55. One Sacrifice to Live Another Day
One Sacrifice to Live Another Day
Aradia
Death.
She always thought it was going to be a welcoming moment.
One of old age and a long life lived. Surrounded by family and friends, sharing one last story.
She would go peacefully in her sleep and be welcomed into Cybelle’s blinding lights, and golden streets.
Instead, it was an endless space of darkness and echoing quiet.
Thump.
Ukoron had won. Thousands had died and it was all her fault. Useless. Disappointing. A failure. It was everything she was. Everything she died as.
Died.
Yes, that’s right. I’m dead.
Thump.
Rae’s face haunted her in her last moments. But nothing had been as debilitating as the anger of her ancestors. Her mother. Aradia’s inept decisions and insignificant life had unleashed chaos and doomed Peraynia. Was this why she was being punished?
In death there were no gilded homes, or loved ones dripping in opulence, awaiting with open arms. There was no laughter or excited tears of union.
No rivers of honey, or warm caressing wind.
Not for her. What magnificent views could be hiding within her murky darkness effectuating her very existence.
There was nothing. She was nothing. Definite and alone.
Thump.
She deserved this.
Thump.
Didn’t she? Her darkness was like being crushed by the deepest parts of the ocean, unending and harrowing. What she would do for just a glimpse of sun to pierce through the waves of cessation.
Thump ...
Could it be possible to manifest light? If this was her afterlife, could she control it? The eternal cold enveloping her didn’t seem as bone-chilling as before. In fact, it felt as if she had floated above a fire.
Ah, how I miss the warmth. How I miss … you.
Thump … thump.
She stretched out within the empty space of her mind, searching. Praying to find familiar warmth once more. Hunting for her glimpse of sun. The darkness wasn’t so dark anymore. She remembered what it was like to breathe, to smile, to run. Gods, she would never take advantage of it again.
Thump ... thump.
Warmth spread like wildfire, cracking against the darkness like Fintan’s lightning.
Fintan.
Thump. Thump.
She was pulled through a vortex of nothing. Her thoughts spinning and memories flashing before her in an epileptic pattern of black and white. An airy laughter over crackling fire.
Cahira.
Thump, thump.
Snow-peaked mountains, gushing waterfalls, and a winter air that bruised and bit into her face. The Western Wastelands.
Rhydar.
Thump, Thump.
A midnight sky vacant of starlight. Cautious eyes and rare happiness.
Jasper.
Thump, thump.
The warmth — there! She leaned into it, clinging onto the feeling. There was safety within it. There was love.
Kaiden.
Thump, thump. Thump, thump.
Kaiden. A fire roared to life, spreading to every corner and pushing back the shadows of her mind. More and more. Faster and faster. Her fingers twitched, her skin burned and she swallowed the copper tang of blood. Movement. She was moving.
Aradia.
The word echoed through her. Permeating her soul and ripping her from the afterlife.
As if a heavy blanket lifted, her senses returned.
Pain in copious amounts shocked her body, then her mind.
Her lungs burned with their desperate desire for air.
The atmosphere around her became more and more light.
The pressure behind her eyes built until darkness was a distant thought pushed behind a searing light. Her leaden lungs fought against weak muscles.
Thump, thump, thump, thump!
She jerked as air fed her heaving lungs and beating heart, and with the movement, her eyelids opened.
A new darkness welcomed her. This one was full of low-lit candles and a starry night.
Cold wind blew through an open tent and brushed the bed of fur she laid on against her arms. Human shadows cast by a campfire mirrored across her tent.
Low words and clamor of discord filled air.
There must be hundreds of voices. The copper taste remained along with the bitter ball of failure.
She could feel it all. She was alive.
“Welcome back.” A voice filled with fatigue and loss brought her attention to a form leaning into the shadows.
She would know him anywhere. Amidst confusion or chaos, in darkness or light. She would know his voice as if it was her own.
A cracked and broken whimper escaped her lips. “We lost.”
Kaiden stepped into the light and Aradia’s heart dropped at the sight of him.
Gods, did he die too?
He was a husk of the man she knew. His strong gait was reduced to a deep limp.
