Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
CJ
I can’t believe what I’d heard. I’ve been sleeping in the man’s bed for the past month with his arms holding me to him as I slept.
How many times has he gone to the clubhouse and gotten his rocks off with one of the women they keep around for convenience?
All the while, I’m dying to have him touch me. It’s driving me insane, wanting him to touch me, to do anything.
Damnit.
And damn him.
Since waking up in the hospital the second time and finding myself in his arms, I decided to let him do as he asks. I decided to let him help.
I’m freaked by the whole thing of me telling anyone. By telling them, I’m trusting they don’t treat me any differently when they hear it.
To have heard the sounds of those women calling Axe’s name through the line was a low blow to my ego.
Okay, not that I really have an ego. I have no experience with men besides what was done in my aunt and uncle’s basement, and I don’t even classify that as anything other than them abusing me in any way possible.
They’d wanted to abuse me. Train me to be used for nothing but sex.
To breed the next generation of men for their Dark Lord.
I mean, who the hell did they think they were.
The last time I’d been taken down there, my uncle brought his brother down there who claimed I was to be a Chosen. Whatever that means.
Shaking my head, I swipe angrily at the tears spilling down my cheeks. How could he? I wanted to trust him and now, I don’t know if I can.
Am I that hideous that he can’t stand to do something with me, let alone kiss me for god’s sake?
I rush to pack my bag, not wanting to risk being here when Axe gets home.
He hung up on me, and I’m sure he’s on the way here with some bullshit excuse of only what I can imagine.
It’s not you, it’s me? Or maybe it’ll be something about they’re tempting, and I can’t hold back from the beauty or the easy access. I can’t blame him there either.
I mean, I’m not one to open my legs and give it up to anyone. Which I would love nothing more than to do with Axe.
Throwing the rest of my things into my bag, I touch my stomach, which is nearly healed.
The doctors still want me to take it easy, but they said I could do some things besides lying around in bed all day.
Not that I didn’t enjoy the days Axe stayed lying there with me.
I would bite the inside of my lip to keep from begging him to kiss me.
To touch me, take me, and make me feel like a woman.
Sighing, I shake my head in denial.
No, there’s no way he could do something as simple as want to be with someone like me. I’m a disappointment, wanted only by those who would actually do me more harm than anything.
Swiping angrily at the tears spilling down my cheeks, I stomp to Axe’s bathroom and grab the last of my things.
I barely get through shoving the rest of my shit into the large duffle bag that doesn’t even belong to me when I find myself yanked away from the damn thing.
The hands that yanked me spin me around to face a pissed-off Axe.
Great, what the hell did I do?
He has no right to be pissed.
Then again, I really don’t have the right to throw his spare time activities with whores in his face.
I’m simply jealous of this and want it to be me. I want it so much, but still, it's completely out of my reach because I have to stay one step ahead and not let them decide to take Apricot instead of me. She’s pure beauty now that she’s grown up where I’m hideous.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Axe snarls, getting in my face.
“I’m leaving. It’s obvious I’m cramping your style,” I state sarcastically.
“You’re not going anywhere, CJ,” he sneers, pulling me even tighter to him, wrapping his arms fully around me.
“Yeah, I am, Axe,” I snap.
“Andrew.”
“Come again?” I blink at the sudden name.
“When we’re fuckin’ alone, you don’t call me by my road name. In fact, I don’t want to hear you callin’ me Axe, period. The only name that should come from your lips, Citrus, is Andrew, my name,” he says gruffly.
Oh.
Um.
Wow.
I didn’t see that coming.
“I don’t think so,” I mutter, standing my ground. I can’t give him anything. I can’t be anything for him.
Don’t think about him having called you Citrus. Or the sound of your name on his lips rather than your initials.
Besides, he’s just been with two whores.
“Oh, I know so, baby. I know you’ll be screaming my name here soon,” he growls, guiding me backward toward the bed. With one hand, he reaches past me to swipe the duffle bag onto the floor.
I then find myself being carefully laid on the bed.
“Now tell me what the fuck those bitches had you hear,” he says, a look of menace on his face as he curls his lip in disgust, mentioning those whores.
I close my eyes and shake my head to block out those women’s moans of pleasure. I heard them panting Axe’s name and hung up before I could hear anymore. For some reason, I called his number a few minutes later. He answered, sounding his normal self, not breathless or groaning with pleasure.
