Chapter 2
Rafe
S he came in a little late. She was new.
Most of the class had been around for a few weeks, and some had come back from last year.
I would’ve remembered her if I’d ever seen her before.
Her eyes were wide and dark, like she was nervous or scared.
She kept to the back of the room. She never volunteered for the demonstrations.
Maybe she was trying to scope out the class and decide whether to come back or maybe she was just anxious.
Either way, I knew it was my responsibility to make her feel welcome.
If she didn’t feel comfortable in my class, there were other instructors I could refer her to in the city.
People didn’t come in for defense classes if they weren’t afraid.
A very small percentage of students just wanted to be prepared.
The rest had something in their past or present that spooked them into wanting to be able to fight back.
I knew the look on her face, though. She didn’t hide it well.
It was naked fear. I didn’t know what had happened to her, but I did know she needed help.
Whether it was from me, a different instructor or a trauma counselor, I was going to put her in contact with the right people .
When class ended and some of my students came up to chat, I took a long drink from my water bottle and excused myself.
She was going to slip out the door before I even got her name.
I felt instinctively protective of her—professionally, of course.
I quickly caught up to her in the gym, all the TV’s blaring and the thump of feet on the treadmills drowning out any possible conversation.
“Excuse me,” I said. I didn’t reach out and touch her—didn’t even raise my voice.
She turned to look at me, eyes still insanely wide and looking like she’d done something wrong.
“Are you okay?” I said.
“I’m fine. Thanks. Um, great class,” she said, shifting her weight from one foot to the other.
“I’m Rafe,” I said.
“Yeah, you introduced yourself to the class. I listened.”
“Of course. And you are?” I smiled and asked.
“I’m Lexi Conners.”
“Good to meet you,” I said, putting out my hand. She took it tentatively, as if she was reluctant to touch me.
“I learned a lot,” she said, “I may come back on Friday.”
“I hope you do. Listen, you looked a little freaked out in there. I’m done here and I thought I’d see if you wanted to go grab a cup of coffee.
I can answer any questions you have about the class.
And if this class isn’t a good fit for you, I can recommend another one about six blocks over.
The teacher’s a friend of mine. It’s a woman, if you’re more comfortable with women,” I offered.
“I don’t have a problem with men,” she said, “But I’m okay. It was nice of you to be concerned.”
“The diner is right next door. They have great pie,” I said. I wanted her to say yes, but I wasn’t going to pressure her, especially if she’d been hurt or threatened, she didn’t need that. So, I stood back and waited.
“I like pie,” she agreed. “I guess I have time for one cup of coffee. I’m not in a hurry to get home just yet. I had a long day.”
“Great,” I said.
I grinned. I couldn’t help it. I knew that it was just business, that I was taking an interest in what she hoped to gain from a self-defense class, how to help her adapt her lifestyle to improve her safety. But I felt a rush of excitement, like I’d just picked up a really pretty girl.
“I’ll meet you there. I just need to run in here for a second,” she said, indicating the women’s locker room.
I went next door to Lacy’s and got a booth where I could see the door.
I held the laminated menu in front of me like I was really reading it even though I’d eaten there at least twice a week for the last few years.
When Lexi came through the door, I stood, lifted a hand to wave.
She saw me and came to the booth. Her hair was down.
That tight ponytail was gone, and in its place was a cloud of soft, shiny dark hair spilling over her shoulders.
I couldn’t take my eyes off it. It seemed almost indecent, like I was seeing something so private.
She took a menu and scanned it, “I didn’t really eat lunch today so I’m starving.”
“Well, you said it was a long day. You were probably too busy to get hungry,” I said.
“Not really. I was just—not in the right frame of mind to eat anything.”
The waiter came over and took our order. I was having coffee and pie, and Lexi was having a patty melt with bacon. Extra fries. I admired her order, making conversation .
“I think if you’d come here and just ordered tea or a salad, I’d tell you to have some protein so you could get stronger for self-defense purposes,” I said.
“The bacon ought to take care of that. Bacon makes you strong, right? Or was that spinach?” she joked.
“I think it’s kale,” I said.
“I hate kale. My supervisor at work makes kale chips at home and brings them in to share like it’s some big treat. I want to know who the joker is who came up with that idea. Like how about we bake some lettuce and see if anybody eats it?” she said.
I laughed. She was funny. I told her how I got interested in teaching self-defense as our food arrived. Lexi nodded along with my story while taking a huge bite out of her burger. I snatched a salty fry before she could protest with her mouth full.
“You know that’s why I want to learn that nose strike from class. So I can take down anyone who tries to steal my fries.”
“You’re pretty protective of your carbs.”
“Yeah, don’t try to talk keto around me. I love potatoes. And bread.”
“Relax, I’m not trying to take away your starches.”
“You’re a personal trainer. I figured you’d be all serious about the protein powder and the super foods.”
“Hello. I’m eating pie,” I said, pointing to my plate.
“Maybe you’re trying to lure me in with bait and switch. Tell me I can eat pie anytime I want as long as I follow the workouts, and then once I’ve signed up for a zillion training sessions you tell me I can only have raw blueberries and spelt.”
“Spelt? ”
“Yeah, it’s a type of flour used for bread. I saw it on TV. It sounded healthy and boring.”
“I’m not trying to get you to sign up for anything, don’t worry. I just think in my line of work it’s better to be safe than sorry. I wanted to check with you and see what motivated you to come to the class tonight.”
“It’s a situation over at work. It’s been difficult before, but it got a little intense today. I thought, like you said, better safe than sorry.”
“Is there anyone you can talk to at work? Get you out of the situation?”
