Chapter 15 #2
Imani is laughing and crying at the same time.
The kids have stopped running and are staring at the adults like they don't know what's happening, but they know something's happening.
Amara puts her hand on the side of my face for one second.
"Welcome home, Emiliano."
She lets me go.
Brick is the first one to reach me.
He doesn't say a word. He just pulls me into a hug, his hand fisted in the back of my cut.
I hug him back. He pounds my shoulder twice and lets me go. "Took you long enough," he says, his voice rough.
I grip his shoulder. "You and me both."
Mateo crosses the courtyard slowly with his cane.
Imani is at his elbow, but he waves her off when he gets close.
He stops in front of me and extends his hand.
I take it. His grip is weaker than it would have been before Diego, but the steadiness in his eyes is real.
"Thank you," he says quietly. He doesn't say what for. He doesn't have to.
I hold his hand a second longer. "Anytime, Mateo."
Imani hugs me without asking.
She smells like jasmine and Brick's aftershave, which is something I'm not going to think about.
She pulls back and pats my chest right over my new patches. "I told you," she says, smiling. "I told you they knew."
Compass comes next. He's still in his prospect cut, the same prospect cut I wore yesterday.
He claps me on the back with the awkward respect of a younger brother. "You showed me how to do this, man." He swallows. "I mean it."
I knock my knuckles against his prospect rocker. "You'll get there."
He nods and walks away before he has to feel anything else.
Lashes makes it across the courtyard with Mei holding her elbow.
She wraps both arms around me with her belly between us. Her face is wet when she pulls back. "Hope is going to know your name as one of her uncles."
I can't find the words for that one. I just nod. She pats my chest and goes back to her chair.
Xiomara wraps both arms around my legs from the side. I almost don't notice her until she tugs my hand. "Doom?"
I crouch down.
She digs into the pocket of her dress and pulls out a folded piece of construction paper.
She hands it to me with the seriousness of a woman handing over a state document.
I unfold it.
It's a crayon drawing of a man with a bandana and a beard, standing next to a girl with long brown hair and a heart over her head.
Underneath, in Itzel's handwriting because Xiomara can't write English yet, it says: Doom is family now.
I look at her. Her eyes are huge. "You made this for me?"
She nods seriously.
I fold the card carefully and tuck it into the inside pocket of my cut. Where I can feel it against my chest. "Gracias, mija."
She beams and runs back to Itzel.
Twenty minutes later, I step out the side gate alone.
The street is quiet.
The sun has been down for an hour and the desert is starting to cool.
I pull out my phone and angle it down at my chest.
I take a picture of the new cut. The bottom rocker. The patches.
I send it to Wren:
Patched today. - Em.
I put my phone in my pocket without waiting for a response.
She said she’d reach out, but I had to share this moment with my sister.
I head back inside.
Nova is at the food table when I get back inside the courtyard.
She's pouring herself a drink, her back to me, her hair down.
I cross to her without thinking about it.
I put my hand on the small of her back and she leans into me before she even turns around.
"Hi," she says, looking up at me.
I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "Hi."
I tip my chin toward the side of the courtyard, away from the music.
She sets down her cup and follows me to the corner near the gardenia bushes by the wall.
The party noise is still close but the lights are dimmer here. A pocket of quiet.
I put my hands on her waist. She puts her hands flat against the patches on my chest. "You look good in this cut."
I press my forehead to hers. "It feels different."
She lifts her chin so her nose brushes mine. "It is different."
For a second I don't say anything.
I just stand there with her, my hands on her waist and her hands on my chest, the music behind us, the gardenia in the air, and the lights from the courtyard catching in her hair.
"Eres mi vida," I tell her. My voice has gone low and quiet. "I want you to know that. I'm wearing this cut tonight because you walked into Amara's office and told her the truth. Tu sabes eso, verdad?"
Her eyes are wet but she doesn't blink. She slides her hand up to my jaw. "Sí."
"I would've taken it off and walked away if it meant losing you. I'm wearing it because I didn't have to choose. Because you chose me back."
She presses her palms flatter against my chest.
"Emiliano."
"Te amo, mi vida. Más de lo que sé cómo decir."
She doesn't answer in words.
She goes up on her toes and kisses me, and somewhere behind her one of the brothers spots us and whistles. Boulder yells something I can't make out over the music.
She laughs against my mouth.
"Te amo, Emiliano."
I pull her into me. Her cheek presses against the new patches on my chest.
My arm wraps around her back.
The bottom rocker pulls between us, and she can feel it against her skin through her dress.
"Eres mía," I tell her into her hair.
Her hand fists in the back of my cut. "Soy tuya."
We rejoin the party.
Boulder makes a toast that's half roast, half real, and the brothers laugh so hard Ruby has to wipe her eyes with her apron.
Kelsey brings out a cake she's been hiding in the kitchen all afternoon.
Razor takes over the speaker and queues up music that gets the kids dancing and Ruby pulling Zorro out into the middle of the courtyard.
Nova dances with Lashes. Then with Imani. Then with me, her cheek against my new patches, my hand in the small of her back, while Brick watches us from across the courtyard with something on his face I'll think about later.
Amara catches my eye from her seat next to Dante. She lifts her beer.
I lift mine.
That's the only thanks she'll take.
The music keeps playing.
The string lights glow against the stone walls.
The full family in one place, eating, laughing, and breathing the same desert air.
I look around the courtyard.
This is family. Not the one I was born into. The one I built.
Tomorrow we'll go back to work.
Amara’s right. The Kodiak MC isn't going to stay quiet forever, and the war that's coming is going to test every brother in this courtyard.
I'll wear this cut into it the same way they wear theirs.
But that's tomorrow.
Tonight, Nova's head is on my chest and the patches on my back are mine.
My phone is quiet in my pocket because Wren hasn't answered yet.
She might, and even if she doesn't, I'm not alone.
I'm home.