14. Rae
Rae
I’m pretty sure I’ve lost my mind. That’s the only explanation as to why I’m in the back of Asher’s car and he’s climbing in. Am I going to sleep with him? No, there’s no way I’m going to, right?
Right?
Truly, I’m not sure because he has my mind a complete mess. Who’s Rae Colver?
I don’t know.
Right now she’s about to be, I’m sure, one of the many girls Asher has had in the backseat of his car. Yet, I’m not stopping this. In my right mind I know I should. Nothing good can come from this, absolutely nothing.
But my back is against the door, and Asher has crawled in after me, managing to shut the door behind him. He has a feral look in his eyes, and it should make me jump out of this car and never look back.
I can’t.
I don’t know who I am, but I want to find out. I don’t want to be good all the time. I want to do things that scare me and this is fucking terrifying. But I want it. Whatever it is.
“Take off your jeans,” he commands, his voice dropping an octave with the command.
A shiver runs down my spine at his tone.
My hands are shaking as I reach down to unbutton my jeans, sliding the zipper down and lifting my hips slightly to push them off.
Asher’s eyes watch with rapt attention as I slide them lower.
Apparently I’m doing it too slowly for him because he reaches out with his right arm, yanking them down the rest of the way.
I gasp, and he moves toward me, cornering me against the door.
His face is less than an inch from mine.
My heart is kicking in my chest, while I can also feel it lower while my clit gets its own pulse as his proximity makes me excited and anxious.
I know where we are, I know the possible consequences of being caught.
He parked around the back, there’s no lights nearby, but we’re still in public.
“Here’s what’s going to happen, Rae,” he practically growls. “There’s not a lot of room in here to do everything I want with you. And I’m down an arm for a couple more weeks. But my mouth is perfectly fine, so you’re going to sit on my face and not get off until I say you can.”
I swallow roughly, no one has talked to me like this before. I’m not a virgin, but I wouldn’t say I’m experienced. Every sexual encounter I’ve ever had has been…fine. Not a lot of dirty talk, and nothing like this.
There’s a small piece of my mind that feels guilty. I think about Grayson, he’s not here, but there’s something going on with us. But we aren’t official. And my body and mind are very interested in what Asher is offering right now.
I don’t move fast enough for him, because he’s wrapping an arm around me, and flipping us over so I’m on top of him while he lays on his back. I squeal at the movement, and try to balance on my knees above him.
Asher slides a finger underneath my panties, running it underneath the fabric, grazing my center. I know he can feel how wet I am. I squirm, trying to get away, but he yanks harder at my underwear so it bites into my skin.
“Do you like these?” he asks, his tone is taunting.
“I—I guess. I mean they’re my underwear so—” There’s a sharp pinch of pain as he rips them clean off my body. “Asher!”
“I didn’t really care if you liked them or not. I’m not letting anything get between me and this pussy.”
“Are you sure we should be—” I’m unable to finish whatever I was going to say because his mouth is on me, licking up my entire seam and I cry out, quickly clapping a hand over my mouth.
Asher chuckles beneath me, the vibration runs through my whole body and I moan into my palm again. It already feels so fucking good. Then, he sucks my clit into his mouth, and I whine, bucking my hips. Realizing I may be hurting him, I try to hover.
He wraps his arm around my leg, pulling me down onto him even as I try to fight it.
“You better fucking sit,” he growls, licking and sucking everything he can reach.
“I don’t want to hurt you more than you already are.”
“Fuck that. Nothing could hurt me while I have my tongue buried in your perfect cunt.”
I’m moaning and rubbing myself shamelessly against his mouth. I cry out his name, but it’s muffled by my palm still against my mouth.
He hums against me, and the sensation has me already close to losing my mind. The orgasm is already building low in my stomach, and I don’t know if I want this to stop.
“You going to soak my face when you come for me?” he asks before sucking so hard on my clit that I see stars.
“Maybe.” I doubt he can hear me from behind my hand, but my ears start ringing, and if he says anything else I can’t hear it because the release is consuming me.
I try to grab onto anything I can reach while coming so hard I swear I have an out of body experience. Asher doesn’t slow down at all as he continues to work me through the orgasm.
When it fades, I’m overly sensitive, but he doesn’t stop. I whine, and try to lift up again. This time, he lets me. I look down to see a smirk on his wet lips. He licks them, and my knees feel so weak that I’m worried I may collapse on top of him.
He slides out from under me, crowding my space again.
I look down at his mouth, wondering if he’s going to kiss me.
I want to kiss him, I want to know how I taste on his lips.
I’m scared to be the one to lean forward and close the small distance.
I don’t know why. He just had his tongue buried inside me, but I’m hesitating.
“Fucking delicious,” he groans, his eyes locked on mine. His hair is disheveled and I want to mess it up even more.
“Don’t you want me to…you know.”
He smirks. “Not yet. When that happens, I want you to be able to answer who Rae is.”
“But…”
I don’t finish; he’s scooting back and opening the door to get out. I’m stunned, unsure how to feel as I pull my jeans back on. Part of me wants to feel used, but he’s not the one that got to come.
The other part of me wants to feel powerful; that just happened and even though he was the one commanding me, I held all the power.
As I get into the front and he starts the car, the biggest thought that hits me is a pang of guilt. My mind goes to Grayson and what am I going to do?
What if I want both of them?
There’s no way they would be okay with that. We grew up with Chandler and the guys, our family isn’t strangers to polyamory, but this is different. This is…us.
“Don’t overthink it.” Asher’s voice breaks through my internal struggle.
“I’m not,” I lie.
“It’s okay to have some fun sometimes.”
I scoff. “I know that.”
“Good. Having fun can be a good way to figure out who you are.” He winks, and I feel the need between my thighs again, despite the powerful orgasm he already gave me.
He’s wrong, but I won’t tell him that right now. I’ve been having fun, and still don’t know who I am. Unless he’s only talking about the type of fun we just had.
Too bad I don’t think that should happen again.