner. What kind of brother would I be?”
“I don’t know? A mean one?” Celine muses.
“Hmm, we can’t have that.” I hear the rustling of fabric. “You obviously don’t have a coat, so put this on.”
“Are we really going out?”
“Yes.”
“Where? Aren’t all the shops closed?”
“Probably, but we’re not going to a shop.”
“Oh. Where are you taking me?”
“To a friend’s flat.”
“What kind of a friend?” Celine sniggers.
“A girlfriend,” Sam admits. “I mean, er, a girl who is a friend.”
“You’re lying. Otherwise, your face wouldn’t be turning bright red. She’s more than friend, isn’t she!” Her voice is laced with excitement.
I chuckle to myself.
“I’ve never been able to keep secrets from you and your sister,” he grumbles. “You two pick up on everything.”
“I knew it!” she boasts. “What’s her name? Why didn’t tell Sarah and me? Do you think she’ll like us?”
“Celine, calm down.” Sam sighs. “Minerva. Because you two can’t keep secrets. And yes, she’ll love you.”
“Have you kissed?”
“So many questions, but if it keeps you talking, then I suppose I’ll just have to keep answering them.”
“I can’t help it,” Celine whines. “You’ve never had a girlfriend before. I’m curious.”
“I have too. You and Sarah have never picked up on it. You were too young.”
“Why are you telling me now?”
“Because Minerva is special. You’re going to fall in love her just like I am.”
“You’re falling in love her?”
“I am.” His voice becomes so low that I almost miss hearing him add, “I didn’t know how much until I mucked everything up.”
I fall back against the couch. He loves me? My heart flutters. It’s like whipping out a sequence of thirty-two fouettés. I must’ve missed all the signs, because from the way he’s been acting recently, it doesn’t seem like love to me.
“Brother, what did you do?”
“I was a stupid-head as you like to say.”
“I haven’t said that since I was like eight years old!”
I disconnect from the call. I don’t want him to know that I’ve heard him just admit to his sister he loves me. My gaze travels around the room to the chocolate box and bouquet of blue and purple hyacinths. Do I feel the same way about him?
I close my eyes and relive some of the dates and outings we’ve been on.
I see dinner at pub, making pancakes with him, seeing him perform magic at the Tank, touring the stables, and the rooftop kiss.
I recall when I butt dialed him and wasn’t sure about taking a ballet class and how he jumped into a taxi to meet me as the combat ballerina.
In each of these instances, when we were together, we had good chemistry.
Every time I saw his face, I’d smile, and my body would be consumed with excitement.
Going back to more recent events, however, I’m reminded by the fact that the little time we’ve been able to spend together has been rather one-sided.
Sam’s become forgetful and has let his work become his top priority.
I was sick and tired of being second fiddle.
I snapped and told him exactly how I felt before cutting him off.
Tonight, my head is clearer. I realize that I reacted in a way that wasn’t fair to Sam.
I should’ve told him how I’ve been feeling all along instead of holding everything in.
When Sam called me tonight, my heart yearned to be there for him.
I still feel a strong pull toward him and like him.
A lot. But I don’t know if those feelings are strong enough to be considered love.
How does a person who’s in love feel? I mean, I love my family and I love my friends, but I don’t know what loving a guy is supposed to feel like. I’ve never been in love before. Is it one of those things where when you know, you just know?
My phone lights up.
Sam
Celine is hyper and hungry. I just wanted to warn you that we are planning to head over to your flat now. We’ll be as quiet as possible so you can rest.
Min
Appreciate it, but I’m wide awake.
Sam
I’m sorry.
I ignore this and continue.
Min
Does she have any food allergies?
Sam
No. She’ll eat anything.
Min
Okay, I’ll whip up some pancakes. Are you going to be hungry too?
Sam
I’m fine, but if you have an extra one or two, I wouldn’t mind a snack.
Min
Noted. See you soon.
Sam
*Thumbs-up emoji.*