Chapter 28
Chapter Twenty-Eight
L ila
I hurry into the party and follow behind Skye as she leads me into a small room. She gives me a quick hug.
"You look pretty."
"Thanks." I'm a little bit nervous as I look around the small room at all the different costumes. "How many different women are there going to be here today?"
"It's just the three of us. It's just a bachelor party for some guy that's marrying like a cousin of the Kennedys or something. I don't think it's going to be crazy."
"Oh, wow. Cool. So what exactly am I expected to do?"
I feel a little bit guilty about being here, especially as I haven't told Max. In actuality, I really had wanted to call Skye and tell her that I changed my mind, but I knew she was depending on me and I didn't want to let her down.
"So you'll be in the cake and then you'll pop out and be like, 'Surprise, happy bachelor party!' and then we'll all do a couple of little dances around and then we see where it goes from there. You'll be fine." She picks up a bikini top that has two half coconuts. "You're going to put this on."
"A coconut bra?" I stare at her in shock. "You're kidding, right?"
"I'm sorry, but this is the costume. I'm thinking the guy had something for Hawaiian girls or Tahitian girls or something."
"But I don't look Hawaiian or Tahitian."
"But you'll look close enough with the coconut bra," she says hopefully, and I just laugh.
"And please tell me I'm not wearing a thong."
"Well, you are wearing a thong, but…" She holds up a grass skirt. "This will be covering it, so it’s not like you’re just shaking your butt cheeks for the world to see."
"Why does this feel so wrong?" I ask as I stare at the attire I’m expected to wear.
I cannot believe I'm going through with this.
"1,500 reasons why," she says. "Besides, it'll be good music. I chose the playlist and it'll be fun and you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. These men can't touch you and they're not going to be expecting anything crazy. We're not like strippers, you know?"
"I guess not."
I think back to the previous evening and the phone sex I'd had with Max and how I'd stripped my top off. I blush slightly.
"Hey, you okay? You totally zoned out there."
"Yeah, I was just thinking about something else."
"Oh no, not about Max and his pregnant ex-girlfriend, Marie."
"Oh my gosh. I didn't tell you. That's not his girlfriend or his ex or anything."
"Do not tell me it's his wife. If it's his wife, you should sue."
"No, it's not his wife. It's his sister."
"His sister?" She looks at me for a couple of seconds. "So he doesn't have a pregnant anybody?"
"No. He's just helping his eighteen-year-old sister out."
"Oh, now I like him. Dang it. I didn't want to like him. I wanted to hate him as much as I hate Kingston."
"I know. Kingston does sound like a bit of a jerk."
"Girl, he's more than a bit of a jerk. Anyway, so you and he are back on or…?"
"I mean, I wouldn't say we're back on. It's not like we were anything, but we're at least talking again."
"Are you sure it's just talking? Did you fuck him again?"
"No, but we did have phone sex yesterday and it was amazing."
"Phone sex?" she says. "How amazing can phone sex be?"
"When you're doing it with Max Spector, oh my gosh. It's definitely better than real sex I've had with some guys." I laugh. "Though, I don't know if I would ever say that to their faces."
"Oh my gosh. If I had phone sex that was better than real sex, I would tell all of my jerk-off ex-boyfriends exactly how much better it was. Anyway, we should talk about it later. You want to hang out after the event?"
"Yeah, that sounds great. I'm so glad that I met you that day."
"Me too. To think, before that audition we didn't even know each other and now we're the best of friends."
“We really are. How's Juniper by the way? I haven't spoken to her in a while."
"I think she's busy writing her book and her boss is a jackass too. In fact, we should probably start a club like The Horrible Bosses Club or something."
"We started that already. Remember?"
"I know, but we never had an official meeting and this was my way of reminding you of that."
"Oh, my bad. Sorry."
"It's okay. I suppose you don't think Max is so bad anymore."
"He's still a little bit of a jerk. I mean, I like him, but he's not the best man I've ever worked for. Not that I've ever worked for anyone that I loved. I mean, not that I ever worked for anyone I was sleeping with, but anyway, let's chat later."
