Chapter Seventeen
I was tiptoeing out of Ryan’s room after pawing through his drawers for a T-shirt and a pair of his boxers.
I needed coffee. I also needed to figure out how embarrassed I needed to be I’d woken him up in the middle of the night and instigated sex.
Well, I hadn’t meant to instigate sex. I’d intended to give him a blow job, but then all his sexy talk along with the taste of him and the way I very clearly had command of his body got me all hot and bothered, and I couldn’t not have sex with him.
Though, truth be told, he had sex with me, and that was not a complaint.
I wasn’t a floozy, nor was I a prude. I enjoyed sex, but I didn’t troll bars with the explicit intent to find a man to take home.
Though I’d had a few one-night stands. Neither was I a woman who had a rule about a certain number of dates before I allowed intimacy.
I was more of an if the time is right, it’s right kind of girl.
I was somewhere in the middle, and as such I’d had more than a handful of lovers, but that count barely hit double digits, and none of the men I’d been with could compare to Ryan.
It was like the men who’d come before weren’t even playing the same game.
They were playing flag football and Ryan was playing rugby.
Full-body engagement, intense, sometimes brutal in all the best ways—explosive power, brilliant endurance, and out-of-the-world five-point try with a conversation kick thrown in for good measure.
In other words, I’d never had better sex then the two times I’d had it with Ryan. Which also meant I was sore in all the right places. Further, I wasn’t sure if my embarrassment would stop me from asking him for round three before he drove me home today.
I was leaning toward throwing whatever dignity I had left out the window in favor of a few more mind-bending orgasms—because Ryan, I’d learned, was a multiple-orgasm master—when I entered the kitchen, stopped dead, and barely suppressed the scream that had bubbled up.
“Mornin’ Chloe,” Gavin rumbled from the island.
“Um,” I mumbled.
“Made coffee,” he continued like there was nothing wrong with this situation. “Help yourself.”
“Um . . . I didn’t know . . .” Shit. What didn’t I know? That he was here? That he’d catch me coming out of Ryan’s room again? That I was indeed a floozy who was screwing her boss, and now her other boss knew?
“I take it you didn’t know I live here.”
He lived here.
Ho-lee shit.
My mind did a fast rewind of last night, praying to all things holy I hadn’t screamed Ryan’s name like he’d told me I was going to do.
When I got to the part where my second orgasm tore through me while Ryan was behind me, one hand in my hair giving it a delicious pull while his other arm was wrapped around my hips, his hand between my legs, his relentless fingers at my clit, relentlessly toying, and I was panting—and yes, screaming his name—I changed my prayer to pleading for the walls to be soundproofed.
“Um. No.”
His lips twitched. “Right.”
I felt a hand on my lower back, jumped, and that startled scream I’d been able to tamp down came out as a squeak.
Ryan’s mouth went to my ear. “Kiss me before you roll out of bed.”
“Huh?”
“Before you get out of bed, kiss me.”
It was safe to say waking up next to Ryan had been a dream come true.
However, the weirdness of yesterday and the middle-of-the-night romp that I still didn’t know which way I was leaning toward—best decision of my life, or most humiliating—made me not want to be in that bed when Ryan woke up.
Which led me in search of coffee and head unscrambling. Which was thwarted by Gavin being here.
Yet with all of that, Ryan asking—no, demanding—me to kiss him before I got out of bed was oddly beautiful and just plain odd.
“Why?”
“Fell asleep last night with you in my arms. I didn’t like waking up and you not being there. If you get up before I do, kiss me before you roll out so I won’t wake up expecting you to be there and finding the bed empty.”
There was nothing odd about that explanation. It was straight-up beautiful. It was also the scariest thing I’d ever heard. In another life I would’ve vowed to wake him up with a kiss every morning and, to ensure that happened, I’d set five alarms to make sure I always woke up before him.
But I wasn’t living another life. I was living mine. And it was time for me to snap out of fantasyland and get back to reality.
“Since that won’t ever happen again, there’s no need for me—”
“That won’t happen again.”
“Nope.”
Ryan’s eyes roamed my face for a moment, then, like we didn’t have company and he hadn’t just dangled my wildest dream in front of my face when I couldn’t reach out and grab it, he made it worse.
