3. Josh
JOSH
Then
B usy dropping hay bales from the loft of the barn onto the ground, I heard the car pull up before I saw it. My shirt hung from the back of my pocket, and I grabbed for it, using it to wipe at my sweaty forehead before slipping it on over my head.
Was it already past noon? Dad had mentioned his girlfriend and her daughter would be arriving around that time.
I’d started my chores before the sun came up, hoping to be done in time for their arrival.
I’d meant to give myself time to shower and look presentable, but being secluded in the barn sometimes made keeping time hard.
I cursed as I heard the engine cut off, and stalked over to the ladder, not so much climbing down as sliding, loosely holding the sides with my gloved hands as I descended.
My booted feet hit the ground with a dull thud, kicking up dust and dirt.
Dad was going to be pissed at me for losing track of time.
I took a quick sniff under an armpit.
I didn’t smell too bad, and my hands were clean, at least. I’d taken my shirt off when I’d started sweating in the loft, so at least that wasn’t too dirty. I’d made sure my chores didn’t involve mucking this morning and put off any duties that involved grease until after their arrival.
Slipping the gloves off my hands, I hastily crammed them into the back pocket of my jeans as I made for the opening of the barn.
Oh well, nothing to be done for it now. Dad could snarl at me all he wanted, but at least they’d be getting an authentic Joshua Hex greeting.
If I didn’t have a smudge of dirt on my cheek or grease under my fingernails, something was wrong.
This day would be no different.
The day I met my stepsister.
I’d already met my dad’s girlfriend, Josie; my dad brought her around the farm several times in their span of dating.
She was nice, if not a little reserved, but that matched my father completely.
I was convinced there wasn’t a relaxed bone in his body, but when I saw Josie cause a smile to crack his otherwise stoic face, I knew she was a keeper.
Dad had already warned me that he planned to move them in.
First, they wanted Josie’s daughter, Dove, to meet us and see how it went before making any final decisions.
My dad wanted to propose, he told me. Not asked, told .
When he’d mentioned it over a silent dinner, the TV playing quietly in the background for noise, I’d been taken aback.
Not because I was opposed, but because my father hadn’t so much as looked at a woman since I was born, which also happened to be the day my mother passed.
I’d been surprised when he told me he was dating, but I never imagined he’d marry her.
I wondered what made Josie different, and then I thought back to the small smiles and the amused chuckles my dad let loose when she was around. He was free around her in a way I’d never seen, in a way he’d never been with me.
I knew a part of that was because he’d lost my mother, and looking at me was a painful reminder of that.
If this new woman could make him happier, who was I to deny that?
So, I’d nodded my approval and kept on chewing. That was about as talkative as the Hex men got around here.
Maybe that would change, though, with the addition of two women.
Shaded from the protection of the barn, my eyes protested as the sun blinded me the moment I stepped out. Squinting, I cupped my hand over my brow to shield me from the worst of the brightness as I glanced over to the front of the house.
A white car was parked there, my father already greeting Josie as he pulled the driver’s door open for her.
I could just make out the shape of a passenger in the back from this distance.
My stomach flipped nervously, my mind suddenly deciding to conjure up every irrational scenario that could potentially play out.
I stalked across the grass, trailing the gravelly dirt driveway as I made my way over to them.
What if Dove hated me? This wasn’t like regular siblings, bonded forever by blood. There would be no reason for her mother to want to stay here if her daughter disliked us. That outcome would surely gut my dad, and he’d blame me, like usual.
What if she was a whiny, sniveling brat?
It’d been my dad and I for so long, and we enjoyed our peace on the farm.
We’d built a routine between us that kept the farm maintained and functional, and we rarely strayed from it.
Would Josie and her daughter be able to stand the structured life it took to live here?
He’d mentioned they’d been city dwellers their whole lives, and that worried me.
This was the exact opposite of city living.
My feet scuffed in the dirt as I approached, making my presence known. My dad turned, his eyes narrowing as he took in my unkempt appearance. He scowled freely, his back turned to Josie, but I plastered on a smile as I peeked around him.
“Hi, Josie,” I greeted, glancing curiously to the back of the car, where her daughter still sat.