"Yeah." She hands me the clothes. "Change into these, and when you're done, let me know. I'm going to put you into that box over there."
"Oh, is that the cake?"
"Yeah. When you hear me tap on it four times, that is my signal to you to jump out and do a little dance. Okay? I'll point out the bachelor to you when you get out."
"Okay. That sounds easy enough. I hope I don't mess up."
"You'll be fine," she says. "You're a natural. You're an actress. Pretend you're on Broadway."
"I suppose," I say. "The case of The Billionaire Bachelor."
"Or you could pretend that you're in a murder mystery a la Agatha Christie."
I giggle. "I've been watching this British TV show called Death in Paradise , and I guess I'm just thinking about different cases from that show."
"Oh my gosh. I love Death in Paradise . Have you seen Beyond Paradise as well?"
"No, not yet. Is it good?"
"It's so good. I just love Humphrey. It's a little bit more depressing than Death in Paradise , but it picks up. I'm so excited for more episodes."
"Oh, I can't wait to watch it." I smile at her. "Maybe we can have a murder mystery marathon one day."
"Oh, definitely. I love British murder mysteries. The cozy ones though. Not the dark ones. Have you seen McDonald & Dodds ?"
"Oh, yeah. McDonald & Dodds is cool. Sometimes I just think to myself, what is she thinking? But then I'm like, I'm not British and I'm not a detective solving murder mysteries, so maybe I just don't get it. She's a great actress though," I say.
"Yeah, she is." Skye gives me another quick hug. "Okay, change. Get into the cake, and then the party will get started."
"Sounds good."
I quickly take off my clothes and put on the coconut bra and the black thong and straw skirt. Nothing feels comfortable, but I suppose that's how life goes. I get into the box and I'm glad I'm not claustrophobic because it smells weird and it's dark and it's very warm. I hope I'm not going to be in here for too long.
After about five minutes, I feel the box being moved into another room, which is much louder. I can hear music and conversations, but I can't quite decipher what anyone's saying. I wait for the taps and think about what I'm going to do when I get out of the box. What sort of dance will I do? Should I sing?
My mind drifts to Max. I feel happy. It's weird how happy. I shouldn't feel this ecstatic, but knowing that Maria's his sister has just taken a burden off of my shoulders. Not that he's my boyfriend, or that we're going anywhere, but the fact that he's been texting and calling me has to mean something.
I hear the four bangs on the side of the box and take a deep breath before I push up and jump out. The room is full of eligible, good-looking bachelors and I just start dancing around. I hear the Sabrina Carpenter song Please, Please, Please playing, and I move my hands to the beat of the rhythm. My blonde hair bounces up and down and I feel the coconuts shifting back and forth. They're barely holding my breasts in. I hope to God they don't slip off.
I move to the right and dance around the room singing along to the song. I spot Skye pointing at one guy and I head over to him. He has a huge grin and red lipstick all over his face. I'm wondering who gave it to him. He certainly won't be getting any of my lipstick on his face.
"Are you the bachelor?" I ask as I stand in front of him. I speak in my best Marilyn Monroe tone and he grins.
"The one and only. I'm Jeremiah Crestview."
Jeremiah Crestview. I try not to giggle. What a name. He definitely came from money with a name like that.
"Well, Jeremiah, why don't you have a seat and I'll give you a treat."
Skye looks at me with wide, happy eyes, and I shrug, happy at the little rhyme I've come up with.
"Oh yeah, baby, take those coconuts off," he says as he sits down.
Another guy sits down next to him and I'm guessing it's his best friend. I start moving back and forth in front of them, shaking my ass and the coconuts without getting too close. The song changes to an Adele hit that I don't really think is appropriate for a bachelor party, but I'm not going to tell Skye that as she chose the music.
"Baby, shake those coconuts like your mama wanted you to," the bachelor says, and I try not to raise an eyebrow at him. He's a little bit of a jackass.
