May 29th, 2009
Toby
On my motorcycle, I’m going so slow an old lady who can’t see over her dashboard passes me on I-40. I pull into the parking lot and attempt to brush cat hair off my sports coat but then leave it because JerryAnn may not like me, but she liked Gordita.
Once I’m inside the massive non-denominational Christian church off of I-25, I don’t need to follow signs to the Rice/Tupelo wedding because I walk toward the music. As I enter a massive, open room, Queen belts out “We Will Rock You” and I stand in the doorway taking it all in. Half of the room is set with circular tables, cream tablecloths, floral centerpieces, and other typical wedding stuff, but on the other half, a basketball hoop has been lowered from the ceiling, a volleyball net is up, and a giant old man tosses a football from across the reception hall.
I follow the path of the football, where it lands in James Rice’s massive hand. Next to him is Natalie, next to Natalie is Cate, and next to Cate is JerryAnn. My breath catches. She’s wearing a green top and whispers something to Cate, and then her head turns and our eyes meet as a volleyball collides with my shin. I lean over, pick it up, and hand it off to a little girl. When I look up, JerryAnn is gone.
The room is crowded. Several of the girls from our basketball team circle me with hugs and questions about next year and whether I’ll coach again, but my eyes and thoughts are searching for JerryAnn. The girls disperse as I study the crowd. A few people are dressed formally, but most wear jeans, t-shirts, or jerseys, and one guy is dribbling a basketball and wearing a t-shirt, bowtie, and shorts. It’s Milo. He sees me, grins, and waves. I navigate through the tables, where cloth napkins sit on dirty plates as people lean back in their cloth-wrapped chairs and reminisce.
Buffet tables are filled with appetizers, desserts, and trays of donuts, but I stroll past all of them. Mom’s advice, come algo , eat something , holds no power over me. I know what I need. I need JerryAnn.
I find my way to the bride and groom, who stand in front of a white floral-wrapped arch. James strikes me on the back. “Amigo, I wasn’t sure you’d come.” He narrows his eyes at me then scans the room. “Milo’s here.”
“Yeah, I saw him.” Milo sinks a free throw. James searches, and so do I. Where’s JerryAnn? I reach my hand out to James and say, “Congratulations.”
James grins, bends down, and kisses the top of Natalie’s head. “I’m the luckiest man alive.” My hand hangs untouched until James releases Natalie, grabs my hand and squeezes hard enough to cut off my circulation, and with a clenched jaw, he ekes out the words, “Congratulations to you, too.”
My mouth opens to explain myself when a big guy nudges me out of the way and pulls James into a hug.
Cate slips next to me, not close enough to touch, but close enough to hear. “If you’re looking for reception ideas, you won’t find a wedding more original than this.” I turn and face her as Queen’s jock rock favorite is replaced with Pachelbel’s “Canon in D.”
“Mom and James couldn’t agree on a theme, so anything goes.”
I smile at Cate who’s in green too, like JerryAnn, but she’s wearing a dress with flowing fabric and purple Converse on her feet. I’ve missed Cate and almost pull her in for a hug but know better. I follow her line of sight to a chocolate fountain. She smirks. “I bet you’ve never seen a chocolate fountain that close to a ping-pong table.” They’re feet apart, and the chocolate fountain is surrounded by kids. “Yeah, we’re nothing if not original.” My mouth opens to speak, but Cate speaks first. “I know what you’re thinking.” What I’m thinking is, Where’s JerryAnn? And she knows it. She nods. “You’re thinking, how many ping-pong balls have fallen into that fountain?”
I don’t care about ping-pong balls. I want to know if the kiss she planted on me meant anything to her.
Cate bounces on the balls of her feet. “Eight. Eight chocolate-covered ping-pong balls are floating around in the fountain. A little boy purposely dropped two in there, and the rest arrived naturally.”
I force a small smile, lean close, and whisper out the side of my mouth, “Cate, where’s JerryAnn?”
Cate rolls her eyes. “I haven’t seen you in months, and you don’t ask how I am, how is school?”
Cate’s standing in the line, but she’s tucked herself away from the steady stream of well-wishers. I narrow my eyes at her, but play along. “How’s school?”
“It’s over. Just ended yesterday, but then, you know that. I have a 4.0, despite Miss Rose and family consumer science.” She glares at me, then her gaze follows Milo on the court.
He’s improved, less sloppy in his movements, and even more confident, which is saying a lot.
“As for my love life, Milo tried to kiss me a few days ago, so I gave him a fat lip.” She smirks. “He’s proud of it, but not as proud as I am of my fist.”
I smile and nod.
“Mom got married, so there’s that.” Her words are clipped and angry. “JerryAnn and I are going to live together in her apartment for the summer.” She looks over at James, who has picked up Natalie and is kissing her on the lips. Cate cringes. “That way JerryAnn and I don’t have to swallow back stomach acid for three months.”
My eyes search the room—the exits, all seven of them, the tables, and the basketball court—and I wonder if I imagined JerryAnn. When I turn back, Cate’s arms are crossed, and she’s glaring. She shrugs and looks down at her shoes. “She’s not here.”
I raise my eyebrows. “She didn’t show up to her dad’s wedding?”
Cate’s shoulders and head sag. “She doesn’t want to see you.”
My shoulders sag, my posture matching Cate’s. JerryAnn is here, but she’s hiding from me.
Cate lets out a puff of hair from one cheek. “Look, ever since she went to see her mom, she’s been different, she’s become…” She cups her hand around her mouth and whispers in my ear, “Emotional.”
I raise my eyebrows as if to say, “So what?”
“She cries at everything: movies, commercials, TV shows, and even her dumb romance novels.”
I run my fingers through my hair. “She doesn’t want to see me because she’s emotional?” I just broke my engagement with Rose. I can deal with emotions.
Cate puts her hands on her hips. “You’re an idiot.” She faces the ping-pong table and brushes me off with a flick of her hand. “Run along back to Miss Rose, and you two can share a chocolate-covered ping-pong ball.”
A couple in the line approaches Cate and talks with her about school. She is cordial, sincere, and very un-Cate. As soon as they pass, I step back up to Cate, who scowls at me. “Have you been in a wedding line? You walk through the line, and then you go eat something from the buffet or play basketball or whatever it is you want to do at this circus that is my mom’s wedding, but you don’t cut back in line.”
A family is heading toward Cate, so I act quickly and grab her arm. She flings me off with way more force than necessary, but I have her attention. “Rose and I aren’t engaged.”
Cate steps back. “What? When?”
“Seven weeks ago.”
She puts her arms out. “Why didn’t you lead with that, you weirdo?” She points at a door behind the line. “Jerry’s in the mother’s lounge.”
I run out the door into a hallway and study doors until I find the one with the right label. The room is dark, quiet, and empty, but a chair with its back to me is rocking so I whisper, “JerryAnn?” The rocking stops. “Cate told me you were in here.”
“Traitor,” JerryAnn whispers and stands. Her lips are pressed in a thin line, and her eyes sparkle in the near darkness. I forgot how tall she is—okay, I didn’t—but she’s wearing heels and dress pants that make her legs seem infinitely longer.
She folds her arms across her chest. “Why are you here?”
Like an idiot, I stare. There are lots of ways to answer her question: to kiss you, to tell you how I feel, to let you know my engagement is off, to beg you to love me, to see you. I clear my throat and point with my thumb at the opened door. “I thought this was the mother’s lounge. Am I in the wrong place?”