Chapter 29
Corrine
“You guys,” I say, spinning the straw around in my drink, admiring the little bubbles that float to the surface around the straw, “he openly wept in my arms.”
Riley’s eyes widen slightly, and she looks sideways at Kaz, wondering how to respond best.
“He needs a come-to-Jesus talk. Or an intervention,” I say.
Riley nods, and Kaz reaches for a fry from our shared basket in the middle of the table.
“Would Sebastian make the guys do something like that with him?” Kaz asks Riley. At this point, we could send Xavier straight to rehab with flying colors. Any test would be sure to pick up the heavy presence of Xanax in his system. But that’s not going to be doing him any favors.
“I can talk to Sebastian,” Riley says, nodding. “Maybe Xavier just hasn’t gotten past the accident, but he’s too afraid to admit it.”
“Well, he admitted a fuck of a lot at my place that night! Saying he was miserable and worthless. If I didn’t feel bad for him, I’d be disgusted. I don’t like crying.” I laugh to make it seem like I’m kidding when I’m not, and Riley knows it.
“Corrine, you’re not the cut-throat bitch you try to make yourself out to be. Are you a little angst and reckless? Sure.” She looks sideways at Kaz and smiles. “But you’re also capable of love and compassion. Sometimes too much love and compassion.” She emphasizes the words ‘too much.’
“Where is this going? Is this a pep talk or a slut shaming?”
“Sorry,” she starts, regrouping. “You are amazing, and yes, Xavier's weakness is not something you enjoy managing, but I can see through your facade.”
“My facade?” I ask, incredulous.
Kaz pipes up, then, “You act like you don’t need anyone, but you do. You need Xavier, and he needs you. And it’s annoying that right now he needs you a lot more, but both of us,” she gestures to herself and Riley, “are sick of your back-and-forth internal monologue! We love you and want you to be happy. With your dude.”
“Xavier,” Riley affirms as if I’ve forgotten who we’re talking about.
I can’t help but tear up a bit, not because of the statement's truth but because they’re patient enough to watch me fumble in my feelings and try to help me figure it out.
“Okay,” I say slowly. “So what would you have me do now?”
“First off,” Riley points at my phone. “Respond to his text. You know he’s panicking, thinking you’ll never respond.”
I sigh. She’s probably right. I had told the girls that Xavier and I had gone back and forth this morning, and he’d left me with an important question. One that I wasn’t ready to answer until now: Can we try to start over?
I pause and then message him back:
Me: You never have to be embarrassed around me, Xavier. I understand this situation has been difficult. Of course, we can start over. See you tonight. ??
There. The truth shall set me free. At least, I hope it doesn’t fuck me over.