I decide to step away from him when he reaches out to pull and tug on my straw grass skirt. I see that there's a small little table and decide to get on top of it and dance. At least then they'd be getting a good view, but I wouldn't have to worry about them trying to touch me.
I move over to the table and start dancing around, happy when the music changes yet again to an Usher song. I close my eyes as I swing my hips to the beat, dancing around. I can feel lots of eyes on me.
"Oh, hey, we have some new guests."
Someone jumps up and I turn toward the door to see who's come in. My jaw drops as I see a shocked looking Max standing there in a suit. He looks devastatingly handsome as always. His eyes narrow as he walks toward me and I can feel myself feeling faint.
"Lila?" He glares up at me.
"Hi," I say, offering him a small little wave.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" he demands, and before I know what's happening, he's grabbing my waist and lifting me up and carrying me in his arms.
"What are you doing?" I cry, slapping at his chest. "I'm dancing."
"I don't think so." He carries me out of the room and into the corridor. "What is going on here? Is this the plan you said you had with your friend that you didn't know what was going on?"
"It's just like an acting gig. She wanted to help me out because she knows I want to be an?—"
"Dancing on a tabletop in a coconut bra is not an acting gig, Lila." He glares at me then pushes on a door, steps inside, and closes it behind us. We're in a small bedroom. He puts me down unceremoniously and glares at me. "What is going on?"
"So I promised my friend that I'd be a dancer for the day because they really needed someone and I thought it would be good practice for my acting and…"
He crosses his arms. "Really? And just how far were you willing to go for your acting?"
"I wasn't going to go far at all. I didn't want them to touch me. That's why I got on the table."
"You do realize they could see up your skirt and see your ass you were shaking it around."
"I mean, I'd rather them see my ass than them touch my ass."
"Who touched you?" he says. "Let me go out there and speak to them."
"No one touched me. It's fine." I pause for a second. "Hold on. You didn't tell me you were going to a bachelor party today."
"You never asked me if I was going to a bachelor party today."
"But you asked me to hang out."
"I did."
"But you had this event."
“And I was going to drop this event for you." He smirks at me. "However, it seems like you were not going to drop this event for me."
"I mean, I promised my friend and they needed another dancer and I didn't know you were going to be here."
"I didn't know you were going to be here looking so fine and sexy in two coconuts." He leans forward and gives me a kiss on the lips. "You look beautiful, by the way."
"You are just saying that because you want to get my coconuts off."
"Oh, I do want to get your coconuts off, but I'm not just saying that," he says, smiling as he touches the side of my face. "I've missed you."
"I've kind of missed you too. Just a little bit. Even though?—"
"Shut up while you're ahead, Lila," he says, smirking. "Sometimes we don't have to say everything we're thinking."
"So what are you thinking?"
"I'm thinking that I would love a lap dance from a sexy dancer in a straw skirt and a coconut bra."
"Really? But I just told you I don't allow any touching."
"But wouldn't you make an exception for me?" he says in a growl. "I'll pay you well."
"How well?" I say, winking at him.
"I'm not going to give you a million dollars to take those coconuts off, Lila."
"I wasn't going to ask for a million, though it would've been nice if you offered."
"Fine. I'll give you a million dollars to take those coconuts off," he says, laughing.
I just shake my head and push him back down onto the mattress.
"So what's next?" he asks.
"You'll see."
I jump on top of him and start gyrating against his pants. I'm pleased to feel a hardness between my legs. He's already horny.
"Someone feels like they've been a big bad boy."
"You want to call me a dirty daddy?"
"No, I want to call you a bad boy," I say as I pull off my coconut bra.
He licks his lips and immediately leans forward and takes one of my nipples in his mouth. "I've been waiting a long time to do this," he says.
"Fuck. You taste just as I remembered."
"I don't know that we should be doing this here," I say. "I’m supposed to be working."
"You do have a nine to five, you know…"
"I know I have a nine to five, but this is my second job."
"So now this is your second job?" He raises an eyebrow in challenge.