“Damn, you’re gorgeous in the morning.”
I hadn’t looked in the mirror before I left Ryan’s room, but I felt like a mangy cat who’d been out in the rain all night and was in desperate need of a bath, and I was pretty sure that was what I looked like.
“Listen—”
“Get some coffee,” Ryan interrupted. “Then we’ll shower and head to your house so you can change your clothes. We’re meeting Poppy at Pete’s place in a few hours.”
Poppy at Pete’s place.
That was a mouthful of Ps in one sentence. It was also confusing, and not because of the Ps.
“Why is Poppy at place Pete’s?” I shook my head and started again. “Pete’s place.”
I heard Gavin chuckle.
Damn. I totally forgot he was in the room.
“Next up we’ll be eating a peck of pickled peppers with Pete and Poppy at Pete’s place.” Gavin snickered.
Ryan rolled his eyes, ignored his friend, and answered me. “She’s not there. Jack and Cat are going to pick her up there for the meeting.”
“Meeting?”
I was never fond of anyone speaking to me like I was a child, but I found when Ryan did it, I became incensed. “Did you forget yesterday?”
“No, Ryan, I didn’t forget yesterday. But yesterday was yesterday and it doesn’t explain why there’s a meeting at Pete’s and why Poppy, not to mention me, will be attending this meeting.”
“Poppy’s friend is missing,” he unnecessarily reminded me.
“We’re looking into that. The we in that is me and the guys.
To do that, we need information from Poppy.
You’re going to be there because your friend was freaking out yesterday and, today, she’ll be no less freaked.
We also might need you to fill in some blanks about the Vault.
Then when we’re done with that, we’ll talk about when Poppy’s giving notice and you quitting and how that’s going to work. ”
Dread hit my stomach like a boulder.
“I’m not—”
“I swear to Christ, if you tell me you’re not quitting, I’m gonna cuff you to my goddamn bed until this is over.”
I jerked back in surprise. Not at what Ryan said but at the sincerity I saw blazing through his anger.
“You’d cuff me to your bed.”
“Yes.”
“Are you insane?”
“No, baby. You’re the one who’s fucking insane if you think there’s anything in this world worth continuing to work at a place where women have gone missing from.
Women who, honest to God, I pray are dead, because if they’re not, they’re living in a nightmare and I don’t wish that shit on anyone except the monsters who force them to live that shit.
And since I wouldn’t wish that life on my worst enemy, I sure as shit will do whatever I have to do to keep you from going back and putting yourself in danger. ”
He was right, but he was also wrong. There was something worth risking my life for.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Seriously. Did you not pay attention to any-fucking-thing from yesterday?”
“Oh, I paid attention. But you sure as shit didn’t.”
Gavin cut into our argument. “I’m gonna go get dressed.”
“I am too,” I announced. “I work at noon. Would you mind dropping me by my place so I can get ready?”
“Chloe, sweetheart,” Gavin started. “I’ve covered your shift for this afternoon.”
Covered my shift?
“I’m fine to go in. I need to go in. I can’t miss work. Call whoever is covering and tell them they don’t need to cover.”
At most Ryan lived five miles from me. If I left now, I could walk home and still get to work on time.
“Chloe—”
“I missed working yesterday. I need the money, Gavin.”
“Ryan put you on the manager’s payroll. You’ll be paid for yesterday and today.”
My eyes swung back to Ryan. His expression was blank, but his eyes were working overtime scanning my face.
Yesterday that concentration had felt good. It felt like concern. It felt safe. Now it felt intrusive and ugly.
“How dare you—”
Ryan’s hand wrapped around mine, and before I could finish what I was saying, he was dragging me down the hall.
Which was fine by me. I needed to change my clothes and get home, but to do that, I’d have to visit Ryan’s delicious den of debauchery one more time.
And it was good I was so pissed, because if I wasn’t, I’d likely be stupid and take my time to memorize the look and feel of his bedroom.
I’d be sad I’d never sleep in his bed again or feel him curled around me or how for the first time in my life I didn’t feel so damn alone.
