Chapter 19 Fort King Kwon
Fort King Kwon
YESOH'S POV
Present day
I paced back and forth in my dorm room, Sydney and Remi seated in front of me on my bed, watching me spiral over a single text message.
"Soh, if you go on like this, you're going to burst a blood vessel," Remi warned, tossing me the teddy bear on my bed, which I caught and squeezed for dear life.
"He's been weird since that day at the park when he saw the poster, which obviously I don't fault him for having that reaction—anyone would. But what I do fault him for is being a coward afterwards and ignoring me!" I complained.
"I keep telling you, men will waste your precious time. Just stay away from them," Sydney sighed, taking out a light pink shade of nail polish from my dresser and starting to color her toes.
"Last I checked, you and Jax have been married since you were fifteen?" Remi reminded her. "So you have no room to hate on a girl for trying."
"Well, fair enough, but I just hate to see you get hurt again, Yesoh. Let's not forget that the history book on the shelf tends to—"
"Repeat itself. I know. I listen to ABBA and I've watched Mamma Mia twelve times!" I exasperated. "But I've been trying to tell you guys that this isn't the same as when we were kids."
"How, Yesoh?" Remi sighed. "Because from what you've described, it doesn't seem all that different from when you were fifteen."
"You don't have to believe me," I choked, shaking my head and glancing out the window. "You can even call me crazy."
"Cahya did say you get a bit…crazy about him," Sydney recalled with a cheeky smile.
"He used to look past me," I explained, looking back at them, "but now he sees right through me."
"Do we ever get to know what's in that diary?" Remi questioned. "Not that I'm nosy or anything!"
"It's betrayal enough for me to read it, but to show others, I— he'd never forgive me," I told them. "You'll just have to take my word for it."
"You're my best friend, Soh. I'll always take your word as gospel, but I need you to be sure about it this time. Because the risk you're taking, there's no going back. It's all in, with everything you've got, to get through to him, or nothing at all," Sydney warned me, her face turning stern.
"You also need to be prepared to face the potential backlash if he finds out. When you fall and lose balance in ballet, what do you do? Do you deny it? Do you throw a fit?" Remi foretold. "No, you take your stumble in stride. You get back up."
"I understand," I assured them. "I just don't understand why he's pulling away from me."
"What happens when water meets a live wire?" Remi asked me.
"What?" I muttered in confusion. "Since when are we women in STEM?"
"It causes an electric shock because of the sparks," Sydney answered. "Oh!"
"Exactly. So if you're right, and as you say, things have changed between you two, maybe those sparks caused a shock too, one that he didn't see coming," Remi anticipated.
"Yeah, that, or he thinks you're super annoying and despises your existence!" Sydney calculated, and then the room fell silent. "Oh, come on, what did I do? I thought we were being science girlies and exploring all possibilities?"
"Whatever. Not to mention that cryptic text he sent about us all meeting at his apartment," I pondered. "He's being weird."
"Or maybe he just wants to see his friends again," Remi suggested. "Did you guys even consider that, or jumped straight into 'he's a freak' territory?"
"You're right, Remi. I mean, we've barely seen each other since he came back. Maybe he just wants to see us all together again," Sydney thought. "Soh, do you want to go with Jax and I? He's picking me up tomorrow evening."
"Yeah, sure," I agreed. "Anyways, I have to go practice. Auditions are in a week. I can't waste any time."
"I hope those jerks aren't still giving you a hard time about wanting to be lead as a woman of color?" Remi seethed. "They're such privileged, ostentatious losers."
"Ditto. They have this singular image of what the poster Juilliard prima should look like, and they don't even realize it's deeply rooted in racism," Sydney huffed. "I saw this down south too when I was growing up."
"And what's worse is that the worst thing I could possibly do is let them see that it gets to me—no, I'll never allow that," I asserted, grabbing my bag. "Thanks for listening, guys."
"I love you, Soh. I'll even visit you after he files a restraining order on you and you end up in the local psych ward," Sydney smiled, blowing a kiss at me.
"I'll decorate your straightjacket," Remi offered, and I rolled my eyes playfully.
A good friend is worth, well, everything.
The next day
I stood outside Wynter's apartment, my fingers gripping the strap of my bag, trying to steady my nerves. I couldn't believe I had shown up there. I was supposed to have caught a ride with Sydney and Jax, but I got carried away with practice.
