Double Down (Erie City Hawks #2)

Chapter 1

ONE

“Want to tell me again why we’re doing this?

” I pressed on the brake, sliding my car into the guest parking space.

Looking over my shoulder, I stared at the school behind us.

The nondescript building had clearly seen better days, with peeling paint and rust gathering in the corners of the front doors.

On the higher levels, kids waved from the windows.

Shit, they looked so excited. And yet, I couldn’t hold back my grimace.

Not that I had anything against kids—hell, my five nieces were my entire world—but I had something against waking up at the crack of dawn on our one day off this week.

Cam just shook his head, tossing the bag at his feet over to me.

“Told you. Means a lot to Hadley. And with everything she has going on right now, it's the least we can do.” He pulled open the passenger door and climbed out of my car.

“So get your ass out of the car and put a smile on your face, D.”

I chuckled as I joined him, popping the trunk to grab the rest of our gear. “You’re beyond whipped.”

“Don’t care, man. She’s it for me, and I’m done playing it safe on the sidelines.” He grabbed the bag of signed balls we’d picked up at the stadium. “Anything I can do to make her smile, I’m gonna do it.”

I closed the trunk with an audible thud.

This kid was a fool. Sure, deep down, I was happy he’d finally admitted his feelings for Hadley.

Cam Seda was a lot like me when he first joined the team as an outfielder this season, full of pure love of the game and fierce determination to earn his spot.

But over the last few months, he’d also fallen for a new girl, one who just so happened to be his ex’s best friend.

Their situation wasn’t ideal, and for a while, they tried to hold back, but it was useless, and he’d finally let himself fall hard and fast for Hadley.

He dashed over to the school, smiling at someone waiting on the other side of the glass.

There was a lightness to his steps that hadn’t been there a couple of months ago.

It made even my calloused heart root for love, made me believe they’d make it through the trials and tribulations of our seasons.

But there was also a darker beast, one that warned of broken promises and long nights alone, of returned rings and fractured hearts. Our schedule—our lives—weren’t for the weak, and personal experience taught me most people weren’t willing to stick it out.

No one else understood why we’d pick love of the game over everything else.

Except for my sister, her wife, and my nieces, baseball came before everything else.

I’d missed birthdays, holidays, recitals; you name it, I’d had to skip it because of a game or training, but that was the sacrifice we had to make.

Baseball was more than a sport—it was my livelihood.

It helped me provide for my family while also letting me live out my wildest dreams. I’d sacrificed too much to get here to let go just yet.

Especially for something as temporary as a relationship.

Heaving the last bag over my shoulder, I joined the rest of the guys.

As they talked about our upcoming series in Colorado, I shifted toward our second baseman, Jace Lyons.

He stood off to the side, not bothering to make eye contact with any of the other players.

As I got closer, my eyes scanned his frame, checking for any signs of distress.

Dark circles lined his eyes, and his normally tanned skin had turned more pallid. He’d even lost weight over the last couple of months.

I frowned, unease and uncertainty creeping into my chest. It’d been almost two weeks since Jace confided in me about how the pressure was getting to him, the unhealthy ways he coped. He’d tried to clean up his act multiple times, but each night on the field stripped away a little piece of his soul.

What first started as small comments had shifted into loud outbursts, and it was beginning to mess with the team’s dynamic.

Jace didn’t have the best reputation when he joined the Hawks, and he wasn’t earning any allies with his gruff demeanor.

If you’d asked me a couple of months ago, I was ready to write him off too, but we’d spent some time practicing one-on-one, and I’d gotten to know the guy underneath the arrogant smirk.

Jace meant well, but he was lost, and as his captain and his friend, it was getting harder to sit by and watch him drain himself to the bone.

Sure, playing professional baseball was the dream.

Many people would never get to experience walking out to thousands of fans screaming your name, and I was so fucking grateful I got to live this life.

But if I’d learned anything over the past decade, playing at this high level wasn’t for the weak.

Getting called up to the majors was only the first half of the battle.

No, the other half played out once you got your shot. The desperation to keep it soaked deep into your bones. We saw it way too often—guys who worked their whole lives to get to this level, only to let the pressure destroy them once they had it in their hands.

As Jace nodded his chin up at me, I frowned. “You good?”

“Yeah,” Jace said, his voice scratchy. “Late night.”

“Seems like that’s been a trend lately.”

His eyes narrowed at me. “Been keeping track of me, cap?”

“Just checking in as a friend,” I said as I clapped my free hand on his shoulder. “If you need to talk to someone, try the team doc. They can recommend a therapist—”

“Don’t.” Jace’s throat bobbed as he looked around, making sure no one else was listening. His eyes darkened as he glared at me, his mouth twisting into a tight line. “Told you. I don’t need a fucking shrink.”

“Couldn’t hurt,” I said. “You can’t keep going this way, kid. You’re going to drown under all that pressure. Talking to someone helps. It sure as fuck helped me.”

Jace swallowed heavily as Cam and Parker led the rest of the guys toward the school. “I’ll think about it.” I frowned at him, and he just smirked. “C’mon, cap. I said I’ll think about it, and I mean it.”

Knowing when the battle was done, I clapped his shoulder and joined the rest of the guys.

They nodded as I walked by, calling out different versions of my title.

Team Captain. The shit still made me smile.

Most league teams didn’t bother with captains, but the Hawks were such a green franchise, upper management wanted a strong voice to get everyone on the same page.

