Chapter 39 Scotty
Scotty
Istared blankly at the shadowy back wall of Millie’s bedroom, the outlines of her mounted flatscreen blurred in and out of focus beside a cluster of framed photos and overpriced art prints she insisted made the place feel cozy.
It had to be closing in on midday, but Millie’s blackout curtains kept the sunlight out, sealing me inside this perfect little misery den that suited my mood just fine.
Ella and Millie’s voices drifted in from the kitchen, talking in low tones that made it so obvious I was the topic of conversation.
I let out a groan and flipped onto my stomach, burying my face in Millie’s pillow with enough force that suffocation seemed like a viable option if I really committed. It smelled like apple pie and a hint of citrus from whatever fancy detergent she splurged on every month.
It was annoying the fuck out of me.
Because, on top of everything else, my body decided this was the perfect moment to remind me that quitting suppressants after years came with side effects.
Like heat spikes.
And cramps.
Deep, twisting ones that felt like someone had tied my insides into sailor knots and was slowly, methodically pulling them tighter.
I curled in on myself when another one hit, gripping the blanket and breathing through it while staring at the ceiling like I could negotiate a ceasefire with my own organs if I just focused hard enough.
Tossing my birth control out the window on the drive to Evercrescent had felt very empowering at the time. Very main character. Very I’m taking control of my life.
I realize now that Past Scotty was a fucking idiot.
Millie and Ella both tried to reassure me that my full heat wouldn’t hit right away, which calmed me down for approximately five seconds before they mentioned the occasional spikes I should expect in the meantime.
And I was going to suffer through all of it alone. No way in hell would I go to a heat clinic and let a bunch of random Alphas help me through it.
Just the thought of letting another Alpha touch me after what I shared with Hunter and Ryder made my skin crawl. They’d ruined me for anyone else. Just thinking about it sent another wave of tears threatening to spill over.
I hauled my aching body off the mattress, peeled away sweat-damp clothes, and stumbled toward the bathroom on unsteady legs.
I turned on the shower and stepped under the cold spray, not bothering to wait for it to heat up first. The water hit my skin hard enough to sting, steam swallowing the little room almost instantly, and I braced my hands against the tiled wall as everything I’ve been holding in cracked wide open.
The sobs came fast and ugly. The kind that made your chest ache and your throat go raw, the kind that didn’t care how pathetic you sounded because no one was there to hear it anyway.
The water drowned most of it out, which was the only blessing in the whole miserable setup.
I let myself fall apart under the spray.
Every stupid, overwhelming, humiliating feeling from the last day coming loose all at once.
I didn’t know how long I stayed there. Long enough for the water to cool. Long enough for my breathing to stop sounding like I’d just run a marathon through hell. Long enough that when I finally stepped out and looked at myself in the foggy mirror, I didn’t immediately burst into tears.
Honestly? Massive win.
I dried off, pulled on black leggings and one of Millie’s band tees, skipped underwear because there were limits to our friendship and borrowing panties was where I drew the line.
I twisted my hair into something that could generously be described as a bun, and took a breath before opening the door like I was about to face a firing squad.
I stepped into the living room and froze, my brain struggling to process what my eyes were seeing.
Flowers.
So many fucking flowers.
Every available surface in Millie’s tiny apartment was covered in bouquets—roses, lilies, sunflowers, things I couldn’t even name—all arranged in expensive-looking vases like someone decided subtlety was for losers. My nose didn’t know what to do with itself.
There were also shopping bags everywhere. Fancy ones. The kind that came from shops I couldn’t afford to breathe near.
“What the fuck is going on?” I asked because that felt like the only reasonable thing anyone could say in a room that looked like Cupid had a breakdown.
Millie didn’t move from where she stood at the counter. She just fixed me with a death glare. “Your boyfriends-” she hissed. “-have been sending shit all morning. Sixteen deliveries, Scotty. Sixteen! My fucking apartment will never not smell like a flower shop exploded in here.”
I blinked at her, trying to process that through the lingering fog in my brain. “This is all from Hunter and Ryder?”
