Chapter 25 The War by. SYML
Jackie
We had gotten to Eugene a short time ago and agreed that Theo and Violet would stay at my apartment with Jedi for the night and I would sleep at Will’s.
Theo was planning on flying home first thing in the morning so we said our goodbye’s tonight.
I was hoping I could get her to move here sooner than later.
I knew a lot more planning had to go into her moving than when I did because of Violet, but I would do everything I could do to help.
“I’m going to sleep for like twelve hours straight. I'm so tired,” I stated as Will parked the car in his driveway.
“Maybe hold off on that,” Will gestured to his front porch. “We have visitors.”
I looked to where he gestured to see Fai and Sarah standing by his front porch.
I groaned.
I loved my friends and did need to talk to Fai but I was hoping to do so after a good rest and a big meal. Talking things out when tired and hungry was never a good idea. But it looked like I had no other choice.
Will got out of the car, waved to our friends and rounded the hood to open my door. He grabbed my hand and didn’t let go. We were showing a united front to them, showing Fai I was serious about my choice. That we were serious about each other.
I squeezed his hand three times out of habit to tell him I loved him and he responded the same. I knew I could handle whatever Fai threw at me today with Will by my side.
We approached the two on the front porch. Fai seemed angry, maybe even more angry than before. Sarah looked concerned and even a bit scared.
“What’s going on?” Will asked cautiously as we approached them, obviously feeling the same vibe that I did.
Fai looked straight at me as he answered, “I got a couple of calls for you this morning. One was from a woman. Her name was Janice. Super nice. She wanted to follow up about the article that you are writing. You know the one I am talking about? The one you scrapped a month ago?”
Crap, he was past mad.
Not only was I dating Will but I was investigating a case he told me to drop. A case I told him I did drop. It looks like all my lies had finally caught up with me. I guess it was time to come clean.
“Let’s go inside,” I stated and walked towards the door past Fai and Sarah. Will let us in and we made our way to the living room.
I collapsed on the couch, the fatigue from not sleeping well for weeks slipping in. I looked up towards the ceiling as I heard everyone sit down. I was too tired for this.
“Jackie, explain,” Fai urged. I slowly looked down and met his eyes. He looked so disappointed in me. I knew he was. I did everything he told me not to and lied to him about it. He must have seen something in me, because he seemed to soften after a moment. “Please.”
I sighed.
It was now or never.
“I never dropped the case. I knew there was more and you didn’t believe me. I-I just wanted to show you there was more. Goldie and Oliver helped make sure I stayed off your radar at work. They believed me. I have been following leads since.”
Fai stared at me for a moment. He sighed heavily before speaking.
“First, I need to apologize for how I reacted to your news about you and Will. That was uncalled for.” He turned to Will before continuing.
“I apologize to you as well. I have things I need to work through and I treated you in ways you didn’t deserve. ”
Will scoffed in response and I shot him a glare. Will did have a right to be upset. He had been on Fai’s shitlist for years, but now wasn’t the time.
“Thank you, Fai,” I said.
He nodded in acknowledgement. “Jackie, I love you. Fuck, I love you so much. But I’m your boss and you spent weeks using work time to work on this case which I told you to drop. I-I’m sorry, but I have to let you go from Fibonacci Files.”
I stared at him in shock. He looked so disappointed in me. I had never seen him this upset before. It was as if feeling this way about me was hurting him. I had never meant to hurt him.
“Faizal! You can’t fire her,” Sarah proclaimed as she rose to her feet.
“What the fuck, Fai?” Will yelled at Fai.
I said nothing, but just stared at the man I thought was my greatest supporter.
I knew I could never earn my parents' love, but I thought I would always have Fai’s.
I guess I was wrong. I felt the tears before I registered they were coming from me.
He just stared back, ignoring the other two in the room as well.
I would always remember the look he gave me when he found me on the bench after I ditched out on the AA meeting. It wasn’t pity I saw but understanding. He knew exactly what I felt. He just wanted to help.
Yes, it was me that put in the work to be sober, but it was him who held back my hair as I puked from withdrawals. He was there when I got each of my chips. He was there when I published my first article. Fai was my brother, my protector, my friend.
Now, he was breaking my heart.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I just wanted to make you proud. Show you I was worth it.”
“Jackie,” Fai sighed. “You were always worth it.”