“Not really. I spoke with my supervisor. She’s great, but we’re understaffed to begin with, and now one of the other workers is out on maternity leave, so we’re spread pretty thin. I can’t just pile my case on a coworker.”
“Are you a doctor? A PA?”
“Social worker. I love my job, don’t get me wrong. I just—”
“I imagine you deal with all kinds of people. Some better than others.”
“Yeah, just like in any job, except it’s high stress to begin with, because I work for the agency that took away their kids. So, it’s hard not to be seen as the enemy.”
“So, is this a parent?”
“I can’t really discuss it. Privacy laws,” she said, taking a sip of water.
“Okay, so I’ll ask the right questions, and you can just say yes or no. Did someone threaten you with physical harm?”
“Yes.”
“Shit. Okay. That’s a pretty clear danger. Are we talking direct threat? The person said he or she would do something physical to you? ”
“Yes. Beat my ass,” she supplied, eating a fry. She was trying to say it wryly, like it was a funny story, but her hand trembled a little.
I wanted to hold her.
But that would be very unprofessional. Nothing I would ever consider doing.
Why had I even thought of it? The way she looked at me so determined to be calm, to seem okay.
I wanted to tell her she didn’t have to act so strong, that it was okay to be scared and ask for help.
I wanted to tell her that her supervisor should do something to keep her safe.
Like possibly shoot the guy in both of his goddamn legs.
I reached across the table where her hand rested beside her plate. I almost took her hand. At the last second, I swerved and stole another fry. It was a close call. I had wanted to assure her that she could trust me, that I would keep her safe as if I knew her, as if she were mine to safeguard.
I steered the conversation into shallower waters, told her about my self-defense training, how heavy the full simulation gear is and how many nut punches I took before I admitted I needed to wear the gear.
She laughed, completely at ease. It was amazing how well we got along, how easy it was to talk with her, to make each other laugh.
When I looked at my phone, I was surprised to see that we’d been there two hours. I told her what time it was. Lexi was shocked, too.
“You’re kidding. It’s like we just got here. I’ve been on dates where half an hour seemed way longer than this. Not that this was a date,” she said, flushing pink, seeming a little flustered.
“No. I know exactly what you mean. This was fun. Could I walk you home? Make sure you get there safely? ”
“I drove, thanks. If you want to be extra protective though you can walk me to my car,” she said.
We both stood up and I followed her out and down the block. She unlocked a little Toyota and got inside. She started it up and rolled down the window.
“Thanks for tonight. I feel a little better.”
“That’s good to hear, Lexi,” I said, saying her name just because I wanted to.
“Hey, I’ll see you Friday at class, okay?”
“I’ll see you then,” I said. I wanted to say something else, tell her to be careful or to lock her doors, but it seemed intrusive since we barely knew each other.
I walked home and found my best friend Leo already there.
“What, no fires tonight?” I said, popping a beer.
“No. I got off early. You, on the other hand, are out late. Did one of your self-defense girls need a little one-on-one tutoring in the locker room?” he joked.
“No, the opposite, you horn dog.”
“The opposite as in one of the self-defense guys needed one-on-one?”
I rolled my eyes at him, “No. There was a new girl in class. She stayed in the back and acted nervous. I wanted to make sure she was okay.”
“By nervous do you mean hot?”
“I mean nervous, like she was going to jump out of her skin if anyone even spoke to her.”
“Trauma victim?”
“Got threatened at work,” I said, sitting down beside him on the sectional.
“Ex-boyfriend?”
“Client.”
“Hooker?” he asked .
“Social worker. God, you’re a pervert. Does the Fire Chief know about your dirty mind?”
“He and I aren’t that close,” Leo said, “plus, I like girls. What does this one look like?”
“I dunno,” I said, setting my beer down on the table and rubbing my neck.
“You dunno?” he laughed, “You’re acting like we’re back in high school and you think I’m after your homecoming date. Just tell me what the woman looks like.”
“Dark hair. Big eyes like she was a lost puppy, at least at first. I swear to God, she looked like one of those woodland animals from a cartoon, all big eyes and eyelashes.”
“A cartoon. That sounds hot,” Leo deadpanned.
“I didn’t say she was hot.”
“You never said she wasn’t,” he said, “So apart from the frightened bunny eyes, what else does she look like?”
“She’s got dark hair—it was in a ponytail, but after I gave my speech about ponytails, she took it down. She’s small, but curvy. Hates keto, loves carbs. She ordered extra fries,” I said with a smile.
“Sounds like my kind of woman there,” Leo said.
I gave him some side-eye and drained my beer, “Whatever,” I said. I wasn’t jealous exactly. I just didn’t want Leo and his hound dog ways messing around with Lexi who already had a hard time considering the threat some client had made against her.
“What’s her name?”
“Lexi,” I said.
“Like Alexandra?”
“I dunno. She said it was Lexi.”
“Sounds like she dots her i’s with little hearts,” he said. I shrugged.
“I got an early session tomorrow. I better turn in. ”
“I think you don’t want to answer any more questions about Lexi. You’re acting so weird about it that she obviously got to you. You like her. Scared bunny rabbit Lexi who dots her i’s with hearts got to you,” he laughed.
“Fine, enjoy yourself. It’s total fiction,” I said crossly.
“You’re attracted to her. Just admit it.”
“I am, okay? We just met. I don’t really know her. We just got along great, and I like her. And she’s attractive.”
“There. That’s all I wanted to hear. Honesty is the best policy, Rafie,” he said with a chuckle.
“Go ahead and laugh till you piss yourself for all I care. I have to be at the gym at six. Good night,” I said, and went to bed.