Chapter 34 Marfil
It was still dark out when I opened my eyes. I didn’t immediately remember where I was, but then I found Sebastian dozing on the couch beside the bed, and the terrible scenes of the night before returned to me.
The first thing I did was check my cell phone.
Liam had written to say that Tami’s parents would arrive the next day and that he would stay with her until then.
He wanted to know what the hell had happened.
He told me the police wanted to interrogate all witnesses, and that Sebastian and I needed to present ourselves to make a statement.
I responded, saying I’d talk to Sebastian about it.
Sebastian, attentive to my every movement, opened his eyes as soon as I sat up.
“I didn’t mean to wake you,” I said, seeing that he was making his way over to me.
“I was awake,” he said, stretching out a hand to gently take hold of a loose strand of my hair and run his fingers through it. “I’m sorry about all of this, Elephant.” He sat down on the bed beside me.
I closed my eyes as I felt his lips brush my cheek. He kissed me tenderly and then sat back to look at me.
“Were you able to get some rest?”
I thought about the nightmares I’d had during the hours I’d been asleep, and I knew that I hadn’t rested much at all.
I felt even more exhausted than before, but I didn’t think it necessary to concern him, so I nodded.
I knew he was dreading the talk that was coming, but he had agreed to help me understand what the hell was going on.
Sebastian sighed, and for an instant, it seemed like he was reading my mind. Our eyes met, and something inside me stirred.
“When I look into your eyes, I feel like I’m looking into the eyes of an angel,” he said, slowly rubbing his thumb over my bottom lip. “If only you weren’t so beautiful, in every sense of the word.”
His comment seemed out of place, given the circumstances. I was about to respond, but his lips brushed gently against mine.
I sighed, and he took that as an opportunity to deepen the kiss, touching me in a way that made my heart race.
I hadn’t been expecting that, but I also wasn’t complaining.
He leaned me back onto the bed, his body on top of mine.
It was the first time we’d been alone in bed together, completely alone, with no cameras to register our movements through the apartment.
He had given me one of his shirts to sleep in, with nothing on underneath. The temptation must have been too much because he wasted no time running his hand up my leg until it rested on my knee. My breathing accelerated at his contact, his closeness, imagining all the possibilities.
“What I feel for you terrifies me, Marfil,” he confessed, his mouth hovering over mine before kissing me again.
I felt my heart flutter when he admitted he felt something for me, and gave in. I slid my hand up the back of his neck and buried my fingers in his hair, pulling him closer to me, arching my body to be in contact with his.
“I’m scared that I don’t know anything about you, at least not fully, and yet I feel the way I do…” I said in a trembling voice.
“You know much more than you should, believe me.”
He pressed my body into the mattress, giving me exactly what I wanted. Feeling his weight against me—his body so large and mine so small by comparison—made me want him in every sense of the word.
I slipped one of my hands inside his shirt and felt his torso, hard and chiseled like a marble statue. All his muscles were perfectly defined, and I wanted to run my lips, my tongue along every nook and cranny. I tugged on his shirt, and he helped me take it off him.
Were we really doing this? Right now?
I couldn’t shake this strange feeling that he wanted one last chance to have me before he told me the truth that would push me away forever. The thought terrified me, and I hugged him tight, not wanting to ever let go.
I was enthralled by his strength, his perfection, knowing that he had to try so hard to control himself with me, that he would kill for me. It turned me on to think about how strong he was, everything he knew how to do…
“Teach me, Sebastian,” I said, pulling back from his mouth and meeting his gaze. “Teach me how to pleasure you.”
The look he gave me said it all. He picked me up and flipped me around so that I was now straddling him. “Kiss me,” he demanded.
I leaned down and kissed his lips. Then I left a trail of wet kisses along his neck, over his sculpted pecs, and on each one of his well-defined abs until I reached his obliques.
He looked so serious seeing me on top of him, inching closer to that part of him I was dying to taste…
My fear vanished. I forgot about all my problems, what might happen to me, the terrible truth he promised to reveal.
All I wanted was to pleasure this man whom I loved.
For the first time, I wasn’t being selfish.
For the first time, I was thinking about him instead of myself and what I felt when he kissed and touched me.
I unbuttoned his jeans, and he helped me take them off him. His erection strained against the fabric of his boxers, demanding my attention. He looked at me, encouraging me to go on, as if giving me permission.
Seeing that I was unsure of what to do next, he took my hand in his and placed it on his dick. He was hard, and I gripped him tightly on pure instinct.
“Slowly, beautiful,” he said, exhaling through his nose and squeezing his eyes shut. “Like this,” he said, showing me how to touch him.
I was shocked by the feel of him in my hands. I had only touched Regan and Liam, and that had been two years ago… Touching Sebastian, seeing his reaction, how his breath hitched.
I didn’t hesitate.
I took him in my mouth, and I heard him curse under his breath, shaking beneath me.
That turned me on. I caressed the tip of his dick, slowly running circles with my tongue.
Sebastian slid his hand to the back of my head, gripped my hair, then began guiding my movements and setting the pace, though I was in no hurry.
I wanted to enjoy that experience as long as possible.
Sebastian, however, seemed to think differently.
He flipped me around again and climbed on top of me.
I didn’t know whether to be upset or in awe of his command.
Not that I had too much time to dwell on it.
