Chapter 24
ROSEMARY
For three days, I’ve been able to avoid anyone and everyone. I needed to be alone. To come to terms with what’s happening right now and know that I’m the reason for Kevlar being held by Dominic at this moment.
Usually, I’d be in the gym sparring with someone to take out my frustration and guilt. I haven’t been able to do that. I hate the idea of going against someone. Possibly hurting them or, worse, killing them.
Last night, however, I did go into the gym after I knew everyone else had gone to bed for the night.
I sat there in the middle of the room staring at the ring, images of each of the fights I’ve had in the past months.
The pain had been nearly unbearable, but I refused to cry because if I did, I knew I would wake those closest to the gym.
I didn’t want to do that. They’d have come in and given me those looks of pity or, worse, the ones of anger.
I deserve their anger, really, I do, and because of this, I feel the shame of what I’m putting them all through.
Especially Zain. I’ve yet to meet him. I’m honestly terrified of meeting him when Kevlar isn’t here.
It’s why I’m hiding away in Kevlar’s room, refusing to come out.
I’d done as I’ve done since finding out Kevlar stayed behind.
I brought enough to drink in here from the kitchen.
If I want something to eat, I’ll get it when no one else is around.
By doing this and continuing to do so, I hopefully can manage to get through the next weeks.
Dread threatens to consume me with the very thought.
A heavy sigh passes my lips as I snuggle against Kevlar’s pillows and inhale the smell of him that still lingers there. I’m sure I look pathetic with the way I’m acting, but honestly, I don’t care.
I jump and flinch as the door is thrown open. My eyes widen as a man steps into the room, looking far too similar to Kevlar, but still you can tell the difference in looks. This must be Zain.
Where Kevlar’s eyes are a dark shade of blue, Zain’s are a lighter color.
Another difference is the tattoos and how they hold themselves.
Kevlar’s bulkier, his body chiseled, whereas Zain looks a bit leaner.
You can also see the difference in the way this man walks so confidently.
Not to say Kevlar doesn’t have confidence, but the way he moves is with more of a swagger, maybe a bit of prowling.
Okay a bit more than a prowl. He can be like a predator stalking his prey at times.
This man is though, you can clearly see his intent and determination all over his face.
“Time for hiding and wallowing is over,” Zain remarks harshly, stalking to the side of the bed.
He doesn’t give me a chance to speak. Instead, he grips my arm, bends at the waist, and jerks me up off the bed and over his shoulder.
“We’re going to get a few things straight, woman, and we’re doing that now. ”
What in the world is he talking about?
Zain carts me out of the room, and as soon as he turns toward the gym, I know where we’re heading, and it freaks me out.
“Put me down,” I demand, struggling against his hold on my legs. “Damnit, let me go.”
“Not a chance,” the guy snaps. He carts me through the doors and straight to where I know is the ring.
“Toss her through the ropes.”
I go still at the commanding tone I know belongs to Viper. What the hell is he doing?
“Gladly,” Zain growls and does just that, sending me rolling into the ring. I stop just inside it at Viper’s feet.
Staring up at him with wide eyes, I feel my throat tightening. “What are you doing, Viper?”
“Helping my brother by preparing you for fight night,” Viper answers and holds a hand out for me. “Get up. We’re sparring, Rosie. You and me.”
“But I don’t want to spar against you,” I whisper, unable to move.
“You’re not just sparring against me, Rosemary.” His eyes flash with pure irritation at me. “You’re going against all of us. Including Zain.”
“Why?” The question slips out as I manage to get to my feet.
“Because to help our brother, we’ve got to make sure you can handle what’s about to go down,” Aries speaks up from one corner of the ring. “We’re all fighting, risking our lives for you. As payment, you’re going to take us all on. Each day until the fight, you’re sparring with each of us.”
Oh my God.
“I can’t do this,” I utter, shaking my head.
“You can and you will,” Zain snaps, standing behind me at another ring post.
“You don’t know me. You don’t know what I can and cannot do,” I say, shaking my head and stepping back.
“I know my brother, though, and he wouldn’t be with a weak woman.
You want to make sure he survives the night of the fights?
Then you need to make sure your ass is in the right state of mind.
I’m a fuckin’ cop, and yet I’m helping these assholes train to go into death match fights, knowing what will happen.
I’m doing it for my brother. Because he needs me, just like he fuckin’ well needs his woman to be strong for him. ”
I stare at the man who looks so much like Kevlar, my chest aching, and my throat feels like it’s going to close up on me.
“Now, you’re gonna go up against Viper first, and don’t think I haven’t heard what type of fighter you are. I know what you’re capable,” Zain remarks.
“Let’s get started,” Viper commands, getting my attention.
Spinning around to face the other man, my body trembles, and I want to throw up. “Please don’t do this to me, Viper.”
“Rosie, if I didn’t see you as a little sister. Want nothing but the best for you, I wouldn’t be doing this in the first fuckin’ place. Now come on, we’re sparring,” he declares, acting like this is something we’ve done before, which we hadn’t.
The two of us circle each other, and he throws a punch that I block out of instinct. It’s all I can do not to pass out. He keeps throwing jabs, and I’m not ready for them. I don’t realize it until I fall back on my ass that tears are streaming down my face.
“Come on, Rosie, get your ass back up,” Viper commands, not even breaking a sweat.
“Prez, let me go up against her,” Aries says, climbing through the ropes.
Oh God, this isn’t good. Aries hates me, and I know it.
“Now Rosie, you can fight against me. Prove to me that you’re the woman my best friend deserves and not some bitch who uses tears to get her way.”
Aries’s statement causes me to flinch, and I can’t blame him.
Sucking in a breath, I start fighting him, sparring, my mind going to those women I killed.
My head aches with the images that overtake me.
Unable to focus or stay upright, I drop to my knees, my hands clutching at either side of my head, and I scream in agony at the haunting images of those innocent women.
It hurts to think of them. To know that I’m the reason behind their deaths. Their blood stains my hands.
Sobs rack my body as Aries grabs both my wrists and pulls my hands away from my head.
“Look at me, Rosie,” he commands. I do as he says, but it’s hard to face him.
“You’ve got to come to terms with what happened to you.
What you had to do wasn’t on you. The blame lies at Dominic’s feet.
You fought, babe. You did it to survive.
Those women would have done the same and they might not have felt the guilt you do.
You gotta let it go. If you don’t, it’ll end up consuming you. ”
“But it could be you guys next, and that will be on me.”
“Rosie, it ain’t gonna happen. We’ll win our matches, and guess what?” He smirks.
“What?” I whisper, my breath hitching.
“None of us will flinch at knowing we’ll be killing in those matches. We know what we’re up against. Same with Kevlar. He won’t give two shits about killing a man long as it means he’s coming home to you after.”
Aries’s words sink in, and I nod, unable to speak through the tears still clogging my throat.
“Now, you gonna get that sweet ass up and fight or run with your tail tucked between your legs?” he asks, straightening and holding a hand for me to take.
“Fight,” I manage to croak.
“Good girl, now prove to us that you’ll be able to handle what’s gonna go down.”
I nod and let out a breath as I scamper to my feet without his help. If I’m going to prove to them and myself, I’ve got to let it go, as he said. I need to do this. Prepare myself for what I’ll have to witness because I know it’s not going to be easy to handle.
But as long as Kevlar comes out breathing, I know everything will be okay.