“Tell me, Citrus,” he mutters. His crotch sits right against the apex between my legs and the feel of his hardness is a surprise to me.
“I don’t want to,” I murmur, opening my eyes to meet his.
“You think this is for them?” he demands, grinding himself into me.
My body reacts unintentionally. I have to swallow down the moan that wants to part my lips.
“I didn’t do a damn thing with those two slobber-crawlers.
I was too busy in the shower rubbin’ one out to images of you suckin’ my cock.
” I gasp at his words and the way he says them.
They’re sincere and I know he’s not lying.
He couldn’t be. Not with saying something like that.
“Yeah, Sunbeam, I was imagining your mouth around me suckin’ me deep into that sweet little mouth of yours while I pretended my hand was yours.
I spilled my cum down the drain to that image and every time, the last month has been the same way, just different ways.
Some of them were of taking you from behind, others against the wall, and even ones of pounding into you while your eyes were locked with mine. ”
By the time he finishes speaking, my breathing is labored and I want that.
I want all of what he just stated and more.
I want his mouth, his hands, his cock.
Damnit.
What is this man doing to me?
Suddenly, I find his mouth on mine and I’m alive with the heat of his body. The way he takes control, showing me what he wants with the demanding of his tongue spearing into my mouth claiming mine.
Everything seems to move with such intensity. I find myself naked within seconds under his hands. His mouth only coming from mine when the shirt is flying over my head.
Axe peppers kisses along my skin, sending chills of pleasure across my skin.
“Axe,” I pant, wanting so much more and yet not knowing how to ask for it. I also don’t want him to stop. I’m afraid if he stops. . . if I tell him. . . he’ll reject me.
Please, just this one time, let me not be a mockery and be what he needs. He might say I am, but I honestly need him to show me not to use meaningless words.
Taking his time, Axe moves with such ease, giving each of my breasts attention, and moves further down, putting my legs over his shoulders.
Axe’s eyes lift to meet mine, and I gasp at the intensity of his gaze.
“You’re mine, Citrus. I made that decision the night I first met you.
Since then, I haven’t fucked or touched another woman, let alone two.
I only want to take you to my bed. No other has been in this bed, let alone this house but you.
Do you know what that means?” he growls, his lips so close to my lower lips that I can feel them with each word, and it drives me insane.
My breath catches and my eyes widen.
I’m his?
He wants me?
This is what he’s saying. I’m his, that means he wants me. Butterflies have me nervous and I’m dying for him to do more.
The swipe of his tongue against my slit is intoxicating and I want more.
Moaning, I lift myself needing him to do that again.
He doesn’t leave me wanting for long. No, instead, he takes it upon himself to devour me as if I’m the last meal he’ll ever have.
Something inside me switches and I feel as if I’m about to burst through my skin when it happens.
Axe draws an orgasm from my body, making me scream aloud with the intensity of it.
During the orgasm, he pulls himself over me and opens his pants, lines himself up, and before I can say a word, Axe sinks in, breaking the barrier all in one swift thrust.
“Oh fuck, Citrus. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Why didn’t you tell me, baby? Shit, you should have stopped me,” Axe says, sounding pained by him hurting me.
“It’s okay,” I pant, barely feeling the pain of him taking my virginity. Instead, I feel him, the pleasure he’s giving me. “Don’t stop.”
“You sure, baby? I don’t want to hurt you,” he murmurs.
“Yes, I’m sure. Please make me feel beautiful for once.”
“Sunbeam, you are the most beautiful woman in the world to me,” Axe declares and slowly starts moving again. Keeping a steady rhythm with his thrusts while he lowers himself down to capture my mouth in a kiss. He braces himself enough not to put pressure on my stomach.
Everything seems to disappear around the two of us and it only becomes him and me. My body becomes all too aware of Axe and wants more of him.
He brings me over the edge sending me into an orgasm far more intense than the first, and I dig my fingers into his shoulder blades.
“Andrew,” I whimper when he picks up speed.
“Give me one more,” he commands through gritted teeth, sweat beads on his forehead dripping down.
“I can’t,” I moan, arching into him.
“You can and will,” he declares and reaches between us. Circling my clit he sends me off, shooting like a rocket. “Fuck yeah,” he growls, and I feel him coming even as he thrust deep inside me.
Only when he slows his movements do I begin to come down from the sensation he filled me with and fear starts to try and seep in.
What have we just done?