As the most senior player, most people assumed I’d be their pick, but I didn’t believe it until Benny Weber, our manager, pulled me aside and asked if I’d lead these guys to victory. Fuck yes. I never questioned it, just automatically jumped in.

After that day, I’d made it my mission to make our team as strong as possible—not only on the field, but off it as well.

Too many guys burned out, and I didn’t want that to be our legacy.

We’d already implemented some changes to protect the players, including mandated sessions with the team therapist, but there was a lot more work to do.

Pressure mounted on my shoulders, but I pushed it down as we approached the school, buried it under an easy smile, like always.

The front door swung open, and a woman stepped out to meet us.

As her hazel eyes lifted, the breath stuttered out of my lungs, too captivated by the life circling inside her expression.

My eyes scanned the rest of her, unable to look away.

She wore a casual outfit—yoga pants that clung to her tight, athletic frame and a Hawks t-shirt that was a couple sizes too big.

My gaze trailed along her body; I wished I could pull it back and discover what curves were buried underneath.

“You must be the Hawks.” She beamed at Cam, reaching out her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Cam. I’m Brianna, or Mrs. Collier around here. I’m Hadley’s co-teacher. She’s told me all about you.”

“I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a warning,” he chuckled as he shook her hand.

As they spoke more about the day’s events, my eyes never strayed from our host. Brianna was on the taller side but still shorter than Cam.

She’d pulled her long, dark hair beneath a Hawks baseball hat, her ponytail sticking out the back end.

She’d dressed for a day with the kids, and it made me smile.

I’d spent my childhood at a strict private school, and the rules never would’ve allowed for a day like this one.

Too often, we got screamed at to keep our clothes clean, needing to present a certain front to the world.

But no pretense radiated from this woman—only pride over her school.

She looked over the rest of the group. “I’d say I know each of you, but that would be a lie.

My baseball knowledge is almost all borrowed from Hadley.

But sincerely, thank you for coming here.

We’re so excited to have you, and I can’t explain what this means to the kids.

” She swiped her badge and led us into the building.

“I don’t want to waste any of your precious time on your day off, so if you’ll follow me, we’ll get the stations set up outside, and then the kids will join us. ”

Brianna led us through the gym, and all of us took in the school and the kids clambering to get a peek at their guests.

I waved back at them, already feeling my smile building to match theirs.

Ah, fuck. Cam was right. This was what we’d always talked about doing, about ways to give back to the community we called home.

This neighborhood wasn’t the best, and from what Cam said, their budget had gotten drastically cut over the past couple of years.

But despite the aging building and less-than-pristine conditions, there was still a fierce protectiveness soaking the walls.

You heard it in how Hadley and Brianna talked about this place, how much they cared and loved the students who came through their doors.

“Okay.” Brianna clapped her hands as we exited the gym and stepped out onto the field.

“We’ve assigned each of you to a station, and you’re paired with a teacher.

If you need additional support, we have plenty of others walking around.

You can also always flag me down if you need something.

” She paced across the field to where a giant sign hung, displaying all our names.

“Each station will be about fifteen minutes, and then we’ll switch.

You’ll hear a bell signaling when it’s time to move on. ”

She lifted onto her tiptoes, searching the crowd. When Ken, our team photographer, stepped forward, she offered him a bright smile. “Before we get started, can we talk? We need to go over which kids can’t be photographed.”

As Ken and Brianna stepped off to the side, my eyes followed, unable to look away. A sharp crack hit my arm, and I scowled over at Cam as he stared daggers back at me. “Don’t even think about it, Ramos.”

“Think about what?”

“You know what,” he sighed, nodding in Brianna’s direction. “She’s married. Off limits.”

Disappointment rushed through my chest as I finally glanced down at her ring finger.

Fuck, there it was. Twin rings. How the fuck did I miss those?

It was always the first thing I checked, no matter what.

I might not do relationships, but I had a strict rule about meddling with attached women.

If you were looking to piss off your boyfriend or spouse, find someone else to fill your time.

I’d watched the other end of that situation too many times to bring that level of pain into someone else’s world.

I shook off any thoughts of Brianna, turning back toward Cam. “You know me, man. Not gonna go there.”

“Probably a good idea,” Cam answered, glancing around the field with a forlorn expression. “I wish Hadley was here. Fuck, I never knew I could miss someone like this.”

“She’ll be back, Cam. And when she finds out about what you’ve done,” I smirked as I leaned in, “you’re going to reap those benefits for years.”

He shook his head, but he couldn’t hide his grin.

“Not about that, D. She works so hard for everyone else. Teaching, helping out with Emilia, and everything she does for me. It’s a lot.

If I can take a little bit of the burden away, that’s what I’m going to do.

Even if she never knows about this, it’ll be worth it because it matters to her.

” He ran his hand over his face as if clearing that thought away.

“Gotta get set up before the kids get out here. You good, man?”

“Yeah,” I said, scanning the poster for my name. When I saw the name written next to it, I couldn’t help my smile. Collier.

Almost on instinct, I found her in the crowd, watching as she spoke with the team photographer and our social media manager. She smiled over her shoulder, pointing at the different areas the teachers and team had set up. Something pulled in my chest, forcing all my attention to Brianna.

Married. She was fucking married. The reminder soured all my thoughts, washing them away just as soon as they’d arrived. But no matter what I told myself, it didn’t stop the excitement that raced through me as she came over to join my station.

“So, Damien,” she beamed up at me, “ready to do this with me?”