Chapter 7
ROSEMARY
Shooting upright, my breathing heavy, I stare around the room, my fist clutching at the sheet over my chest.
It takes me a moment to gather my bearings. To remember I’m not with Dominic anymore. The club, they came for me.
I should be thankful to them, a part of me is, but something about it all doesn’t sit well with me.
It was too easy. Dominic didn’t want to give me up.
I know it. I was winning, and he wanted me in his bed.
There’s no way he’d not fought back. I can feel it in my gut, and my dad always taught me to listen to my gut.
Remembering he’s here, Cobra’s here, it causes my chest to ache. I hadn’t seen them in years. I talked to them on the phone, yes, but only so often. Seeing them again, it makes me ache even more because though I don’t want to, I’ve missed them.
Very much so.
Then I think about what happened with Kevlar.
How gentle he’d been. How cool he was about everything.
Letting me cry in his arms. I’m not a crier.
I hate crying. Yet, in my weakest moment, I’d done just that in a man’s arms. That man being Kevlar.
A part of me wishes he were here now so I could curl into him and have him hold me as he did in the shower. Alas, I won’t do it.
I can’t.
Being in his arms felt good, and I refuse to go down that road.
I broke down once already, I won’t do it again.
Kevlar’s touch was soothing, and I didn’t want to get used to it only to have him take it away.
We shared one night together, that’s it.
It’s not like I’m his or anything like that.
I don’t want to think I can lean on him only for him to turn me away.
I mean, he was cool last night with everything, but I can’t trust it.
For that matter, I don’t know if I can trust any of them. As bad as it is to think it, they did find me, but why was I really taken in the first place?
Because of them? Because of my family? Or could it be because I’m good at being a boxer, a fighter?
I wish I knew the truth.
Sighing, I throw back the covers and get out of the ultra-soft bed.
When Jade showed me to the room, she stayed with me for a while, but only when she left me alone did I finally fall asleep.
I wasn’t used to people being near me constantly, and her being by me was somewhat nerve-racking.
I needed to be alone, not surrounded by people.
It’s why, after eating, I’d asked Jade to show me to the room she told me about. The thought of eating has my stomach rumbling.
I spot the boxes in the corner and see that Jade’s marked them with what’s in each one.
Moving to them, I open the top one that has clothes in it.
I pull out a pair of panties, a bra, and leggings.
I quickly put them on my naked body. I hate sleeping in clothes I always have, and last night was the first time in months I was able to do it. It was freeing.
I grab Kevlar’s hoodie, pull it over my bra, wrap my arms around myself for a moment, and inhale deeply smelling smoke and wood.
The smell reminds me of a campfire. I love it.
It reminds me of the owner of the hoodie.
I know I shouldn’t want to wear it, but it’s comforting.
I snag up the socks he gave me to wear and pull them on my feet before heading toward the door.
I glance down the hall, remembering which way Jade and I came. I’m only one room away from Kevlar’s. In the hall, it’s all I can do to not stop at his door and knock. Instead, I keep going, needing something to eat.
Thankfully, when I make it to the kitchen, I find myself alone and move toward the coffee pot and the sweet brewing aroma. It’s another of the luxuries I haven’t had in so long. I’m looking forward to finally having a cup again.
With my fingers wrapped around a mug, holding it close to my face, ready to take the first sip, I sit at the very same stool I sat on yesterday and sigh. I put the mug to my lips and drink some of the heavenly brew. Ambrosia is what this is. So good.
“She gone.”
I stiffen at the sound of panic in my best friend’s voice. She’s never been one to have a shrilly voice. Not even when . . . I shake my head, not wanting to go down that road.
“What are you talking about?” Kevlar demands harshly.
“Rosemary, she’s not in her room,” Jade answers, sounding nearly hysteric.
“Darlin’, did you only check her room? Anywhere else?” This is Viper speaking gentle-like to my best friend. He’s definitely a good guy, even though before everything, we got on each other’s nerves. But I know when it comes to my best friend, he’d kill for her. Hell, he’d die for her.
“No.” I don’t miss the hesitation in Jade’s voice, she jumped to conclusions, and that’s not her. “I didn’t think she’d be up so early. God, pregnancy is really getting to me. I’m sorry,” she says, shocking me.
