Chapter 26
Chapter Twenty-Six
Bizzy (Elizabeth)
When I was small, I remember my mom saying that when my heart started to beat really fast, it was inner applause, like my body was cheering me on.
The memory makes me curl into a ball and cry harder. I miss my mom.
That painting… The Divinities… made me feel terror. Sheer terror. Since seeing it, I’ve been having nightmares of being chased, of feeling deceived, crushed…
I don’t understand it.
But it’s affecting my relationships with Rett and JJ. Since it happened, I’ve seen the worried looks, felt the quiet assessments. I imagine they’re slipping away from me. That the Transitive Progressive Tyre Disorder is going to drive them away, whether they know about it or not.
I quickly wipe away my tears and clear my throat when there’s a knock at my door.
Pulling the door open, I’m met with Rett’s gorgeous face and another bouquet of flowers. The third this week.
“Hey, you.” I open the door wider.
I’m disappointed that JJ isn’t with him, but I don’t want to hurt his feelings by showing it.
He proceeds to complain about Hart for several minutes. “He’s acting like… like he’s obsessed.”
“Is he on something?”
“Yeah, my nerves.”
He sits at my desk, noticing the half-hidden sketch under a textbook. He pulls it out. “Did you draw this?”
I realize JJ and Rett don’t know about my art.
“It’s not that great.” I tuck it away in a drawer.
“Yeah, it is. Biz… that was amazing. Can I see more?”
Cuteness aggression. He tries to tickle me into submission, which only leads to kissing and roaming hands. I reluctantly pull away, feeling unsure about doing this without JJ.
Instead of questioning me, Rett asks how I’m feeling. “I think you should get seen. There’s that virus…”
“Rett, if you think it may be the virus, then you’re infected now, too.” I laugh at him.
I just can’t tell him.
I’ve been sad, terrorized, and lost. Rippley ran away. Siler called me an obligation. I won’t lose Rett or JJ. Not if I can help it.
He resorts to entertaining me, putting on music and shuffling around the room, chanting, “More passion, more energy, more footwork.”
May this kind of love attack me forever.
“Huge fan of your parents’ work,” I tell him as he flops down next to me on my bed.
Stone corridor with torch lights.
I hear the echo of a door shutting behind me.
He calls to me, “Run, Bizzy, run… get out of here…”
Why… why is Aaron telling me to run?
I put my hand in my pocket. The message is still there.
My legs burn as I run.
Rounding the corner, I look behind me.
No… oh my God… no!
I wake up in a sweat, looking around in fear, realizing I’m still in my dorm room.
Rett left after I started to doze off, hoping I’d get good sleep. Ha.
This is the first time a name has come to me. Not the mystery man, but someone who feels just as important.
I pick up my phone, wanting to text Siler, then thinking of Rippley…
I open social media, where I never post, but I’ve gone to Rippley’s page before to watch his crew videos and dances with his little sister. His last post breaks my heart all over again.
“What’s not meant for you will disappoint you a thousand times until you understand.”