Chapter 60 – Mabel
Chapter Sixty
MABEL
Lola’s jaw drops so low to the ground, I can see her tonsil scars and Elle had this sheepish look on her face, like she can’t believe she’s even suggesting I could be pregnant.
Which is completely impossible by the way.
I’m extremely diligent when it comes to protection. My condom stash has a condom stash. Jude and I have never…
Shit.
Double shit.
My stomach flips again but this time has nothing to do with nausea.
“There was one time…” I trail off because I can’t confess to Elle that the only time I’ve ever raw dogged it was after I snuck Jude into my house after her wedding. Blood returns to my face as my embarrassment grows, completely overshadowing the possibility that Elle is suggesting.
“One time?” Lola squeaks out, it seems like this might be a bigger shock to her than it is to myself or Elle.
“Yeah, when Jude spent the night a couple of weeks ago.”
I let that statement hang in the air between the three of us. Elle’s eyes widen and she points an accusing finger in my face.
“Did you…did you get fucking pregnant on MY wedding night?” Elle’s tone is so incredulous and her face aghast at the idea someone else was getting busy on her special day. The laugh bubbles out of me before I could even think of even attempting to hold it in.
Laughter quickly turns into tears and I couldn’t stop my broken response, “I think so? Maybe, probably.”
That seemed to finally shake Lola fully out of her shock. “Good lord, Mabel. How did you go from a rim job to getting pregnant ?” Out of everything we’ve discussed this evening, of course Lola would be stuck on me eating Jude’s ass.
“Well, it wasn’t at the same time!” My face was flushing even more in the direction of this conversation.
“Yeah, let’s put a pin in the possible pregnancy thing for a moment, explain the transition from there to there. Or better yet, how did you even get all up in there?” Elle held her hands out in front of her, cupping some invisible pair of butt cheeks and twisting her head from side to side.
“Do I need to draw it out for you? I think I have some sticky notes in my junk drawer.”
I was joking but Elle started to turn on her heels, “Don’t be gross!
They have videos you can watch if you’re really curious.
” That seems to hold them off, for now. Knowing these two and all the hell I put Elle through when things had been starting off with Patrick, this is definitely going to come up in the future.
My stomach echoed my panic with another flip of nausea.
Yeah, talking about eating ass was going to be off the table for awhile.
And eating ass, sadly. If I am pregnant, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know licking an asshole could be potentially dangerous for a growing baby.
Not that eating anything sounded appealing to me right now.
“Well, I’m in no condition to go anywhere. Which one of you two is buying your big sister a pregnancy test?”
Turns out, someone bought Elle a Costco sized pack of pregnancy tests as a wedding present.
I was half-worried about Patrick knowing Elle was stopping home to grab a pee stick and immediately coming back to my place but when he heard Elle was coming over, he decided to hang out with Mama at the Big House.
“How do I even do this?” I can’t help holding the plastic contraption away from my body. I’m putting on an act, I know exactly how to do this.
When I was pregnant before, I think I took twenty tests to confirm.
I don’t want to admit it but once Elle suggested that I might be pregnant, my heart sank and every memory I had tried to forget came rushing to the forefront of my mind.
I was never this nauseous but the exhaustion is almost identical to how it was years ago.
I don’t know what to think about what additional symptoms might mean.
“What do you mean how does it work? You fucking pee on it. Then you wait for the lines.” Elle pushes me into the bathroom, slamming the door shut.
I’m alone, standing in my panties and a t-shirt.
My heart is pounding, my stomach flipping like a gymnast, and of course my bladder takes this moment to remind me it’s about to burst. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. I don’t think I can do this.” Tears blur my vision, I close them to keep any from falling and try to calm myself with deep breaths.
“I don’t hear any peeing in there!” Elle’s voice makes me jump. I can hear Lola’s voice but can’t make out the words.
“Alright, hold your horses. I’m doing it.”
Positive.
No, I can’t be pregnant.
I can’t go through this all over again.
I can’t do this. I can’t.
“That’s it, we’re coming in!” Elle’s voice breaks through my anxiety spiral but the words don’t sink in.
Tears are flowing freely, I’m sitting on the floor with my knees pulled to my chest. My arms wrapped around my legs is the only thing holding me together.
The plastic of the test is cutting into my palm, I’m holding onto it so tightly.
“Oh, shit. Elle, call Jude.”
Warmth presses against my side. “Hey, Mabel, it’s okay. Whatever it says, it’s going to be okay.” Lola whispers in my ear, soothing sounds that I refuse to listen to.
I can’t do this again.
I can’t.
“Can’t do what again, sissy?”
I didn’t think I said it outloud but, fuck, I can’t tell them. I can’t talk about it. I can’t do this. I shake my head, close my eyes and hide my face with my arms and hair. “Shhh, it’s okay. Jude’s on his way.” I don’t react to her words but a small flicker of calm washes over me.
Lola stays by my side, rubbing my back and occasionally whispering reassurance. I don’t know how much time passes before noise from outside of the bathroom pulls me out of my head.
“I don’t care what’s going on. I need to see her. Where is she?”