Aradia tracked the motion to his right leg, which was in a rigid splint, leaving him unable to bend his knee.
Bandages wrapped around his arm and torso underneath a blue tunic.
It provided him with the illusion of the massive amount of weight he had lost. His narrow face was all sharp angles, and dark bruised circles underneath hollowed eyes.
She ached to sit up and reach out to him. To hold him as he undoubtedly fell apart. Her body was too weak, and aside from breathing and blinking, it took all her energy to even speak a few words.
“Kaiden.”
He reached the chair by her bed and sat down with a groan. Their gaze met and thousands of words flowed between them. Mainly one important fact. They had lost. How much? How many? Who?
Tears streamed down his blanched face. Haunted and weary. He licked his cracked lips as if to speak, but no words filled their empty tent.
She squeezed his hand lightly, giving him the only support she could.
A rattled sigh escaped him as he looked away. Pain flooded his face and his brows pulled down in a scowl. “You’ve been … gone … for two weeks.”
Dead. I’ve been dead for two weeks!
She swallowed down her fear.
“Ukoron,” Kaiden shook his head. A tear slid down his cheek but he wiped it away angrily.
Aradia squeezed his hand again. I’m here. I’m with you. She said with her actions.
Kaiden nodded. “Ukoron is somewhere in Peraynia. He tore the Veil completely down only three days after our … defeat. Chaos reigns the entire realm. Cahira,” his voice cracked as he turned his tear-filled eyes and met her gaze.
Aradia lost count of her heartbeat as sorrow froze time around her.
“Cahira is gone. She sacrificed herself to close the Gates of Qualan. She has not returned even when Ukoron reemerged.” The words rushed from his lips as if now spoken out loud, he could not stop them.
“Fintan is … broken. He’s lost in his grief and hatred.
Byron is dead, we haven’t found Rhydar, Jasper is still digging people from the rubble of my city and I —"
Aradia let the tears slip from the sides of her eyes. She stared at the top of the tent, preparing herself for what he said next.
“I gave my last ounce of magic in bringing you back to life. I– I have nothing but my sword and my wits, but even that is frail in the aftermath of what has happened. My people are homeless, kingless, and more vulnerable than ever.”
“No.” Aradia shook her head. “Not kingless.”
Kaiden scoffed. “There has never been a powerless Arkan king.”
She squeezed his hand once more, pulling his gaze to her.
“Your power,” She licked her lips and struggled to pronounce the words, “is your people. It is within your heart. The perseverance, loyalty, and strength comes from those around you and who you continue to fight for. Arkan is not a place, but it is its people, and you have saved them.”
Kaiden pinched the bridge of his nose and wiped his tears. “But was the loss worth it?” He glanced around them and hung his head. “Cahira?” It was a whisper — a plea of disbelief.
Aradia bit her lips to stop the sob. “She would not have been Cahira if she hadn’t sacrificed herself. We both know that.”
The tent was quiet except for the anguished cries of Kaiden. Aradia never let go of his hand in her silent support. Not until he had calmed and his labored breathing returned to normal.
“Sire!” A voice shouted from outside the tent. “You are needed.”
Kaiden stood slowly. His brows pulled down in focus. “I’ll be back.” He limped to the entrance.
“Kaiden,” her throat burned with the usage but she swallowed the pain. “Thank you.”
He turned his head with a sad smile, waiting.
“For bringing me back,” she added. “Your sacrifice, for me? I-I-”
“We all made sacrifices. But, I’d do it again without a second doubt.” Kaiden placed a hand against the tent entrance and Aradia noticed his signet ring was a void of dull red. “After all, it’s what you do when you love someone.” He disappeared behind the flap before she could respond.
Love.
He loved her.
Fresh tears flushed her face and she cracked a smile, finally admitting what she had known for weeks.
The feelings she had held back in fear of them not being returned, or worse, used against her.
The knowledge that he loved her and she loved him back.
Together, they would fight against Ukoron.
Yes, they had lost this battle with heart-wrenching defeats.
Within their sacrifices, they had survived to live another day and would continue to do so together.