Chapter 17 #2
I’d guess, for someone of his fame, privacy doesn’t come very easily.
Yet, I’ve only ever seen him be kind.
“My dad is from the South. Near Macon. I’m sure you can tell by their accents.” He nods toward his grandparents, currently flirting across the kitchen. “And my mom is actually from Florida. Near Cocoa Beach. They met when my dad played in the Major Leagues himself.”
“Your dad played, too? That’s so cool. He must be incredibly proud of you, Crew.”
He nods agreeingly. “More than you know. I’m an only child, so I don’t think it would have taken much for them to be proud, but I think it means a lot more to Dad than he’d ever let on that I went to play pro ball like him.”
“I guess that means you come from a pretty athletic family. Maybe Queen Addie of Emerald City will follow behind her daddy and grandpa.”
Crew chuckles, taking a sip of his hot chocolate. Whip cream coats his mustache, but I don’t tell him. Getting to see him a little less than perfect feels like a treat. “Queen Addie has dreams of being a hip-hop dancer. It’s like she wants me to get sentenced to life in prison for murder.”
“This is going to sound crazy weird…but that was always my dream as a kid. I wanted to shake my hips like Shakira but sing like Shania Twain.”
The most velvety laugh escapes him, hearty and full of so much life. I can’t ignore the butterflies in my stomach. “Two very different performers. No less queens. But vastly different.”
I laugh. “All I’m saying is…if you ever find yourself in need of someone to help her live that dream even a little bit…I’m your girl.”
“You seriously know how to hip-hop dance?”
“Hell no.” I wave him off. “Pretty sure I don’t have a coordinated bone in my body, but you better believe I’m up to try. Me and Addie can fulfill our dreams together…one horrible pop, lock, and drop it at a time.”
“Fucking hell.” Crew massages his temples, and I love the smile that creeps up his face. “I’m gonna say something, and it’s gonna be bold and likely inappropriate. Okay?”
Oh, god…
“Oh. Um. Okay.”
His hazel eyes that remind me so much of the mountain range meeting the green on the valley back home, stare at me with an intensity I’m afraid to match.
He ticks his lips in contemplation before throwing caution to the wind and speaking out.
“Sometimes, I wish you weren’t Addie’s doctor.
Actually, that’s a lie. Not sometimes—constantly. ”
Oh. My. Goodness.
And because I don’t know how else to respond, I whisper with bated breath, “Why?”
“Because I selfishly want you for myself.”
Right here and right now, it’s just Crew and me.
Every thought about being seen or recognized together fails to exist. It has to when he admits the first real thing he’s ever felt about me.
It was never just me who felt something different about him.
He’s felt it all along, and I’m not sure what we do with that.
“Crew…”
“I know…bad idea, right?” he huffs, his confidence diminishing, and an uncanny shyness takes over.
“It’s probably not the best idea,” I admit, and it feels sour on my tongue.
I’m his daughter’s doctor, and I’m elbow-deep in the dating scene while Crew works to figure out what’s next for him and Addie.
MLB season is underway, along with traveling and his restaurant. His injury. It’s just all too much.
Starting something that would never last would be irresponsible for both of us.
He focuses on the brown ceramic mug in his hands, eyes tracking the swirling of the hot chocolate. “Yeah. Sorry for mentioning it. I just had to get it off my chest, I guess. I think these few days off are getting to me.” He attempts to laugh, but something inside me tells me it’s more than that.
I hope he isn’t embarrassed. He shouldn’t be. I find his courage to voice what he feels very brave. Everything about Crew Briggs is admirable, I’m discovering.
Without overthinking it, I reach for his hand and entwine his fingers with mine. It’s intimate and grounding, but no less than stripping on a bar is. “Sometimes, I wish the same.”
Sad eyes are replaced with a look of hope. Hope for what? I’m not sure. “Someday…” he stammers calmly. “Someday…we’ll both wish for something different.”
“Maybe so. And that’s okay.”