I continue gyrating my hips on his lap. "Yeah."
"Well, I'm going to offer you some advice, my dear."
"And what is that?" I say as he flicks his fingers against my nipples.
"I'm going to say don't quit the day job, because if your acting is as good as your dancing, you're not going to make it."
"You're such a jerk," I say. "You don't think I'm a good dancer?"
"I think you're okay. But don't make me report you to HR."
"Oh, yeah? I dare you to report me to HR."
I lean down and unzip him and pull out his cock.
"Oh, yeah? I can."
I pull my panties to the side and rub his cock against my clit, moaning loudly.
"Fuck, that feels good."
"How far were you going to go, Lila?"
He glares at me.
"Excuse me?" I say, lifting myself up, then lowering myself down on him.
He grunts as he grabs my ass and brings me closer to him.
"Fuck," I say as he slides completely inside of me.
"How far were you going to go with those other men?"
"All the way," I moan and then glance at him. "Oh wait. I mean, I want to go all the way with you." I giggle at his look. "What? You've just got me so confused right now."
"I've got you confused, huh?"
"Yes," I mumble as I bounce up and down on his lap, my breasts pushed against his chest.
"Oh, fuck yeah. That's so good. Oh, fuck yeah. Don't stop, Lila," he begs.
The door opens and the music comes flooding in around us. I still against him.
"What's going on, guys?" Max shouts over the ruckus.
"Hey, is that one of the strippers?"
I'm not sure who's there, and I don't want to turn around and look.
"Get out of here!" Max shouts.
"Hey, will you let us know when it's our turn?"
"Get the fuck out!" Max shouts, and his entire body shudders with the force of his yell. I find that I quite like primal Max.
"Okay, you don't have to hog the stripper all to yourself."
The door closes and Max pulls me off of him. "You're not working this job again. Do you hear me, Lila?"
"Says who?" I challenge, glaring at him.
I'm still horny and now I'm pissed off that I'm not even going to be able to come.
"Says me," he says. "I don't know what you thought you were doing, but this was not a good idea."
"I mean, I didn't know what I was doing either, so there’s that."
"You didn't know the guys would be hot and horny and want to rip your clothes off?"
"Well, Skye told me it’d be low-key."
"Not Skye from the office."
I bite down on my lower lip. "No."
"You're a terrible liar. We're leaving Lila."
"No, I?—"
"We're leaving, Lila."
"Fine," I say. "But before we do…"
"Yes?" I say as he lifts me up.
"I need to fucking finish what we just started or I'm not even going to be able to think straight."
He bangs my back against the wall and I hold on to his shoulders as he thrusts up inside of me.
"Oh yeah, this is where I belong. Deep inside of you."
"Don't stop," I whisper as he starts to fuck me hard and fast.
"Oh, I won't," he whispers back.
And as we bang against that door, I know that this is the second best fuck of my life.
"You really don't have to take me home, Max," I say. "I'm fine."
I stare at him with big beguiling eyes, trying to read his mind, because I certainly want to know what he's thinking after everything that's just happened.
"I want to make sure that you get home okay. Plus, I'm still mad at you."
"What do you mean you're mad at me? Why are you mad at me?"
"For putting yourself in a situation like that." He shakes his head.
"A situation like what? You weren't complaining when you were banging me up against the wall."
He shakes his head slightly. "It's not about that. It's about the fact that you were in a room full of guys, wearing a coconut bra and a thong, shaking your ass on a table."
"Nothing was going to happen. Skye?—"
"Well, I'm going to speak to Skye." He frowns. "Actually, I'm going to speak to Kingston, who's going to speak to Skye, because that's just not a good look for the firm."
"What do you mean it's not a good look for the firm?" I glare at him. "It's got nothing to do with the firm."
"She represents the firm, and?—"
"She doesn't represent the firm. She's barely worked there for a couple of weeks, just like me. And she makes good money from this. And I will absolutely hate you if you speak to Kingston and she gets in trouble when he's already not nice to her."
