33. The Botanical Garden
“So,tell me about Brazil. Pretend all the stuff that happened between us didn’t exist. Just tell me about your life as if you were telling your stories to someone brand new, someone you’ve never met before,” Gia suggested, curious about Ben’s life over the past decade—a life focused around a dream she, too, had hoped to follow.
“Well, it wasn’t just Brazil. The truth is, I was all over the place for quite a while—Australia, Africa, other countries in South America. I can’t even name all the countries and different regions I’ve been to off the top of my head. Of course, some are more memorable than others, but the fact is, it all started to feel like a blur. My work allowed me to meet some amazing people, and I learned lessons I would never have otherwise learned, but after a while, when the novelty wore off, it still felt empty. That’s when I knew it was time to go home.”
“Home to… here?”
“Home to here, yes. But then, when I found out you were divorced, home to… well, you… became more the goal,” Ben admitted, taking a deep breath as he realized the change of subject to something lighter had taken an unexpected detour. Nevertheless, he continued. “You’re the only person who ever felt like home to me, Gia.”
Gia’s eyes glazed over as she fought back tears of emotion over the impact of his words—words she would have begged him to say years ago. But that was before he left her behind to have a baby alone while he headed off on his personal adventures. “You felt like home to me, too, Ben. Until you didn’t. Because you left. I had to hate you to get over you. At the time, it was the only way. Eventually, the hate faded into more of a bitter understanding. We were both young. It was scary. It was terrifying for me, too. But, still… you just left. It’s hard to just forget that.”
“You’re right. We were young. I was selfish and stupid at the time. I couldn’t fathom pausing my dreams for anything. I couldn’t handle the idea of creating new dreams, or worse, of being trapped here in this town forever.”
“So, instead, I got trapped here.” Gia glanced at Ben, her hands tightly knit in her lap, thumbs pressed against each other, tapping nervously.
“Do you still feel trapped?”
“No. I love it here now. I have my children, home, garden, and friends. I left the high school Gia behind long ago and started over in the same place with a new life. Then, when I divorced, I did it all over again—and now I couldn’t imagine leaving everything I’ve built. This place is my strength.”
“I don’t want to leave either. Not anymore. I’ve been gone long enough…” Ben’s voice grew softer and more timid as he added, “But do you ever feel like anything is missing?”
He reached his hand across the center of the vehicle, stretching his fingers out to intertwine them with Gia’s. She tensed her shoulders and pressed her lips together, afraid—but intrigued—by where all this was leading. In the interest of finding out, she let Ben hold her hand.
“Sometimes, when it’s quiet after the kids have gone with their dad or are at school, when the garden work is finished, and I have nothing pressing to do for work or any other distractions, of course, I get lonely.”
“Do you ever think of me?”
“I’ve tried to avoid it for many years—but lately, you’ve given me no choice,” Gia said, a small smile forming at the edges of her lips.
Grateful to stop the conversation before it could potentially take a turn that could destroy their date, Ben pulled his hand gently away and raised his arm, pointing ahead of them. Gia glanced up and out the window, wishing her hand was still in his momentarily. “We’re here!” she exclaimed, taking in the massive welcome sign with “Botanical Garden” printed on it, surrounded by decorative floral art. Beneath a banner read “THIS MONTH: Rare Plant Show!” Gia felt giddy. She could barely contain her excitement.
“Indeed, we are. Perfect timing.” Ben chuckled. “Saved by the garden, I guess.” He pulled off the road, driving up the long driveway leading to the garden’s parking area, then quickly finding a space, given their early arrival.
“You ready?” Ben asked.
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Gia said with a grin.
“Alright, let’s do this!”
Ben exited the vehicle, walking around to Gia’s side as she gathered her belongings, then pulled the door open and offered his hand to help her out. Together, they walked down the wooded paths leading to the main garden entrance, still holding hands. The garden itself hadn’t even started, and already Gia felt her senses getting lost in the magic of nature and botany—the sights and smells of the outdoors. They knew the way by heart. She and Ben had visited this place often, but she never returned after he left. It reminded her of the past—a past she’d worked hard to forget or at least push as far as possible from her mind. When she accepted the date, she figured that if Ben was back, the past was already standing at her feet, staring at her square in the eyes, so what the hell? Why not?
“Remember the Rainforest Rarities plant show?” Ben asked, bringing Gia’s thoughts back to the present.
“How could I forget it? We practically lived here that month!” Gia said, feeling a slight ‘butterflies’ sensation dancing in her heart as she remembered the dream-like time they had spent together before she learned about Aiden. She tried to push the feelings away.
“We did. It was pretty amazing.” Ben squeezed her hand gently, and despite her concern over the rapidly growing attachment she felt pulling at her, Gia returned the squeeze. It felt weird to be back in this garden with Ben, with their lives under such different circumstances, but she couldn’t deny that she was enjoying it.
Gia and Ben finally arrived at the main gate and purchased two tickets to the garden and the extra rare plant show add-ons. When Gia offered to pay for half, Ben immediately turned the offer down. “No, no. You should know me well enough to realize I don’t want any of that woman power stuff on dates. I respect you without it, I promise. Now, let me be a gentleman. My treat.” He handed his card to the woman behind the gate, and she swiped it.
As Ben accepted it back and put it in his wallet, Gia couldn’t help but notice the black “VIP-status” credit card. Is there something I don’t know about him? She thought back to his fancy car and dinner at Charmed to Table. He certainly didn’t seem to be struggling, but none of that mattered to her, anyway. She’d learned to make it on her own, and a man with money was equal to a man without in her eyes—the only thing that mattered was love and, possibly even more important, trust. Unfortunately, trust was still seriously lacking with Ben based on their past.
Once inside the botanical garden, Gia and Ben were mesmerized by the myriad of colors and fragrances that overtook their senses, blurring the lines between art and nature. They walked silently through the garden as if the trove of plant life and bright blooms, perfect pops of color amidst the verdant greenery, had stolen their words. It was an impeccably curated homage to the natural world and the wonder of its flora. Some paths gave off a more natural, local woodland vibe, highlighting native species in their full glory, while others were carefully manicured as gardens from exotic landscapes around the world—including stunning rose, orchid, Japanese and British Gardens. Greenhouses throughout the grounds housed the tropical plants in their perfect growing environment, allowing them to thrive.
By the time they reached the structure that housed special events, including the rare plant show, Gia and Ben felt deeply content. The mix of earthy and fragrant floral aromas had left them reeling, feeling dizzy and almost drunk with their shared passion for the garden”s beauty.
“I forgot how much I loved it here,” Gia said, smiling happily.
Without time for a second thought about whether it was the right or wrong move at that moment, Ben released one of Gia’s hands and placed his fingers beneath her chin, lifting it until she looked him in the eyes. “Gia… I will never forget how much I loved you. How much I still love you. How much I will always love you.”
Ben’s words took Gia by surprise. They certainly hadn’t followed the rule of sticking to the present during the date, but some things, she guessed, just had to be said.
“Ben, I?—”
Before she could finish her sentence, Ben wrapped his free arm around her waist and pulled her in, brushing his lips against hers quickly, then moving her head downward, resting it against his chest with her body tightly held in his embrace. Stunned, Gia thought about pulling away, but everything to her core told her to stay—to just exist in the moment for once.
After a brief pause, Ben leaned slightly downward and whispered against Gia’s ear, “I’m sorry, Gia. I’m so sorry for everything. Please forgive me. I promise I’ll make it all up to you. Everything. Whether we are together or not, I’ll make it up to you.”