He has yet to look away from our conjoined hands, and neither have I. “We’ve got jobs to do.”
I nod. “We do. You’ve got a life to live.”
Crew smirks. “I’m working on the living it part. Trying to enjoy the right now as much as I can. Doesn’t make it any easier when everyone around me is married, engaged, or having children. My life is backward.”
“Doesn’t make it any less right. Make your last season the best yet. Take care of that elbow.” I nod to the evidence, hinting that I noticed his discomfort earlier. “Advocate for your daughter in school. And run a damn good restaurant. Everything else will happen as it should.”
“You really believe that?” he asks.
“Wholeheartedly.”
Crew smiles, and just when I think he’ll get up and leave, he asks me, “Hey, you got any plans tonight?”
None at all, but I don’t say that. Don’t want to sound too desperate for company.
“I don’t think so, why?”
Letting go of my hand, he runs his thumb across his beard thoughtfully, the thickness of the dark hair sifting back and forth from the contact. “On Sunday nights, I usually check on Coach. Didn’t know if you wanted to join me? Addie’s with her mom, and I could use the company.”
That’s right. I remember the girls mentioning Crew being one of the only ones who does. He does routine wellness checks for Coach Leggins, and he’s inviting me to come with.
I do hesitate for a moment, unsure of why exactly I’m needed.
Maybe he simply needs my medical advice, or maybe it’s more.
“Sure. But can I ask if you’re inviting me because you think I can help him or because you just want me to be there?
Totally fine either way, but I’m not sure I’m qualified to fix heartbreak. ”
I have a list full of resources for Coach that I already emailed to Crew last week, but if he’s asking me to come to evaluate him for something else—no idea what that would be, since I’ve never met the guy—I’m not sure I’ll be much help.
“What?” he questions in dismay. “No. Juniper. That’s not what I meant. Fuck. I’m sorry. I should have clarified. I invited you because I like being around you. Maybe a little too much at times, but I want you to come as my friend.”
Oh.
“Oh. Well, yeah. Of course I’ll go as your friend, Crew. It’s the least I can do. Besides, I think it’s time I met the infamous Jack Leggins.”
“He’s not what he used to be, but you’ll see.”
I smile, pulling out a twenty from my pocket before Wynonna interrupts. “I know you are not about to insult me by dropping cash and dashing.”
“Figured you’d rather I do that than dine and dash, Mrs. Nonna,” I tease.
“Not when it comes to my people. You’re my people, fancy doctor. Get used to it. Should have stopped you from paying a long time ago, anyway. Besides, Crew already picked up everyone’s bills when he got here. So, either way”—she smiles proudly—“I’m paid.”
He did what? “You paid everyone’s tab?” I deadpan, unable to hide my shock.
He shrugs like it means nothing, but to me it means everything. “It’s nothing.”
Not caring Crew’s grandmother stands a few feet away, I repeat his words right back to him, “I’m gonna say something, and it’s gonna be bold and likely inappropriate. Okay?”
Honest to god, I’ve never seen a more contagious smile. “Okay. I can’t wait to hear it.”
“Only ever being your friend might be the worst thing to ever happen to me.”
His smile drops, and I know Crew is intelligent enough to know I’m not speaking poorly of him. I mean it because it’s true. Not exploring a relationship with Crew Briggs outside of the friend zone will go down as my biggest mistake.
An immense regret that I’ll have no choice but to accept.
With his head held high, his sunburst stare dances across my mouth, then my neck, all before lifting back up to my eyes. An unspoken bond cultivates between us.
“Good. Then we can suffer together.” He beats me to stand and takes off toward the exit. “Pick you up at six and bring your appetite. I wanna take you somewhere after.”
Then he’s out the door and back to his abandoned run, leaving me by myself again. Except this time, I’ve got Crew’s words of hope still lingering across my skin. Floating in the space he once filled.
Somehow, making it harder and harder to hold any interest for a man other than him.