Ryan slammed the door and let go of my hand. Before I could go on a quest to find my clothes, his question stopped me in my tracks.
“Why’d you stop depositing money into your savings account?”
“What?”
“Ten months ago, you stopped depositing money. Eight months ago, you started making withdrawals. Now you’ve got seventeen dollars in the account. Why?”
“How do you know that?” I asked, with my heart thudding in my chest.
“Answer me, baby.”
“Don’t baby me, asshole. How do you know that?”
“I asked Fallon to look into why you were working so many jobs. I know you don’t do drugs or drink, never heard of you gambling.
No deadbeat boyfriends. Something happened ten months ago that led you to stop saving money, start spending it, and work yourself until you’re dog-ass tired. I’m asking you what that is.”
He had Fallon look into me.
My bosses looked into my finances.
What the hell?
“No, Ryan, you’re not asking me. You asked Fallon. And you don’t get to know.”
I turned to leave, but before I could, Ryan grabbed my hand.
“Let me go.”
“No, Chloe, I’m not letting you go.”
“Oh, I forgot if I don’t do what you say, you’ll cuff me to your bed. Fine. I quit.”
That wasn’t a lie. It was one of those fibs that lacked context, so it wasn’t an outright lie. I was quitting a job, just not the one he’d demanded me to.
“Chloe, we need to—”
“No, Ryan, we don’t need to do anything.”
“You’re not quitting the Plank.”
I blinked at him.
“Damn, I forgot again, Mr. Boss of Everything gets to tell me where I’m going to work and where I’m not going to work.”
“Jesus fuck, woman,” he exploded. “I get you’re pissed at me, and I get why.
If someone helped themselves to my bank accounts, I’d be pissed as fuck.
But I also hope I’d be smart enough to listen to the people around me who care about me.
Not to mention give them the benefit of the doubt that they weren’t being nosy fucks and had my best interest and safety at heart. ”
I knew Ryan didn’t look into my accounts because he was simply nosy. I knew he thought he had my best interests at heart. Still, it didn’t change a thing.
“You broke my trust.”
“I didn’t break your trust, Chloe. I looked into why you were working yourself to death while at the same time draining your accounts, and the only reason I did that was so I understood why you were working at the Vault and how best to get you out of a very bad situation, and I only did that after you mentioned walking fucking dogs and fell asleep mid-conversation. ”
Shit. I was going to have to go back to walking dogs, cleaning office buildings, and finding a part-time job bartending somewhere. My car was fucked. I needed to get that fixed, then sell it, and it was time to talk to my mom about moving in with her to save money.
“You have no idea,” I whispered. “No fucking clue how hard I’ve worked.
How hard I’m still working. How fucking tired I am.
Exhausted all the time. I don’t even have time to do laundry, forget putting it away.
I can’t remember the last time I went to the grocery store or cooked in my apartment.
I was finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Finally. In a few months, I’d be able to start replacing the money I had to take out.
I might actually be able to curl up on my couch, watch some TV.
Cook a meal. Veg out and do nothing for a few hours.
I was almost there, and I was getting close because of the money I made at the Vault.
“But you’re right. If working there is going to put me in danger, I can’t keep working there.
But not for the reasons you think. I can’t do that to my mother.
She’s going through enough. If something happened to me, she’d break, and she’s so close to it already, it would take but one more teeny thing before she crumbles.
Me being kidnapped and sold into sexual slavery would .
. . well . . . you know.” I waved my hand in front of me and looked around the room for my clothes.
“But you are also very, very wrong. There are things . . . people who are worth everything, including putting yourself in danger to make sure that they are taken care of.”
“Chloe.”
I ignored the pain I heard in his voice and carried on. “I’ll figure it out. I always do. And I’ll be there for Poppy today because I love her and you’re right—she needs me there. But while we’re doing that, we will not be discussing where my money went.”
“Who did you visit yesterday?”
The stab to my heart was hard to push aside.
“None of your—”
“Who did we visit yesterday?”
“None—”
“Who—”
“My father!” I shouted, and watched Ryan’s torso swing back.
“Baby,” he whispered.
Then it happened. Exactly what I knew would happen. It was the exact look I never wanted from Ryan.
Sympathy.