Chapter 22
Zhen
I’d admit to being more than a little bleary around the edges this morning. Booze would do that to you.
But, well, we’d more than deserved the celebration, and how often did I get to drink with my buddies?
We rarely gathered in a group—I normally only saw these guys one or two at a time.
Everyone had ended up crashing at my house, too drunk and too comfortable to move, so couches and blankets had been passed out last night.
It made for a lot of hungover people this morning.
My wonderful wife served myself and our guests coffee and cinnamon rolls the size of my head, which was a delicious breakfast I for one wouldn’t turn down.
I chomped, drank coffee, and admired how put-together she was this morning.
I felt like something her huodou had dragged in. After playing with it.
Kris finally sat and ate her own breakfast but eyed all of us like she was plotting, and oh god, she wasn’t going to make me do responsible things today, was she?
“Who among you is sober enough to help me create a little more content for the group this morning?”
Gramps raised a hand. “I am. I did not indulge yesterday.”
He took enough medication that drinking wasn’t really advisable. I forgot sometimes he was getting older since he did things like cage Annabelle with nothing more than spoken words and sheer force of will.
Bailey lifted a hand. “I’m good to go.”
She also hadn’t drunk a lot. Bailey hadn’t grown up with alcohol in the house, and claimed that was why she’d never really gotten the taste for it.
Which usually made her designated driver.
She’d actually come back this morning to grab the people left on the couch, but she also wasn’t turning down cinnamon rolls.
“Excellent, I’ll start with you two. We’ve done a whole course on precautions to take, which has been getting really great responses, but now we’re getting questions on why some precautions don’t work across the board. Why, say, using a shamanic talisman won’t ward off Christian demons.”
Gramps’s mouth slowly slid up into a smile. Talking theory and mythology was his legit favorite thing to do. “We can do a whole series on that alone.”
“I bet. Let’s go into the library. I’ll set up cameras and turn you loose for an hour.
I’ll figure out how to edit that down into segments later.
” Kris turned to Bailey. “We’ve also had questions about all of you, what specialty each of you have, so after I’ve filmed Gramps, can you do a quick segment on what your strengths are and what kind of spookems you tackle? ”
“Sure, would love to. Ah, let me actually put on makeup if you’re putting me in front of a camera.”
“You’ve got time.”
Kris, Bailey, and Gramps dispersed. I was sure Kris would have everyone talk about their specialties before they left. She was just giving the rest of us this morning to recover from yesterday.
Reed slurped down his coffee and looked at me with these suspicious, squinty eyes. “Your wife is a morning person, isn’t she?”
“Naw, bro, not at all. I’m the morning person. But today is hangover morning.”
“Oh.”
Morgan reached for a third cinnamon roll. “Still can’t believe we had to take down Annabelle. I wish that caretaker Catholic priest had let us exorcise the doll. I bet with all of us here, we could have done it.”
I wasn’t sure about that, but I’d damn well have liked to try.
Unfortunately, at the suggestion, the priest had come unglued.
He’d immediately said no. The church was apparently making a lot of money from touring the doll all around the world, and they were in desperate need of funds.
Boohoo. Seemed a poor-ass reason to me to keep something that dangerous locked up in a box. But hey, not my call.
Also figured they’d finally sent a priest in now instead of when we’d actually needed one. Bastards.
Although if I had to battle the doll again, I’d “accidentally” destroy it, or damn well try. I would not be doing this a third time.
Jo Jo sipped coffee, eyeing me sideways. “I really want to deal with Jasha’s sword tomorrow. Not today, my head’s ringing, but I take it Kris wants to film that, too?”
“She does.”
“Fine by me. Hopefully I don’t screw things up on camera, though. We’ve had instances were nothing goes to plan.”
Reed had just taken a bite of his cinnamon roll and choked while laughing. After coughing for a second, he managed, “Dude, when have we ever had a battle plan survive first contact?”
“We’ve had one!”
“Yeah, when?”
Jo Jo had his mouth open on a protest, but his brow furrowed as he struggled to recall at least one instance. Failed.
“Our track record speaks for itself.” Reed snorted. “Our plans never quite go to plan, but at least at the end of the day, we win the battle.”
If we hadn’t, none of us would be sitting here, but I left that thought unspoken. We had a good vibe, no need to bring it down with reality.
People started bickering about times their plan had almost worked—or would have if a certain someone hadn’t flubbed it—and I let them roll.
They were having a good time, after all.
I stood, rinsed my cup, and loaded it in the dishwasher.
Kelly got up to also load her dishes, and she poked my shoulder after she finished.
“Hey, Zhen. Um, not sure if you know, but I asked Jasha out on a date last night.”
Synapses misfired. “Wait, really?”
She nodded rapidly, clearly happy. “Yeah.”
“That’s awesome!” I had no idea Jasha was her type, but I was glad the attraction was mutual.
She looked relieved. “I figured if Kris was friends with Jasha, he had to be cool in your books, but is he?”
It was a fair question. “Look, Jasha’s one of the most trustworthy guys I know, and I’d actually been hoping to introduce him to one of you guys.
He and Kris were roommates in college. Since I’ve met him, shit has hit the fan multiple times, and he was always right there in her corner, supporting her however she needed it.
He’s going through some big life changes right now and could also use a partner who’s in his corner.
If after a few dates you think you two can make a go of it? I couldn’t be happier.”
Excitement and happiness brightened her face, and she rocked on her feet. “I’m so glad. It’s rare I meet a guy I like. I mean, the long distance will suck, but hopefully it isn’t a deal-breaker for him. I’m due to fly out in a few days, so we’ll see how things go from here.”
“By the way, Jasha’s due back over here tomorrow for curse breaking on his sword.”
Kelly winked. “No further hint needed. I’ll be here looking pretty.”