He stares at me for a couple of seconds. "What are you talking about he's not nice to her?"
"I don't know the full story, but he's kind of mean to her and I think she wants to…" I pause.
I can hardly tell him that she wants to quit. He does still own the firm.
"What were you going to say, Lila?"
"Nothing. Can we talk about something else?"
He pauses for a couple of seconds and strokes my hand. "I don't know what I'm going to do with you."
"I mean, you could always fuck me again," I say, grinning at him, and he chuckles slightly.
"You are going to get me into trouble."
"Only if you don't get me into trouble first," I say. The cab stops and we hop out. "Oh, so you're coming up?"
"Yes," he says, nodding.
"I still don't have much furniture," I laugh. "So it's not going to be super comfortable."
"It's fine," he says as we walk into the building and make our way up the stairs. "The elevator's out again?"
"Yeah," I say. "I guess I should be grateful because it's given me more definition in my glutes and my calves, but…"
"But you don't really want that definition, do you?"
I look back at him and laugh.
"Yeah, well, I mean…not because I have to walk up a bunch of stairs. I'd rather have it because I was going to the gym, and?—"
"You go to the gym?" he asks with a raised eyebrow.
"I don't know what that look is about. Are you saying that I don't look like I go to the gym?"
"No, I'm just saying that when we were at the spin class, it didn't indicate to me that you worked out frequently." His lips tremble.
"You're so mean, Max." I say, slapping him on the shoulder. "You're totally saying I'm out of shape."
"I'm not saying that you're out of shape. I'm just saying that you didn't seem to have a lot of breath when doing the sixty-minute cardio class."
"So you noticed that I was breathing hard?"
"I think the entire room noticed you were breathing hard." He starts laughing.
I can't stop myself from laughing as well. "You're making fun of me."
"Hey, I like to be honest with you, right?"
"Yeah, I guess I appreciate that," I say as I open the front door. "Come on in. Would you like a drink?"
He stares at me for a couple of seconds and shakes his head. "No. What I want you to do is grab your bag and pack some of your stuff."
I turn to him with a frown. "What are you talking about? Grab what bag and what stuff?"
"You're not staying here," he says, looking around.
My air mattress is flat on the ground.
"You deflated it this morning?"
"No, I didn't deflate it, but I told you before, it's kind of cheap so you have to keep blowing it up and?—”
“You're not staying here, Lila. This is a shithole."
I stare at him, feeling quite offended by his words. "It's not a shithole, it's my place, and?—"
"I know you love it, and I know it's the first place you've had by yourself and it means a lot to you, but this can't be comfortable. You have no chair, you have no couch, you have no bed. I'm not going to let you stay here."
"You cannot tell me what to do. I may be your assistant, but?—"
"I don't want you to stay here because I care about you, Lila." He grabs my hands and pulls me to him. He kisses my nose. "I care about you and your comfort and I want to spend the rest of the weekend with you."
"But I thought you said you had plans with your sister tomorrow…"
"I do, but that doesn't mean you can't join us."
"What?" I say, my eyes widening.
"I want to spend the rest of the weekend with you, and I'd like for you to meet Marie. I'm sure she'd love to meet you." He shakes his head in an exasperated fashion. "I mean, she might be a little bit mouthy and over the top when she does meet you, so just be prepared."
"What do you mean? Is she going to hate me?"
"Oh, no. I think she's going to love you. But she is going to go on and on and on about how I've been single forever, and how she never thought I'd meet a nice girl like you."
"What?"
"I'm just predicting that's what she's going to say." He laughs. "So grab a bag and some stuff and spend the weekend with me. I would spend the weekend here, but I really wouldn't be comfortable."
"Fine," I say. "You do know that when I get a couple more paychecks under my belt, I'm going to decorate and furnish this place, and you'll never want to leave, right?"
"We'll see," he says.
My heart soars at the words, because I realize that I've just talked about him coming here in the future, and he didn't get red or stammer. Maybe he does kind of like me. Maybe it isn’t just about the sex. Though, I don’t want to get ahead of myself. The sex is pretty fucking amazing.