“Who else?” she questioned, looking at me in disbelief. “It’s not like I have two hot Alphas trying to get in my pants. Of course it’s them, you idiot. They’ve been blowing up my phone all morning, and I had to threaten actual bodily harm to stop them from showing up here.”
Ella laughed, peeking out the window. “You might kill them anyway,” she said. “There’s another delivery van pulling up right now. Oh my God—wait, it’s from that fancy bakery that just opened. If there aren’t cupcakes in that box, I’m rioting.”
“There better be fucking cupcakes,” Millie muttered, already moving toward the door. “I’ve earned cupcakes.”
I didn’t move. I just stood there, staring at the flowers.
Leave it to Hunter and Ryder to respond to my running away by turning Millie’s apartment into a botanical garden.
“You need to talk to them,” Millie added over her shoulder. “Because if you don’t, they are absolutely going to show up here. Hunter’s texts are starting to sound a little unhinged.”
I closed my eyes for a second and pressed my fingers to my temples, because every instinct in me screamed at me to go to them.
To let them take care of everything. Wrap me up in coffee and cinnamon and low Alpha rumbles and make everything feel survivable.
My Omega leaned hard in that direction, needy, restless and practically whining at me to stop being an idiot and go where I belonged.
But that was the problem.
How was I supposed to do that, knowing that being with me could blow their whole lives apart?
Ella handed me a cup of coffee, her fingers brushing mine briefly. “You’re overthinking things, Scotty,” she said gently. “Drink that and relax.”
Millie came back in, balancing two bakery boxes, kicking the door shut behind her. She opened one immediately, revealing a perfectly arranged set of cupcakes in every color imaginable, and I felt my stomach twist in protest at the sweet smell.
I nearly cried.
It was already the worst day of my life. The least the universe could do was let me eat my feelings like a normal, devastated woman.
“I mean this in the nicest way possible,” Millie said, already halfway through a red velvet cupcake. “But you look like absolute shit.”
“Thanks,” I said flatly.
She swallowed, and her gaze softened slightly. “Everything is going to be okay, babe. I know it feels like a lot right now, but it will work itself out.”
“I don’t know how,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. “This is exactly what I was afraid of. This is why I tried to stay away from them.”
“Okay, first of all,” Millie said, pointing her cupcake at me like it was a weapon. “This is not on you. Your dad handled that entire situation like an asshole. This is a him problem.”
“The team isn’t just going to let him tank two of their best players because they’re fucking the Coach’s daughter,” Ella added. “That would be career suicide for him. The board would eat him alive.”
“I know,” I said, starting to pace because standing still felt impossible. “But he could bench them. Cut their ice time. Make things difficult. And what if they say they’re fine with it now and then regret it later?”
Millie sighed and reached out, catching my arm to stop me mid-pacing. “You’re not going to solve that by talking to us. You need to talk to them.”
“It’s not just about us,” I said, pulling away so I could keep moving. Pacing felt like the only thing keeping my thoughts from eating each other alive. “He’s still my dad. And Morgan—what if this comes between them?”
Millie snorted under her breath. “Pretty sure your dad already took care of that.”
I stopped. “What?”
“According to Hunter, Morgan is furious. She called Ryder last night to check in, and apparently, she and Coach had a massive fight. She told him she doesn’t want to see him until he stops being a dick.”
“I need to go see her,” I said, and for the first time all day, I felt like I had a purpose to focus on. “I don’t want this to ruin their relationship.”
“Scotty—”
“No,” I cut in. “I know I need to talk to the guys. I will. But I’m talking to Morgan first.”
Ella sighed, but she grabbed her keys anyway. “I have to pick Luka up, so I’ll drop you off.”
Millie pulled me into a hug. “I still think you’re being a fucking dumbass, but maybe talking to Morgan might help. Call if you need anything.”
I hugged her back before pulling away and following Ella out the door, my stomach twisting all over again as reality settled back in, because Morgan was probably not going to be thrilled to see me.
But she needed to hear it from me.
That I would sacrifice whatever I needed to keep everyone else whole.
Even if it left me in pieces.