20. Crimson
crimson
. . .
He slid into bed behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. I felt the graze of his fingertips on my hip, then the weight of his bare chest pressing against my back. His dick was already hard, thick, and pulsing against me.
He trailed his fingers along my thigh, then slipped them inside my panties. I shuddered as he gently stroked my swollen nub. His lips landed on my neck and I closed my eyes, feeling his tongue flicking on my spot.
Instant waterfalls.
“Wet as fuck,” he whispered as my juices coated his fingers. “Open up, bae.”
I obeyed, lifting my right leg just enough, and I heard a small tear in my panties as he entered me from the side.
A low groan rumbled in his throat when he slid his dick in, stretching me open. My leg rested over his, anchoring me to him. I felt everything, the teasing of his first thrust, followed by the deep roll of his hips as he pushed in again, intentionally deeper this time.
I arched my back instinctively, pushing against him, desperate for more.
He read my body and slid his hand up under my tank top, cupping my breast, thumb circling my nipple until it pebbled against his touch.
Jah’s other hand made its way between my thighs, rubbing slow, sensual circles on my clit while he moved inside me.
The sensation of his fingers and his deep strokes overwhelmed me.
I removed his hand and clenched my thighs together, trying to catch my breath.
He slid his hand up to my neck and said,
“Put it back.”
My hand covered his as I dragged it back down my body, placing him between my thighs once again. His breath hitched as he rocked into me harder. Restraint slipped. His soft nibbles turned into bites. He gripped my waist tighter and began driving into me, every stroke deeper, rougher.
“Pussy milking my dick, Red,” he growled low against my ear. “You ready to come, baby?”
“Mm… yes,” I whispered, careful not to wake Scarlett.
“Do that shit. Ain’t no holding back.”
“Jah,” I breathed, submitting to complete bliss. My body obeyed his request, causing an orgasm that hit me like a wave. I screamed loud enough that I buried my face in the pillow, moaning uncontrollably as he kept delivering steady, lethal strokes.
Moments later, his body tensed and he released deep inside me. He kissed the back of my neck, soft and lingering. I turned to face him, laying my head on his sweaty chest. His arm stayed around me, holding me there. We stayed like that.
Skin to skin.
Breath to breath.
No words.
Just a quiet understanding.
Seeing Auntie Ruby was clarifying. I wasn't worked up, uncomfortable, or nothing. I guess that is what it meant to be at peace. I wanted to feel that way overall, which is why, after dodging Venus’s phone calls for a few days, I finally agreed to meet with her.
I knew she wanted to give another apology, but truthfully, I didn't need it.
I just wanted to stare her in her face, let her know I didn't give a damn about the past, and that I was only moving toward the future.
I didn't tell Jahsir I was meeting her. We'd spent the entire morning making love, and I didn't want to ruin that.
Besides, I begged him not to leave the other day, and he did.
I didn't ask any questions; I didn't need to.
I knew he handled business, and sooner or later, it would be plastered all over the news.
The thought of Scarlett's biological father being dead left a weird feeling within me.
He betrayed me in the worst ways, and if he was really gone, I'd never know why.
Perhaps that's why I was taking this meeting with Venus.
On one hand, I wanted nothing from her, but on the other, maybe a small part of me wanted real answers.
Either way, telling Jahsir where I was going would derail the whole plan, so I didn't. I made him a quick breakfast while he played with Scarlett.
Then I got dressed and headed out, stopping to drop Scarlett off to Zahara in the process.
Afterwards, I met Venus at the smoothie bar. She was late, of course, so I sat, people watching. I'd just fixated on a couple who looked like they had just come back from a jog, when Venus breezed in. She was fashionable as always, commanding attention as she pranced through the tiny shop.
We greeted each other, and when she reached out for a hug, I declined, causing an embarrassed look to stretch across her face. She shook it off, then proceeded with her attempt at small talk.
“How’s Scarlett? She’s so beautiful, growing up quickly.”
“She’s great,” I smiled. “I can already tell her personality will be something else. She’s very feisty.”
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
Venus fidgeted with her fingers, looking around the smoothie shop. I was annoyed because she asked me to be here, not the other way around. The least she could do was keep the conversation flowing. Fed up with the silence, I finally asked, “Venus. Why am I here?”
“I guess we are jumping right to business, huh?” She replied.
“Guess so.” I sighed impatiently.
“Well, Crim, we’ve been through a lot, and I just really wanted to apologize without an audience. I didn’t want this conversation to go left.”
Crossing my arms, I leaned back in my chair. “My mama always said wherever you cut up is where I’mma whoop your butt at. I remember it clear as day. I threw a tantrum at Family Dollar, and she tore me up. I mean, belt swinging, knocking over the shit that was on the shelves.”
“Crim?” She asked, probably wondering where I was going with my impromptu story.
“Basically, Venus, you embarrassed me in front of everybody. So, your apology should be just as loud as your disrespect.”
“I’m sorry, Crim. Really.”
