4. Klever #2
I knocked softly on the door before nudging it open. Usually, I would have respected her privacy, but I was almost certain that she was still dead to the world. I understood that but she needed to eat.
A smile lifted my cheeks as I got closer to the bed.
Sage was stretched out with her arms thrown out above her head and her mouth hanging open like she was getting the best sleep in the world.
She had changed into an oversized T-shirt, which was riding up her thighs almost making me abandon the task at hand.
Balancing the tray in one hand, I adjusted my pants to make room for the parts of me that didn’t care about helping me heal Sage’s heart. I set her breakfast down on the table and leaned over to kiss her cheek.
“Wake up, beautiful,” I urged, gently shaking her.
She rolled over and smiled when she noticed the food. Pushing up on her elbows, she shook her head.
“Why are you so good to me, KD?”
“Because you’re my wife, and I love you.”
“You shouldn’t. I’m clearly fucked up. I still hate myself for tricking you into that shit in the first place.”
“You know damn well you didn’t have to trick me into anything. I loved you from the first time I laid eyes on you.”
She blushed so hard that it was adorable. “You were eleven.”
“I was in love.”
“You should have signed those annulment papers, Klever. I never meant to keep you trapped in that shit forever.”
“I’m not trapped, baby. What part of that don’t you understand?”
“You felt sorry for me. I can’t blame you. I was pregnant and pitiful, wondering how the hell I was going to be a good mother when my own mom was so shitty.”
“And look how you turned out. You’re one of the best mothers I know.”
“Thank you.”
“Eat up. I need you to be fueled up.”
Her eyes lit up, but she took a deep breath to temper herself. “OK. We really need to get that paperwork done while you’re in town, though. Don’t try to change the subject.”
“I told you not to worry about that foreclosure.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about. You should have signed those papers.”
“I’m not talking about that now or ever. As far as the foreclosure goes, you can stay here or finally come live with your husband. Actually, it’s long overdue.”
“KD, I’m not your responsibility. I keep trying to tell you that.”
“How the fuck not? We’ve been married for ten years. I’m more than responsible for you.”
“I’m trying to set you free. I don’t understand why you won’t just let me.”
“And I’m trying to show you how happy we could be if you would just stop fighting me, baby. All this time I’ve been waiting for you to realize what your life is supposed to be, and you rather settle for less.”
“I don’t wanna . . . I can’t.” Her shoulders rose and fell as she dug into her omelet.
“Can’t what, baby doll?”
“I can’t handle you looking at me differently, K. I can’t handle you deciding that I’m not what you expected. I cannot handle you leaving me too. I rather set you free before you hate me.”
“I would never leave you, Sage.”
Her eyes were fixed on her food as she spoke. “K, everybody leaves eventually. I know I’m a lot. I understand that not everyone can handle me. I don’t want you to get tired of me like everyone else. I don’t think I could live with that.”
“Baby.”
“It’s fine. Hmph, do you know the last time I saw my mom?
I don’t. I realized that I have to learn to stop depending on other people.
I care about you enough to know that I don’t ever want to reach a point when I can’t remember the last time I saw you.
I don’t want a life that doesn’t involve you loving me, Klever. ”
“Look at me,” I said, waiting for her to lift those big pretty eyes before I continued. Once I got my fix, I continued. “I will never ever stop loving you. The problem is you have to learn to love you too.”
“I love myself, but I also know I’m fucked up.”
“What about me?”
She smirked. “You’re fucked up too.”
I chuckled as I pushed to stand on my feet. “You know that’s not what I meant, but I’ll take it.”
“This is really good, by the way. I thought you didn’t eat meat. Please, don’t tell me you bought these for me. I feel guilty enough for dumping my shit in your lap once again.”
“I’m vegetarian. I eat eggs, just not meat.”
She frowned at my response. “Isn’t chicken considered poultry?”
“Technically, but many vegetarians eat eggs and dairy.”
“Oh, you’re just a part-time vegetarian.”
“I guess you can say that.” I laughed.
“Thank you either way. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to say that enough.”
“You don’t have to keep thanking me, Sage.”
“Yes, I do.”
“Well let me let you finish eating. I’m going for a run. I’ll be back in thirty minutes.”
“OK. I should be going with you, but I’m not even in the mood.”
“Running actually helps clear my head, but I agree; you’re probably not in any shape to run. You just went to bed,” I said, turning to leave the room.
“KD?”
“Yeah, baby?” I asked, glancing over my shoulder.
“I love you too. I always have.”
“I know, baby doll. Eat up and get yourself together for me. Three doors down, enter your birthday as the code and be waiting for me when I get back.”
The smile that lifted her cheeks had me suppressing a laugh.
I needed to get my head in the right place for what I had in store for her.
I hadn’t forgotten about that punishment.
Now I had to add trying to divorce me to the list. I didn’t know what the hell she was thinking, but this was death row.
The only way out was if one of our makers called us up out of this bitch.
Otherwise, we were locked in for the duration.