With one swift motion, he lifted my shirt and started kissing me everywhere, stopping on my breasts and sucking on my nipples as his hand slipped inside my underwear and applied pressure to the most sensitive part of my body.
“You are exquisite,” he said, trailing his tongue from my neck all the way into my belly button. All the while, his huge pupils looked like they wanted to devour me.
I squirmed excitedly under his weight as he lowered himself little by little, until his mouth was between my legs.
“God…” I said, closing my eyes as he ran his tongue over my clit. I was going to explode. I was going to explode into a thousand pieces.
I writhed with intense pleasure, unable to remain still, until he lifted my legs and placed them on his shoulders. I was too excited, and he was all too willing to give me what I wanted.
“Don’t move,” he said, pulling away from me for an instant.
“Sebastian…” I said in a weak whisper as he tasted me again.
This time, however, it was as if he’d been hungry for more. He buried his tongue in my pussy, then sucked on my clit as he inserted a finger inside me. Slowly at first, then picked up speed. His tongue devoured me as his fingers fucked me.
“Fuck… Sebastian… I’m so close.”
The way his mouth touched me, the way his tongue knew exactly what to do to drive me crazy… the pleasure was too much to handle. The orgasm came on quickly, as I shouted his name loudly.
Sebastian pulled back and looked at me, very serious.
It took me a few seconds to recover, but my body wanted more, needed more.
“What are you waiting for?” I asked, longing for him to take me, to make me his once and for all. I wanted him inside me.
Unfortunately for me, he ran a hand over his face in a gesture I knew all too well.
“You’re a virgin, fuck,” he said, very serious.
“And?” I argued, sitting up and tugging him by the neck.
He kissed me fiercely, and I felt his hard dick against my groin.
I quivered.
“It’s better we wait,” he said, and I could tell by his expression that it tortured him.
“Are you crazy?” I said, arching myself against him.
“Stop,” he said, pressing my body to the mattress with a hand against my stomach.
“Fuck me, Sebastian,” I ordered him, taking his hard cock between my hands.
“Don’t talk like that,” he said, biting my lower lip, more as a distraction than anything else.
What the hell was wrong with him?
“You don’t want me to talk like that because I’m a little princess who always gets what she wants?”
Sebastian took my wrists in one hand and pulled my arms over my head, pinning me to the mattress.
“Yes, you are a little princess, my little fucking princess, to be precise. And even though I’m dying to fuck you, I can’t do it right now. Not without you knowing everything that I am, everything that I do…”
The term “little fucking princess” wasn’t the most romantic thing I’d ever heard, and it wasn’t how I saw myself. I was no princess, and I hated to be called that, but hearing him say I was his drove me wild.
“I know who you are, Sebastian,” I said, looking into his brown eyes. “You’re the man I love. That’s who you are.”
Sebastian closed his eyes, and instead of reciprocating the I love you, he simply pulled away from me and flopped down beside me on the bed.
“You don’t know what you’re saying…” he said, his eyes fixed on the ceiling.
My declaration of love seemed to have hit him like a bucket of ice-cold water. He stood up and put his jeans back on.
“I know what I’m saying because I’m the one who feels it,” I said, pulling at the sheet to cover myself, suddenly feeling very exposed.
“You have no fucking idea, Marfil,” he said, shooting me a venomous glance. “You’re in love with someone who doesn’t exist.”
“You’re a hologram and you didn’t tell me?” I asked sarcastically.
He looked at me condescendingly and walked away from the bed to place both hands on the kitchen table. “I’ve done things that would horrify you,” he said after a long silence, looking at me very seriously.
“You were in the military; it’s normal you’d think that. The things you must’ve had to face…” I started, but he let out a laugh.
“My time in the military is the least of it.”
He was starting to scare me. I knew that Sebastian had a difficult childhood and a dark past. Everything indicated he had struggled to get to where he was now, but that didn’t mean he was a bad person.
“Stop demonizing yourself.”
Sebastian was about to say something when his phone began to ring.
I took the interruption to slip his T-shirt and my underwear back on. Why had such an intimate moment between us turned into a stupid debate about whether Sebastian was a good or bad person? It was ridiculous.
I could hear him arguing with someone, and as soon as he hung up the phone, he punched the kitchen window, which cracked, causing my heart to jump into my throat.
I stood up from the bed and moved away from him until my back was against the wall.
Sebastian turned toward me, his hand bloodied, the mask of hatred on his face slowly giving way to regret. He walked slowly over to me. “I’m sorry,” he said, holding out his hand.
I allowed him to caress my cheek, maintaining eye contact. “Tell me the fucking truth once and for all, Sebastian.”
He hesitated but finally nodded. “You’re not going to like what I have to say, but considering the way things are going, you’ll find out soon enough anyway. You’re too smart not to.”
I didn’t say anything, waiting for him to continue.
“Your father is a drug lord, Marfil.” He said it without hesitation, like someone ripping off a Band-Aid. Better to get it over with quickly so it hurts less, or so they say. But my world stopped, and the words that had just fallen from his lips echoed in my brain. I was unable to process them.
“That’s a lie,” I said, crossing the room to the opposite wall.
“No, it’s not,” he said, looking at me sadly.
I hated that look with all my being.
“How do you know?”
He pressed his lips together and let out all the air he was holding in. “Because I am, too.”