"I'll just bring some clothes and some underwear," I say. "I don't really have much else to bring. Oh, maybe my laptop."
"Why are you bringing your laptop?" He tilts his head to the side.
"Because I have a crazy boss who likes to send me emails in the middle of the night asking me to do different projects, and just in case."
"I have a feeling your boss won't do that."
"But just in case," I say, grinning at him as I grab my laptop.
"Come on, let's go back to my place," he says, smirking as we walk back out the door. "Are you sure you're ready for my sister?"
"Are you sure you're ready for your sister to meet me?"
"Yeah."
"But then she'll know about us and it will really be out there, and?—"
"I don't care. I'm sorry that I told you previously that I didn't want people in the office to know, but I don't care. I want you to get to know my sister. I want you to be a part of my life."
I stare at him wide-eyed.
"What is it now, Lila?" he asks.
"I’m just surprised by your words."
"Why?"
"I don't know. Maybe because you don't seem like the sort of guy that would want a relationship."
I stammer over my words, because I've just put the R word into the universe, and I don't know how he's going to react.
"Who says I want a relationship?" he asks, and I feel my heart sinking.
Why had I mentioned it? Oh my gosh.
"So this is just about sex for you?" I ask.
He grins then, his eyes sparkling. "Are you telling me it's not about sex for you as well?"
"Oh, of course. It's all about sex," I say. "In fact, I'm trying to get you to impregnate me so I can be set for life, child support and all that."
He stares at me for a couple of seconds, and for a few dreadful moments, I think he thinks that I'm being serious.
"I'm just joking, Max, don't worry."
"I know that you're joking." He bursts out laughing. "I just didn't realize you had such a black sense of humor."
"Hey, I can be sarcastic and funny and comedic and scare the living daylights out of you all in one."
"Who says that you scare me?"
"You're telling me that me telling you that I was hoping you would impregnate me and make me set for life didn't scare you for even one second?"
"No," he says. "Maybe the thought of impregnating you doesn't scare me as much as you think."
"What?" My jaw drops and he bursts out laughing.
"I mean, not anytime soon. I just want to enjoy the practice."
"You are crazy." I shake my head, though my entire body is glowing. "Do you think we're…"
"Do I think we're what?" he asks as we walk to the side of the road and he holds his hand out for another cab.
"Do you think this is all moving way too fast?"
"Yes," he confirms, nodding. "Do I think that we're absolutely crazy?" He turns to me as a Yellow Cab pulls over. "Yes."
"Why thank you, Max. I'm glad to hear you think that."
He opens the door for me. "You can get in. I'll put the bag in the back."
"Okay." I say, as I slide into the back of the cab.
I wait a couple of seconds, then he gets in beside me and tells the driver where we're headed to.
"I just can't believe this is my life right now," I admit, as I stare at him. "Are we just two crazies?"
"Maybe." He shrugs. "But maybe you were right."
"Maybe I was right about what?" I ask.
"Maybe life is just one big romance movie and we're the main characters in this part."
"So I'm the heroine and you're the hero?"
"I'd like to think that is true. Why? Do you think I'm the villain?"
"No," I say. "I very much think that you're the hero. You're so handsome and hot."
I touch his thigh and lean over to give him a kiss on the lips. His eyes widen as he looks at me.
"And I very much think that you're the main part of my story," he says. "Ironically."
"Why is that ironic?" I frown slightly as I pull away, but he grabs my face and holds me close to him and kisses me hard.
"Because I never thought romance would be a central theme in my life," he says. "I always thought my book was more of a thriller, and now it's starting to become more of a romantic comedy."
"Oh. And you don't like that?"
"It's just something different," he says. "I thought I was more of a John Grisham, but it turns out I might be more of a Nora Roberts."
"No, darling, I think you're more of an E. L. James." I laugh.
He nods and kisses me again. "You might be right about that. So, shall I get a red room?"