Chapter 36 #2
She reaches out and takes the paper Gunner was holding, and he gives it up easily, looking at her like she’s both the sun and the moon and all the stars. Gabe steps behind her and puts a hand on her shoulder, and I see the trio the way they’ve stood since Taryn arrived. Strong. United.
And very, very opinionated.
“Duane Price,” Taryn reads. “Once a soldier serving under one Barrett Hawke. Saw action in both Afghanistan and Iraq, involved in multiple special ops raids. Never moved up in rank because his temper was deemed too erratic.” When she lifts her eyes, they’re triumphant.
“Dishonorably discharged because he became even more erratic after a mission with that same Barrett Hawke. People started saying he’d lost his mind.
That he was more intent on blaming Barrett for anything than taking responsibility for his own actions. ”
“No,” Duane snaps. “I was discharged because they didn’t like me. They never liked me.”
“Probably because they suspected you were sharing secrets with the enemy,” Taryn says quietly. “Doesn’t seem like a very smart thing to do, Duane. Especially when it brought your own company under attack.”
I both hear and feel the gasp from Bear, and moments later he’s moving for Duane, his hands reaching for his neck and his face caught in a fierce snarl.
Sammy throws herself at him, though, and I jump forward as well, grabbing for his arms. Gunner, Gabe, and Taryn just got here with answers and the aura of people who are here to save the day.
The last thing we need is for Bear to murder this guy and get himself in trouble again.
“Bear, stop!” Sammy cries. “No!”
“Bear,” I add, jerking at his arms. “It’s not the time!”
“Barrett!” Gunner snaps, his voice all lightning. “Don’t!”
But the man keeps moving like he doesn’t hear us, doesn’t feel us, in his absolute need to get to this man, and in a way, I can understand it.
Duane has gone out of his way to try to hurt Bear–to ruin his life–and none of us knows how long he might have been stalking the man he blamed for whatever happened in the Middle East. Even worse, he’s hurt Sammy and threatened Bear’s family.
He’s stepped over so many lines I don’t know how we’ll ever count them, and at the end of the day Bear was the one he was after.
But that doesn’t change the fact that Bear isn’t cleared yet, and murdering a man for past wrongs isn’t going to make him any friends on the council.
So I let go of him, positive that I’m not going to be able to do anything with strength, and use the one and only weapon that might actually work.
“Dad.”
The whole world freezes like it’s been frozen in the space of a moment, and I stand there, the only one still breathing, thinking, feeling.
I’m horrified at the word that just left my mouth.
And yet.
When he turns to me, Bear’s eyes are glassy with tears, deep and dark like the sky when night swallows the sun. His brows crease in confusion, his mouth open in shock, and I watch the emotion flit across his face. Shock. Disbelief. Confusion.
Relief.
I’m wrapped in his arms before I can move, his skin warm against me and his breath harsh in my ear. He’s stronger than I’ll ever be, his frame broader and older, and I couldn’t get away from the hug even if I wanted to.
I don’t.
I melt into it like it’s the thing I’ve been searching for my entire life, and the moment I have the thought I know it’s true.
I’ve spent every day since I was born wondering why I didn’t have a father like everyone else. Wondering why the man I was supposed to call dad didn’t love me–us–enough to stay, and what I’d done to drive him away.
What I could do to make him come back.
I covered it with everything I could think of. Hatred. Anger. Disinterest. The statement–which I almost came to believe–that I didn’t need a father anyhow, and that I was happier with just Sammy and her mom.
That even if he came home, I’d ignore him and try to drive him away again, because he’d spent my whole life ignoring me.
But now I know that he goes back for men he shouldn’t go back for. He saves dogs when Sammy asks him to and spends time getting to know how we like our bacon. When Sammy needs him he drops everything, and if I’m going to save her, he falls in step next to me.
So no, I can’t hate this man.
Not now that I actually know him.
I sink into the hug, my heart crushed in my chest and my stomach twisting with an emotion I can’t name, and I can feel the tears coming to my own eyes in response to his emotion.
Before they arrive, Sammy does, her small form worming its way in between us and wrapping one arm around each of us, her face turned into my chest. I feel her own tears, and that makes me feel better when I finally release the moisture in my eyes.
I turn my face into her hair and let the emotions come, all the feelings I’ve fought for years washing over me like paint across canvas, and Sammy is there soaking it all up while Bear holds us safe against his larger frame, the father we’ve both been searching for since we were born.
And in the distance, I hear Gunner saying something about Duane being under arrest for the kidnapping, at the very least, and Gabe murmuring something about doing Bear’s job for him.
But there’s laughter in Gabe’s voice and pride in Gunner’s, and I know that everything is going to be okay. Gunner has finally chosen his brother and Gabe got to play hero, though it was Taryn who came through for everyone with her magical Big City contacts.
And in the middle of it–or on the edges, I don’t know–Bear and Sammy and I are standing here holding each other, promising that we’ll always be here and that we’re the ones who matter, our arms around each other and our tears mixing in Sammy’s hair and on her face.
And for the first time I can remember, for the first time I ever, I feel peaceful and happy and whole.
I feel safe.
Because this is my family. They’re everything I’ve always wanted, and now they’re finally, finally in the same place.
They’re finally mine.