“Good, good. I’ll go help Gramps with his interview. He’s probably never done something like this before, and it’s easier with two people.”
“Sure. Tell Kris I can do a segment after I shower.”
“Yup.”
I sauntered from kitchen to library and, sure enough, they were all set up with Gramps in the big EasyChair again, visibly floundering.
“I am unsure of where to start?”
“Why don’t I act as co-star,” I said, coming to sit on the couch next to him. “Kris, here, set up my phone to record me. That way you’ve got a good angle on both of us.”
As she set ring light and phone up, I told Gramps, “I can feed you questions. I have a better handle on what people have been asking, and how to go keep the interview bite-sized.”
“Oh, sure,” he said with obvious relief.
Kris gave me a personal mic to clip on my T-shirt’s collar, and then she stood back and hit Record on both phones. “You’re live.”
I smiled at the camera. “Hi, Zhen Barre here. I’m with Reverand William McDonald, who is one of the most well-respected demonologists in the community.
He did us a huge favor by coming in to help capture and re-seal Annabelle.
Since we have him, let’s pick his brain a little.
Gramps, we’ve had a lot of questions from our viewers about why protections and seals aren’t universal.
Why can’t we use a shamanic talisman from China against a Christian demon, for instance? ”
“In a word, intent.” Gramps settled back, hands steepled in front of him as he took the question with ease.
“For one, those talismans and protective charms were not designed to just block out anything bad. They were designed to handle something very specific. That is why, if you go to a demon hunter’s house, you will see more than one protection up.
You will see a whole collection, because they understand those protections can handle one or three things, but not everything in the book.
Zhen, I counted twenty-six protections up around your house. ”
“There’s actually about forty,” I corrected. “Some of them are on the grounds themselves. That’s something else inherent in the design of these protections. Some of them are meant to ward an entire area. Some of them are specific to a house or a doorway.”
“Quite right. Now, this ties into why we have different specialists. Demonologist, for instance. I am called when a Christian demon has been running around being very naughty. But you would not call me for, say, a Rakshasa, because that is not something I am trained to tackle.”
Kris flashed me a handwritten sign of anything universal?
“We did get a question asking if there is anything universal that could thwart a baddie. Yes and no?”
Gramps nodded. “There is not, but on the other hand, there is. There are a lot of crossovers between mythologies, and a few things which seem to be universal. Salt, for instance. Lining a doorway and window with salt will serve as a good barrier against many things. Holy oil or holy water, which can be blessed in many religions.”
Kris kept feeding us questions, we kept answering, and by the time we wrapped up, there was a lot of content for Kris to parse through.
Gramps let out a breath and gave me a smile. “We did a good job.”
“We absolutely did. Want to do another one later about demons and what the signs of them are?”
“Oh, that is a grand idea. I would love to.”
I told Kris, “Kelly is up for grabs today, too, so what if we give Gramps a break, let Bailey and Kelly do their thing?”
“Sure.”
I went back to the kitchen to clean breakfast remains up, get the dishwasher going, all that good stuff. Gramps followed me for another cup of coffee and hovered at the island as I finished up.
“Zhen. About your friend Jasha. I do believe I know what type of mage he is.”
I fumbled the dishwasher pellet, and the thing became this slippery ball I damn near dropped three times. I managed to catch it, then stared at him wide-eyed. “You do?!”
“I studied his aura for a long while last night and conferred with a colleague earlier this morning, but I believe so. He is an illusionist.”
My attention locked onto Gramps as my belief system took a beating. “You’re kidding.”
“Quite certain.”
“But aren’t illusionists all descended from a trickster type god?”
“In an extremely diluted form, yes. With his Norse ancestry, I would bet it’s Loki.”
I let out a sound similar to a balloon releasing air and kind of sagged against the counter. My big gentle giant, art-loving friend was a descendant of Loki?! “Holy garbage fire, Batman.”
Gramps softly chuckled. “Yes, I sat with that for a good hour before I could wrap my head around it. And I do not know the fellow as well as you do.”
“How powerful is he?”
“Not very, at this stage, but he has done nothing to build his power, either. I bet if he starts practicing, his magic will build into something very usable. Not overpowered, but something he can utilize for protection and daily life. Is there no one magical in his family?”
“Not that he knows of.”
“Ah, well, it does skip multiple generations. I suppose that is not unexpected. I am surprised he has not realized he had magic until recently.”
“I don’t think he was exposed to any until he moved to Demonbreun.”
“That alone to me is telling, that he moved here. He had no friends, no relatives, but of all places in the world, he set up an art shop here.”
Y’know, the man made a really good point. Demonbreun was a hotbed of supernatural activity, so most sane, normal people didn’t choose to live here. It did say something that Jasha had. Kris was a little different; she’d come here to stay with him until she’d gotten her financial feet under her.
“I think the awakening of your wife and the exposure to the ley lines here all influenced his own magic to awaken. I do not know how powerful he will get, as that is largely up to him, but I do know the potential for being well-versed in his magic is there. Help me share the news, will you?”
“Absolutely, you can count me in. I don’t think he’ll take it badly, though. If anything, he'll probably think this makes the most sense. Illusionists are artists, in their own way, after all.”
“An excellent point.” Gramps sipped coffee and eyed me for a moment.
“I am going to give your wife a crash course on how to block a demonic possession and how to root one out once it has taken hold. Most hunters are specialists, but since your wife is support, I want her to be a jack-of-all-trades.”
“Tiffany was already talking book exchanges last night, so I’m not the least bit worried if Kris wants to learn. But why train her and not me? I can pay attention too!”
Gramps rolled his eyes and left the kitchen, not even deigning to respond.
“Meanie!” I called after him.
I heard a loud scoff but still no response. Surely adult me would pay more attention than teenage me. Right?