“Then why?” I asked. “Why fire me?
“The second call I received,” he explained. “I would have been okay if you followed the case. I trusted your judgment to chase the cases and the stories that needed the truth told.”
Trusted?
Did he no longer trust me?
“Who was the second call?” I asked.
“Griffin Whitley.”
Fuck.
“Why did he call?” Will asked confused.
I should have told him about the first call. And the second I received the next morning.
Fai ignored Will and continued to speak to me. “He couldn’t get a hold of you at home, so he decided to try your work number. He was curious why you stopped answering. He was curious if it had started. Didn’t explain what that meant.”
“Fai, I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to escalate this far,” I whispered through my tears.
“What the hell is he talking about, Jackie?” Will asked.
“Griffin called me after we got back from New York. Wanted to know if I liked the drawings,” I explained.
“What drawings?” Fai asked. He turned to Sarah. “Do you know what drawings?”
She nodded her head yes. Fai only sighed in response. I couldn’t imagine how hurt he must have felt. Everyone was lying to him and we had been for a while now.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Will asked me.
“There was already so much going on, and the nightmares were just getting worse and I was so tired. Fai was so mad at me. Then Kai got hurt and my parents were horrible.” I could feel myself starting to hyperventilate. “It’s all just too much and I am so sorry and so tired.”
I was panicking.
It was all too much. I felt like my world was crumbling. My parents hated me, Fai fired me. I no longer had my work or my greatest supporter. I felt Will wrap his arms around me and try to soothe me. At least I had Will. Maybe he was mad I didn’t tell him, but he was here.
“Why fire her over the call, Faizal?” Sarah asked.
“Because I can't trust her judgment anymore. She believes stories that aren’t real,” he explained. “My journal focuses on the truth, not in this conspiracy shit you are all believing in now.”
“He threatened her, Fai,” Will stated. “He says that she will go missing next. I don’t want to believe him, Fai, and you don’t have to. But keep an open mind. She may be at risk.”
Fai paused for a moment, contemplating what Will said. “She isn’t going to up and disappear. This case you're all investigating, it’s just stories.”
“The nightmares? You’re still having them?” Sarah asked me, concern filling her gaze.
I nodded. “Every night.”
She walked over to the other side of me and hugged me as well. I was surrounded by two of the kindest, most incredible people I knew. Yet I felt so alone staring at Fai.
He looked so betrayed, so hurt.
“Who’s Kai?” he asked.
“My brother.”
His eyes grew wide in shock. “You have a brother?”
I nodded in response. “Two. Kai and Nate.”
“You have two brothers you never told me about? I thought you trusted me?” God, he sounded so hurt. I deserved his anger, his hurt.
“Nate,” I hiccuped from my sobs while trying to explain. “Nate died and it was just too hard to talk about.”
Fai rubbed his face with his hands, trying to make sense of everything. He looked at me with tears in his eyes. “I don’t even know you.”
“You do! I promise you do!” I sobbed as Will continued to hold my shaking body.
Fai shook his head as he stood. “I don’t. You lied to me, Jackie. For years, you lied. And now, it’s just one lie after another. I…I thought you trusted me.”
With that, I watched as he turned and walked out. I broke down on the couch, not understanding how I got here. He was right, I did lie to him. I lied to him over and over and over again.
God, I was so awful.
Sarah stood to talk with Will. “I’ll talk to him. He’s hurt now, but he just needs to process. It’s a lot.” She crouched in front of me so we were eye to eye. “He loves you, Ophelia. I promise, he just needs time.” She kissed my cheek and followed her husband out.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the calls,” I whispered to Will. I couldn’t lose him too.
“Shhh. It’s okay. I’m not mad,” he whispered back.
We sat there for a moment on the couch. I needed to fix this, but I wasn’t sure how.
How do you fix something you broke?
Will stood with me in his arms and walked us to his room. He laid me gently on the bed as I continued to cry. It was all just too much. He slowly stripped the clothes off my body and pulled one of his shirts over my head. I laid there as he crawled into bed and pulled me into his body.
“Go to sleep, Jackie. You need it,” he whispered in my ear as I drifted off from pure exhaustion. “I love you.”
It was in his arms that I got the greatest, most restful sleep. While I still had the nightmares, they didn’t seem nearly as bad when he was close.