Chapter 23
THE SECOND SUMMER, FOURTEEN YEARS AGO
It felt like every single resident of Mercy Island had descended upon Birdsong.
Motown blasted through the speakers brought by the Rucker brothers (two charming idiots around Didion’s and Sammie’s age), countless casseroles were being set on the ever-lengthening line of collapsible tables that had been dusted off from garages and then draped in plastic tablecloths.
Some of the men had hobbled in holding each side of a heavy keg and put it in a plastic tub and filled it with ice.
There were more buns than could ever possibly be needed.
Local restaurant owners Dusty and JJ were arguing about who made the best burger—both sounding so angry that anyone who didn’t know them (Dusty with a loud voice, JJ the town’s lovable grump) would think it might come to blows. But it wouldn’t. It never did.
A group of middle-aged women in conservative bathing suits and visors lay under the sun drinking iced tea (spiked or not, no one knew—but they knew).
The island’s children were running around so fast no one could keep track of them, but that was fine, because no one was trying to.
Going just as unnoticed was the group of gangly teenagers lingering near the cooler that held cans of beer and bottles of fruity, boozy spritzes.
Austin walked right up to the cooler and took out a can of Mercy pilsner and something pink for Didion, winking at her as he inconspicuously headed toward the ocean.
She was giggly as she half ran behind him to keep up.
After spending the entire first summer hanging out, undeniably flirting, Didion spent her sophomore year back in Charleston, unable to do anything but think about Austin James.
It made all of her stepmother’s rules tolerable.
She was indifferent to the guys around her, which made them more interested.
Every night, she fell asleep thinking about Austin.
Not even the real him, sometimes, just the idea of him.
Daydreaming about what it would be like to have his arms around her at a bonfire like the one the night they met, to have everyone there know they were together.
If he called her his girl, if he liked her back.
If he said he loved her. If they had babies.
Ridiculous, as he hadn’t even said he liked her like that yet.
She had been certain the real him would pale in comparison when she returned.
Maybe he wouldn’t even care about seeing her.
But just two days after arriving, she was on her way to the secondhand bookstore when he drove his new (old) truck by her, then, cool as could be, honked, and said, Hey, you look like a girl I used to know.
Austin was busy all the time. He took tennis more seriously than anyone her age took anything.
But whenever he had a free moment, it seemed he spent it with her.
It would be just before dinner or maybe the blazing afternoon, and she’d hear his truck pull in over the gravel out front, and her heart would light up.
Matt was back for the summer again, which meant the four of them were now constantly together.
Eating hot dogs on the porch, playing lawn games at dusk, listening to records in the living room on rainy days, and riding the transition from childhood to adulthood by confessing past embarrassments and sharing future dreams.
Tonight, Didion had a feeling it might be the first time Austin would kiss her. She had even picked an outfit with that in mind. She wanted to be dressed right for the occasion, that’s how sure she was that her gut feeling was right.
That night, the sun set as the kids hid beer bottles under their tented legs, buried into the sand, chatting and laughing and screaming about nothing the way only teenagers can do.
When the purple-and-gold sunset gave way to the navy blue night sky, Mr. Kelly went out on his fishing boat and lit off an exorbitant number of fireworks there’s no way he legally was in possession of.
Sammie and Matt took the opportunity to go steal more booze, leaving Austin and Didion alone.
They leaned back in the sand, propped up by their hands, staring up at the fireworks. Didion was smiling at the sight of her favorite ones, the shimmering gold kind that looked like glitter, when Austin said, “Hey.”
She turned to him, a burst of green light in the sky casting a brief glow on his face. Her body felt like jelly. His gaze dipped to her lips and then he glanced behind them in the direction of the house.
He put his arm around her, lifted her chin, and kissed her.
Austin tasted like salt and beer and something sweet.
His fingers were calloused against her skin, his touch gentle.
His kiss was soft at first, but as they breathed into it, passion started to grow, and Didion suddenly wanted to copy every movie she’d ever seen and tear his clothes off.
What she’d do then, she wasn’t exactly sure.
They heard Sammie’s voice carry on the wind and broke apart.
When she and Matt plunked down on the sand again next to them, they acted none the wiser.
But in the darkness, Austin held Didion’s hand, and when she looked at her sister, Didion saw the hint of knowing in Sammie’s eyes.
They were going to talk about it later, and probably all night long.
It’s not every day you have your first kiss.