Chapter 25 #2
“Not like that.” Her dismissal comes easily.
“I was scared you would be mad that I read the messages, but I didn’t think you would hurt me or anything.
I think I was more afraid to find out why you answered like that, and why that was still on the table when…
” She doesn’t finish, but I don’t need her to. I know what she means.
“I wish you would have talked to me. I could tell something was off last night, but I just thought, hell, I don’t know what I thought beyond the fact that the last few days have been a mess, so I wouldn’t blame you for shutting down a little bit.”
“Maybe I should have,” she agrees, and we lapse into silence again. This thing between us still isn’t fixed, and I want it to be. I hate that I added to the shit she’s already dealing with, but she was so quick to cut and run, and that needs to be addressed too.
I ask her what’s really on my mind. “Were you afraid because you didn’t have anywhere else to go? Is that why you really stayed if it bothered you so much?”
“No,” she scoffs. “I stayed because I wanted it to be a misunderstanding, because I didn’t want to believe what I was reading, and that made me feel like crap, because if I was willing to put up with that already, then what’s going to happen when I really—” She rolls her lips in as if refusing to finish what she was about to say.
“When you really what?”
She shakes her head, refusing to entertain my question. “Then why were you so quick to want to get the hell away from me today?”
Harlyn’s eyes narrow into near slits, but it’s her dull tone that bothers me more when she answers, “I’d beg for my sister, because she can’t fight for herself anymore, but I will not allow myself to accept less from somebody than I am willing to give.
Whether you believe it or not, the way you answered her was wrong.
I see it as wrong, anyway, and the way you acted when you found out was…
what it was. You didn’t want to hear what I had to say, didn’t want to believe me, and I get it.
You don’t even know me. All this” —she waves her hand, pointing back and forth between us— “is rushed and messy, but my feelings are involved, and I can’t help that, so tell me, Boone, what should I have done?
Because I’m already in way too deep, and clearly you aren’t.
” Her limp hands fall into her lap in what seems like defeat.
“You’re wrong.” I scoot off the bed and make it to the chair she strategically positioned herself in in three strides.
Her head tilts back as her eyes widen a fraction.
I grasp both arms of the chair in lieu of gripping her, because I feel like I need to be grounded when I say this.
“I am in deep, so deep it scares me more than I want to admit, which is why I need to know you aren’t going to cut and run the moment we don’t agree on something.
I get you didn’t go looking for something on my phone.
Hell, I can even admit I would probably have done the same thing, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have to address it from both sides. ”
“I tried that, and you acted like you couldn’t see why the message bothered me.
That’s what I have a problem with. I mean, I didn’t like knowing it appeared like you were keeping your options open, but the worst part was knowing you don’t see it as wrong, and I do.
I won’t change my mind on that.” She shakes her head in denial as if to demonstrate it further.
I try to lower myself, but it ends up being easier to kneel in front of her.
“I didn’t see the problem with my response.
” I hold up one finger to stop her retort when she opens her mouth.
“Because it never entered my mind that I would see her again… in that way. It really was just a way to let her know I was no longer available.”
“See how easy that was?” Harlyn says. “You could have said exactly that, I’m no longer available, just as easily.”
“I see what you’re saying. I even get why you would think the answer was shitty, but I also think if you explained what happened last night about you accidentally seeing the message, we could have handled this differently.”
“You could have also explained that you responded to a hookup text earlier,” she counters.
I open my mouth to argue there wasn’t a point, but then I think better of it and say, “I get what you’re saying,” instead.
Harlyn sinks farther into the chair and averts her eyes. “Sorry for looking through the old messages and for… my part in this.”
I reach up and run my finger along her jaw, gently urging her to return her attention to me. “I’m sorry too.”
Her eyes narrow infinitesimally, making me question if there’s more I should say, or if she would let me kiss her, because that’s what I really want to do.
When she demanded to get out of the car, that’s when I became really worried.
Some part of me grasped just how badly I don’t want Harlyn Wade walking out of my life.
Her features soften as my gaze bounces from her eyes, across her cheeks and the little freckles there, then down to her lips.
I watch as she tugs in the corner of her mouth, denting her lip, and I lose what little restraint I have when it comes to her.
I lean in ever so slowly so she can tell me to get lost if she wants to and breathe her in.
I delay the moment our lips brush, but the position is no less intimate.
Harlyn nuzzles her nose against me sweetly, as if she’s just as eager for me to touch her.
I grab the back of her neck and pull her mouth to mine.
The next several minutes are a frenzy of me tugging at her clothes while her nimble fingers remove mine.
Her mouth pops open when I push her back against the wall and hook her knee high on my hip.
She’s too short for me to get inside her like this, but fuck, I love the way she feels pressed against me, all soft yet unyielding.
I slide my hand up the back of her leg and slip my fingers into her pussy.
The proof that she wants me just as badly makes it easy to shove two fingers deep inside her heat.
Her breath catches, and I drop my forehead to the wall, forcing myself to slow down before I do something stupid like hurt her by accident.
When she sags in my arms, I take it as a sign to slip my fingers in and out of her while my thumb presses down on her clit.
“You’re going to make me come,” she warns, and I know it to be true by the way she’s milking my fingers.
I press against her harder, shoving my fingers as deep as I can while circling my thumb.
Her hand comes up to cover her mouth before she lets out a muffled whimper while her head jerks back. I move her hand away from her face with my chin and seal my lips to hers, stealing all those sweet sounds of pleasure.
When Harlyn’s kisses slow as she tries to catch her breath, I slip my fingers out of her, then I use the same hand on her shoulder to direct her to her knees.
She looks up at me through dark lashes and opens her mouth, giving herself over to me completely.
It’s an inherently submissive move, and it makes my cock jerk.
I fist my base, squeezing to the point of near pain, hoping in vain it will somehow make this last longer because I will never get enough of her.
Her eyes close when I feed her my dick, inch by slow inch, as if she’s savoring it just as much as I am. Careful not to push her or myself too far, I keep my fingers locked around my shaft. Her throat spams once or twice, and fuck if it doesn’t nearly put me over the edge.
I stroke the side of her face, and her bright blue eyes flash open to gaze up at me.
She sucks harder, deeper, and I pull my hips back as the heavy feeling at the base of my spine intensifies.
Just as my tip slips out of her mouth, I come, painting her neck and chest. Harlyn looks down, panting, then lifts a hand with short, dark nails and rubs my seed all over her tits.
It’s erotic as hell. Thoughts of her filled with my cum, her belly round with my baby, fill my head.
Bracing my hand against the wall, I kneel in front of her. If I weren’t terrified by my own thoughts, I would beg her to let me do it now.
“Don’t come down here.” She waves her hands around, reminding me where we are.
“I go where you go.” I cradle her jaw in my hands and kiss her. It’s slow, but no less demanding. I need every piece of Harlyn Wade, and she seems more than willing to give it.