“Jade, darlin’, nothing be sorry about, let’s just go find her. If I know her, she’s probably either in the kitchen or has found the gym,” Viper remarks.
At his mention of the gym, there’s no way to hide my flinch, though I’m glad no one is in the kitchen to see me do so. If I can help it, I’d like to avoid anything to do with a gym.
“I’ll check the kitchen,” Kevlar grumbles. “Since I’m up, I need some damn coffee myself.”
I guess he didn’t like being woken up by Jade’s panic. Then again, who would?
Hold on. Did she say she was pregnant? Holy shit.
That would explain the change in her. The way she freaked out.
It’s not like her. I remember one time when Jenson and Jonah joked about how their mom was a basket case while pregnant with Jade.
Not like she was crazy, but she would cry at the drop of a hat over every little thing.
I should go out there and let her know I’m okay, but I heard Kevlar say he was coming in here.
Maybe I should go out before he comes in.
I still don’t have my bearings yet, and it seems it’s like he’s my kryptonite, if that makes sense.
I don’t know why, it’s just the way he makes me feel.
He always has. It’s why what he did hurt.
The door opens, and in steps the man himself, wearing nothing more than a pair of sweatpants riding low on his hips.
“There more of that,” he grunts, eyes locked with mine, finger motioning to the mug in my hands.
I nod and take another sip.
Kevlar shakes his head, steps toward me, grips the seat of my stool, and turns me until I’m facing him. He moves even closer, hands cupping either side of my face. “You sleep okay?” he asks, watching me closely.
Again, I nod.
“Use words, Tigress,” he murmurs, his thumb brushing my bottom lip.
“Yes.” I breathe, clear my throat, and try to pull away, though he doesn’t allow me to do so.
Instead, he leans in and kisses my forehead. Only then does he step away and move over toward the coffee maker. “You definitely worried the hell out of Jade. We all figured you’d sleep more than just a couple hours.”
“I haven’t slept more than one to two hours, and that was always more like me closing my eyes and listening for anything that might be coming for me.” I shrug, not really wanting to talk about this or anything else.
Kevlar pauses briefly from pouring coffee into a mug. I drop my gaze, not wanting to see the heated look in his eyes. It makes me wish for things I have no business wanting.
“What do you want to do today?”
I’m surprised by Kevlar’s question and find myself jerking my gaze back to his and asking, “Why?”
“Figured we could do something together,” he mutters and moves back to me.
He figures we could do something together. Is he mad?
“What are you doing?” I ask, shaking my head. He’s confusing me.
“I’m up after managing an hour of sleep, and since I’m up, I’m spending time with you. Now, what do you want to do?” Planting a hip against the counter, legs crossed, he watches me intently.
And that pisses me off.
“I’m not doing anything with you,” I snap and put my mug down, no longer interested in drinking more of it.
Standing, I narrow my gaze on him. “You can go do whatever the hell you want, but leave me alone. You want to know what I’m going to do?
I’m getting away from you and anyone else who wants to know what I want to do. ”
“Calm down, baby, and tell me what’s going through that head of yours,” Kevlar says, straightening.
“No.” I can feel my anger growing. How dare he tell me to calm down or ask what’s in my head.
“I’m not talking to you about anything. It’s not your business what’s in my head, and for that matter, stop calling me names.
I’m not your anything, so just stop it.” I spin on my heel and stomp out of the kitchen before he can catch me.
But he does grab my hand halfway through the main room.
“What’s with the attitude this morning?” he asks, twirling me to face him, locking his arms around me.
“Let me go.” I shove against him, unable to break his hold.
“Not until you calm down.”
Something about the sternness in his voice causes something to snap inside me, and I scream, claw, and struggle in his arms. Still, the bastard doesn’t let go of me. He keeps me locked to him and holds on tight.
He wants me to calm down. To talk to him.
Tell him what’s in my head. How can I do that?
Why would he want to know? They didn’t care enough to find me for months.
Months! I endured so much, and he wants to know what I’m thinking?
I don’t even know. I only just found myself pulled out of the situation.
That freedom is far too easily gotten. I can’t help but wonder. To question if they were a part of it.
I’m not sure I should trust them, no matter the fact they’re family to me. Until I know for sure, I refuse to let anyone close to me, including this man. I should say, most especially Kevlar. I knew then, as I do now, he’s my undoing, and I can’t handle what he makes me feel.