And so here I was, trying to convince myself that this was just another hangout.
But the idea that Wynter had invited us all over kept making my heart race.
He'd told me that day in the park that he missed it—he missed those summers when we all got together and could just be, before the pressures of the world had dawned on us.
Maybe this was him finally acting on that longing.
Maybe it had nothing to do with me in particular.
Did he really want me there, or just his friends as a whole?
Regardless of what it was, I was there, and I was wearing my heart on my sleeve, knowing I was showing him right where to aim and make it hurt.
After a moment's hesitation, I knocked. The door opened, and there he was—Wynter, standing in a loose sweater, looking every bit as relaxed and at home as I'd imagined he would. His expression softened when he saw me, but there was a flicker of surprise in his eyes.
"Yesoh?" he said, like he hadn't expected me to be the one on his doorstep. But then he gave me a small, almost shy smile. "Hello. You're… here."
I shifted awkwardly, not wanting to sound too eager. "Yeah, um… you said you were having everyone over, so I thought…"
"Oh," he replied, and I noticed his eyes dart to the side for a second before returning to mine. "Yeah, no, everyone already showed up anyway, so come in. It's nice to see you."
"Is it? You don't seem so sure," I chuckled.
"No, no. This time I'm quite certain," he nodded, ushering me inside.
I stepped in, taking in the warm, slightly chaotic scene.
Bae was sprawled on the couch, laughing with Sydney and Jax, who were huddled together, swapping jokes and snacks.
Cahya was sitting cross-legged on the floor, sorting through a stack of movies with an intensity that made me wonder if he was secretly judging each one.
As I stood there, a bit uncertain, Bae turned around, grinning when she saw me. "Yesoh!" she called, waving me over. "We were wondering if you'd actually come."
I gave her a half-smile, feeling a bit more at ease. "Wouldn't miss it," I said, though my eyes drifted back to Wynter, who was watching me with an unreadable expression.
"You're so grown up now!" I marveled at the seventeen-year-old version of her that I was unfamiliar with, but her bubbly persona remained constant.
"Hell yeah, I even have boobs and a learner's permit!" she responded, and I laughed.
"Such a win, Bae," I affirmed, and then she reached forward and hugged me, warmth radiating through me. "How's Nottingham?"
"Cold. Wet. English," she explained, not seeming quite fond. "I much prefer it here…"
"In the U.S.?" I wondered, but she shook her head silently, glancing towards her brother.
"Where my home is," she sighed, then smiled as if to say, forget it. "I'm happy you're still you, Yesoh. I was worried that when everything changed—so did you."
"Took you long enough, Yesoh. What film do you wanna watch tonight?" Sydney asked me. "Cahya wants to watch IT, Jax and I wanna watch Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, but Bae and Wynter wanna see Barbie: A Fairy Secret."
I glanced over at Wynter and lifted a condescending eyebrow. "Barbie?"
"I was held at gunpoint against my will," he assured me. "I wanted to see Cars—"
"Yeah, right. Last night we watched Mermaid Tale. You're a liar!" Bae accused. "We as a unit prefer Barbie."
"Damn, got it. I won't question your expertise again," I lifted my hands in surrender.
At that, Wynter cleared his throat. "Do you want something to drink?" he offered, his voice softer now.
"Sure, water would be great," I replied, a little too quickly.
He disappeared into the kitchen, and I settled onto the couch next to Bae, who immediately leaned over, her voice low. "You know he was excited you'd be here, right?"
My heart skipped. "Did he… say that?"
She shrugged, giving me a knowing smile. "He didn't have to."
Before I could ask what she meant, Wynter returned, handing me a glass of lemonade.
His fingers brushed mine, just barely, but I felt warmth spread through me.
"Thanks," I whispered, looking up to find him watching me.
There was something intense in his gaze, something that made me feel seen in a way I couldn't quite explain. "Two cubes of ice?"
He nodded, not breaking eye contact. "And pulp, just how you like it. Anytime."
The others were chatting, their laughter filling the room as they bickered over which movie to start with. Finally, Cahya picked the Stephen King horror movie, grinning mischievously as he loaded it into the player.
"Don't blame me if you can't sleep tonight," he said, smirking as he settled onto the floor with a pile of blankets. Sydney groaned, scooting closer to Jax, who put a casual arm around her as they snuggled into the couch.