Chapter 21
The front door closes. ‘Hi!’ Holly calls out.
I scramble to my feet. ‘Holly’s home.’
‘Did I say the wrong thing?’ she asks, using the side of the wardrobe to pull herself up.
‘Kate? Teri?’ Holly calls out.
‘Coming!’ I reply. ‘It’s fine,’ I say to Teri. She watches me as I gather the last of the banknotes and put them back in the box.
‘It’s an awful lot of cash,’ she says, still looking at the money.
‘Are you all right now?’ I ask. ‘Your ankle?’
She winces. ‘I think so.’
My heart drops. I think so.
‘You’ll be able to go home tomorrow, then.’
She gives me a tight smile. ‘That’s what we discussed. Yes.’ Then she puts on that face again – the concerned one. ‘You’re sure I didn’t upset you?’
‘Not at all.’
I shove the box back on the shelf.
‘Listen. I haven’t said anything to Holly about this, so please don’t.’
‘You didn’t?’ she asks, incredulous.
‘I haven’t had the chance.’ That part is true, but also I don’t want Holly to hear about this now. She might blurt something out. The very thing I was about to blurt out myself, in fact. He’s in the freezer.
I walk out of the room, letting her hobble after me.
I ask Holly about her drama class while doing my very best to behave as if everything is perfectly fine. But all the while, I am thinking, it’s her. I know it’s her. His mistress. What was her name? Did he ever tell me? I don’t remember. I didn’t care who she was. I just wanted it to end.
I think I love you. With a lipstick kiss…
Holly is saying something, but I can barely focus. The idea I could have confessed that Max is in the freezer, for Christ’s sake, makes my insides turn to liquid.
‘Do you have any homework to do?’ I ask Holly.
She looks at me.
‘What?’
‘I’m doing it now, Kate. What’s wrong with you?’ She lifts her textbook to show me.
‘Of course, sorry. Miles away.’ I turn around. ‘Can I help with dinner?’ I ask Teri, who is opening a bottle of wine.
She frowns at me. ‘It’s already in the oven.’
‘Of course. I knew that. Shepherd’s pie, isn’t it?’
‘Yes, that’s right.’ She and Holly exchange a look.
‘I’m going to prep some carrots to go with it,’ I say.
They both frown at me. ‘There’s no need,’ Teri says.
‘I want to.’
‘History, huh,’ Teri says, pulling up a chair next to Holly. ‘That brings back memories.’
Holly laughs. But immediately grows serious. ‘I have a test in the morning. I’m dying right now. It’s so hard.’
‘Let me take a look. You want me to test you?’
They pore together over the book, their heads almost touching. I can hear them, but I can’t understand a word they’re saying. That’s because I keep hearing Teri’s words ricochet in my head: that doesn’t sound like Max.
‘Are you all right, Kate?’ Holly asks.
I jump, then realise I’ve been peeling the same carrot for so long, it’s like a matchstick. I toss it in with the peelings.
‘Of course! Miles away.’ I point my peeler at her. ‘Now you keep revising, young lady. And hey, how about Scrabble after dinner?’
Later, after everyone has gone to bed, I lie there staring at the ceiling, wondering what madness possessed me to tell Teri so much. I feel like I was seconds away from handing her a grenade while explaining exactly how to detonate it.
Are you here for Max? He’s not home. Where is he? You won’t believe this. Wait till you hear what we’ve done.
I must have fallen asleep because I wake up, heart pounding, disoriented by whatever dream I was having. The house is dead silent, and I lie there, my eyes closed, trying to remember the dream that spooked me, when I hear someone breathing softly. For a moment I think it’s Max, but then I remember.
Max isn’t here.
I open my eyes. The room is pitch-black, with only narrow slivers of moonlight around the blinds. It takes a couple of minutes for my eyes to adjust, but when they do, I can just make out a silhouette standing in front of my open wardrobe.
Am I still dreaming? I hoist myself on my elbows. ‘Holly?’
The shadow moves, quiet and nimble as a cat, reaching the door just as a car drives by, casting patterns on the ceiling and I catch a glimpse of black leggings and a dark top.
It’s not Holly.
My mouth goes dry, and I realise I already knew that.
Wrong height, wrong shape. I open my mouth to scream, but the sound is lodged in my throat, and the shadow is gone.
I throw the blanket off and jump out of bed, my heart like a drum.
On the landing I catch a moving shadow on the wall downstairs, barely there.
I fling open Holly’s bedroom door. She’s fast asleep. I can hear her breathing softly. She’s fine. Thank God.
I hurry down the stairs in my bare feet. I don’t switch on the lights. I don’t call the police. I go straight to the spare bedroom because I know exactly who was standing there silently reaching into my wardrobe.
And I know why.
The door to Teri’s bedroom is ajar. She’s in bed, asleep, or pretending to be.
In two strides, I’m standing next to her, my chest heaving with outrage. I grab the edge of the bed covers and yank them away.
Teri screams. ‘Fuck, Kate! What the fuck! You scared the shit out of me!’ she cries, sitting up, gathering the sheet against her chest to cover her nakedness.
Her nakedness.
‘What are you doing?’ she shrieks.
‘I-I know it was you!’
‘Me what? What the hell?’
‘Just now, you were upstairs, in my bedroom. I saw you!’
‘I have no idea what you’re talking about, Kate.’ She smooths her hair out of her face. ‘Jesus! You gave me a heart attack.’
I stand there, wringing my hands together. Maybe I dreamed it. I must have. One of those lucid dreams you hear about.
I’m going mad. It’s the stress of everything. I’m at the hallucination stage of stress. Soon I’ll be taking my clothes off in the street.
I take a step back. ‘I’m sorry… I thought…’
She narrows her eyes at me. ‘Are you all right, Kate?’
‘Sorry. I had a nightmare. I’m sorry I woke you.’
‘That’s all right.’ She lets out a breath. ‘Go back to sleep.’
‘Yes. Yes. I should do that.’