“Hi, Josh.” She smiled kindly at me, dimmed somewhat by nerves. Her own eyes flickered to the door that remained shut.
“She’s being a bit shy,” Josie warned us in a low voice, likely so Dove wouldn’t hear. “She’s been taking it all very well, but… this is new for her. I haven’t been with anyone since her father passed.”
The sorrow in Josie’s voice pulled an understanding noise from my dad. “She doesn’t have to come out until she’s ready,” he offered. “We can go inside and fix lunch while we wait.”
Josie gave a sad smile. “That’s kind of you, but she hasn’t been here before, and I’m afraid she’ll get upset if she doesn’t know where I am.”
“I’ll stay with her,” I volunteered. “When she’s ready, I can tell her we got lunch going if she’s hungry and bring her inside.”
Josie hesitated. “I don’t know…”
Gareth nudged her arm, slipping his hand down to grasp at her hand. The sight brought a happy pang to my chest. I’d never seen my dad act so tender.
“She’ll be fine,” he reassured her. “Josh will make sure she knows where you are.”
Josie sighed, glancing back to Dove in the car, who kept her head down, refusing to look in our direction. “All right. I don’t want to push her.” She turned her gaze to me, voice a little firmer. “But if she seems upset, please come get me.”
I nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”
My dad clasped my shoulder and gave it a grateful squeeze. My dad wasn’t a very affectionate man. I knew that gesture meant he was pleased with me, and I hated that I wanted to chase that feeling the second his hand left.
Josie thanked me before letting Gareth lead her away and up the porch steps, holding the screen door open for her so she could enter.
It banged shut behind them, and then it was just us; me standing in the middle of our driveway watching as Dove steadfastly ignored me from the safety of the backseat.
It felt a little creepy, just standing there waiting.
I didn’t want to open the door or initiate anything until she was ready.
I had the advantage of being in familiar territory, but the same couldn’t be said for her.
I didn’t want to invade the safe haven she’d created for herself in her mother’s car.
Instead, I tossed ideas around in my head, trying to think of ways to lure her out, something that would minimize her nerves.
A pitiful meow sounded behind me.
One of the barn kittens had wandered away from its mother. I’d recently introduced them to wet food, since their mother’s milk was drying up, and they followed me around like ducklings whenever they could.
A lightbulb went off in my head as I scooped up the tiny black kitten. “You just gave me a brilliant idea.” I placed a kiss to the top of its little head, and it mewled in demand.
“Yeah, yeah,” I murmured, peeking over my shoulder. Dove’s hair swished as she turned away abruptly, clearly not wanting to be caught staring. Hope bloomed inside me. I’d sparked her interest, at least for a moment. “I’ll feed you.”
The chorus of eight hungry kittens’ cries was shrill as I made my way back over to the front of the house.
I nearly tripped twice, catching myself from stomping on their tiny tails with my giant boots.
At thirteen, I was growing taller so quickly that I often tripped over my own unsteady, long legs.
I didn’t need to add tiny kittens in the mix.
“Watch out,” I laughed. Their beady eyes kept glancing up at me so much that they weren’t paying attention to where they walked. The smaller black one that had sought me out jumped onto my pant leg and attempted to climb, its sharp little claws pricking my skin.
“ Ow, ” I hissed, shifting the bundle in my arms so I could grab the kitten and place it on my shoulder.
“Now stay there. God, y’all act like I didn’t feed you just this morning.
You know this isn’t your normal feeding time, right?
” I informed them as they continued to excitedly waddle along.
“You better be thankful to Dove for this early meal you’re receiving. ”
I turned the corner of the garage, and the sun glinted off the white car. Dove was still inside, sitting in the same spot, her head down. I wondered what she was doing, if she was reading or listening to music, or just stewing in her worry. I prayed she wasn’t crying.
If she was, hopefully I’d change that in a moment.
I led them to the grass right in front of the porch, setting down the kitten on my shoulder before dumping my bundle.
Shallow, metal bowls clanged to the ground followed by a few cans and a spoon.
I arranged their food bowls with enough distance between each other so they wouldn’t be fighting for room to eat and cracked open the wet food tin.