“What exactly are you sorry for? You called yourself making amends once I got my shop, then showed up to my grand opening on more bullshit. Quite honestly, I really shouldn’t be here now. When I say you can’t be trusted, I mean that wholeheartedly. So again, what are you sorry for?”
“Everything. I get it now. You just wanted loyalty. You were dealing with so much when Jahsir left. And I- I was selfish. Backing Rashad up when he decided to leave you off the call list. All of it. And I know I shouldn’t have brought up the baby daddy secret, although you did say I had secrets, too! ”
“Secrets I never spilled because I knew what the outcome would have been. If Rashad ever found out you gave his mama drugs to deal with him being locked up, he’d surely kill you himself.
I didn’t need to say anything; I shut that shit down myself.
Actually, in hindsight, that should have been the first red flag that you wasn’t shit. ”
“I know I messed up.”
I stayed quiet and let her sit in her regret. Most people only apologized to clear their conscience. I wasn’t going to nod, smile, and immediately accept her apology so she could feel better. Instead, I continued to sit in silence.
“You thought I was solid, I mean, I am, but-”
“You weren’t solid, but it’s cool, Venus. I promise, I’m not mad.” I emphasized. “I’ve got too much to be thankful for: my beautiful daughter and Jahsir, who's an amazing man. I’m not holding onto grudges. It’s time to move on, and you should do the same.”
“That’s actually why I wanted to meet. I came to say goodbye. I took a travel nursing contract. I’ll be leaving Mulholland Falls by the end of the week.”
“Mmh. Well. Good for you,” I stated dryly. Because, girl, I really don’t care. I’m just playing nice. “Nothing wrong with a fresh start.”
“Yeah, and I need one.”
The waiter finally dropped our drinks off. I sipped mine slowly, watching her stir hers like she couldn’t get comfortable in her own skin. Then, for whatever reason, she took off her sunglasses. That’s when I saw the bruise. A deep, swollen ring around her eye, most of it covered in makeup.
“Girl!” I gasped at the ugly gash. “Who did that to you?”
“...Rashad,” she blurted out
“Bye, Venus.” I scoffed, standing to my feet.
“Crim, wait, please don’t leave.” She urged, taking my hand. I sat back down and stared at her.
“If you gone keep lying, I’mma leave because my cousin would never lay hands on a woman.”
“But he did!” She lied more urgently. “He got mad when I brought up the bank,” she said quietly. “The Brinks truck hit. From years ago.”
“What does something that happened years ago have to do with now? And why are you speaking so freely about this?” I leaned in, whispering and squinting my eyes at her.
“Because, Crim, he said I was lying, but you know the truth, Rashad, Jahsir, and Dro did that shit. Rashad even told me who actually shot Dro, said Jah planned the whole thing.”
My stomach turned at her tone. She was speaking as if she was reading from a script, and then I noticed it. My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. “Venus, no.” I choked out. The buttons on her shirt were uneven, giving me a glimpse of the wire underneath it. “Venus, a wi…wire.”
She opened her mouth, but nothing came out.
Before I could fully process what was happening, I grabbed my smoothie and threw it dead in her face.
Green splashed across her eyes, soaking her shirt.
She stood pleading for my forgiveness, but I heard nothing.
Instead, I stood up, flipping my chair back in the process.
I yanked her across the table, firmly wrapping my hands in her hair, then started swinging on her.
Venus grabbed my hair and was able to maneuver out of the hold I had on her and stated,
“I’m sorry, Crim.”
People were shouting. A waiter yelled. Someone pulled out a phone, but I didn’t care.
I shoved her back into the table, causing the smoothie glasses to roll onto the floor.
I landed a couple more punches to her face until I was yanked off of her.
It took two waiters to pull me off her. My chest was heaving as I heard a manager threaten to call the police.
I started to curse the manager out as well until I heard a buzzing noise.
It got louder and louder, then I froze. It wasn’t my phone, but it was .
It was the phone Jahsir gave me, and I knew exactly what the buzzing meant.
“No. No, no, no…” I panicked, dropping to my knees and emptying my purse. With broken nails and bleeding fingers, I started pushing everything aside. Snacks for Scarlett, my gloss, tampons, and a wallet were all pushed aside until I found the phone. Still vibrating, suffocating me with each buzz.
“Only time I’ll ever call this, Crim,” he’d said months ago, slipping it into my hand. “If you hear it ring, don’t answer. Just know I had to go. It means the police are on me. They close. Real close.”
I couldn’t move. I couldn’t breathe. The noise of the café disappeared, along with everyone in it.
The only thing I heard was Jahsir’s words to me that night.
Fear rushed into my heart as I stared at the screen.
No caller ID. No second chances. No goodbye.
No see you later. Nothing. My hands trembled as I clutched the phone to my chest. Tears spilled from my eyes while I gathered my things and stood to my feet.
There was nothing left to say, nothing that would change my reality, and it was my fault.
The Feds were no longer watching; they were here.
They were already close.
And Jah and I were out of time.