22. Jerrid #2
The shadow tore at him, fighting back. Jerrid clung to the girl because he knew he couldn’t give up. He had to stay on his feet and give Ava time to break the tether. But the energy bled from his body as if it were being drawn out of him.
His thoughts grew muddled and distant, and music filled his ears, a haunting and terrible melody that felt as old as time itself.
His world became nothing more than pain, music, and blue fire.
This must be what the final crossing was like, when a soul passed from the mortal world into Valhalla and what lay beyond. The pain couldn’t last forever, and this journey would be brief. If he could just hold on long enough for Ava to save the others.
To save herself.
If she could survive, then none of this would matter. He didn’t care what happened to him.
But his body shook uncontrollably, betraying him. The music grew louder, and the heat intensified. The thundering in his head became so heavy that he knew his skull would explode at any moment. The splintering pain brought him to his knees.
Someone crashed into him from behind, a hand pressing briefly against his shoulder. Jerrid struggled to stand, but he could no longer tell up from down. The world spun around him, a world made up of pain and music, of blue light and shadow…
The music intensified as he began to slip away. Eternity was calling his name. He could hear it on the tides of change, his name being whispered—no, sung—to the tune of that deep and terrible melody.
Reverberations shuddered through his body as he tumbled backward. Something hard dug into the small of his back, a hand pressing down on his arm. He blinked wildly to clear his vision as the music faded.
The heat cooled, as well, and the pounding in his head snapped off as if the giant drum had been ripped out of the enemy’s hand.
Voices erupted around him, high-pitched and frightened.
“Go! Everyone, go!” Finnr was yelling, close to Jerrid’s ear. “Come on, laddie, up on your feet.”
Hands caught him under the arms, and his stomach whirled unpleasantly as he was forced onto his feet before he was ready. The hands released him, and he pitched sideways into the wall of the gulley.
“Shades! What’s wrong with the lad? He’s as pale as a ghost.”
Warm hands curled around his forearms as he was dragged to his feet once again. Warm bodies pressed up against him, his arms held high to either side. They’d been stumbling forward for several minutes before his brain figured out what was happening.
He was being held aloft by two people, one under each of his arms. They held tightly to his wrists and practically carried him forward, his feet dragging uselessly against the dry leaves on the ground.
He forced his foot to move in an attempt to keep pace with them.
“That’s it, laddie,” Finnr grunted. “Move those legs now. Quick march before that thing comes back!”
“What—” Jerrid mumbled, but someone hushed him.
“Just move.” Ava rasped, pressed up tight against his side. “Don’t talk, just run.”
They stumbled onward, following the curve of the gully until it opened up onto the path that led back to camp.
What’s wrong with you? Dragon’s voice was a welcome intrusion.
Jerrid cracked his eyes open, almost expecting to see his scaly face in front of him. But only the dark trunks of trees and the occasional prick of light from the camp bonfire hung before him.
Something is wrong. I can feel it. You’re…you’re not yourself.
“No kidding,” he rasped back.
Clearly, this three-way bond Dragon and Ava had concocted was backfiring, and he was the one paying the price for their foolish experiment. Shifting wasn’t meant to be shared or transferred, that was for certain. If it were, people would have tried it long ago. It wasn’t like it had been that hard.
They’d done it accidentally.
Mostly, Dragon whispered. I might have helped things along a little bit…
“Thanks…for that…” Jerrid managed around labored breaths.
“Not now,” Finnr grunted, tightening his hold on Jerrid’s wrist as he heaved him a little higher onto his shoulders. “You’re blooming heavy. Just move those legs of yours, laddie.”
Jerrid didn’t have the energy to tell him that he’d been talking to himself.
They already think you’re crazy. You and Ava both. That’s probably my fault, too.
If he had the energy, Jerrid would have rolled his eyes, but all he could manage was to feel peeved. Hopefully, Dragon got the message. And he must have, because he went silent, withdrawing to a safe distance so that Jerrid could focus on moving his feet, one after the other.
It took an eternity to get back to the camp. The entire time, the back of Jerrid’s neck itched, as if the shadow were chasing behind them, about to strike at any minute.
But it never did.
Whatever Ava had done to it must have bought them some time. But how much time? Were they running now just to be forced to fight that thing again in fifteen minutes?
As they stumbled between the tents, Jerrid had to wonder what the point was. They couldn’t fight this thing, not by themselves. Ava didn’t have enough fire to defeat the shadow. Jerrid knew better than any of them how vast and ancient it was.
He’d gotten a taste of the thing, and it was worse than any of them had imagined. Whatever this thing was, wherever it had come from, it was beyond their ability to fight. Even with all of them together, it wouldn’t be enough.
Finnr and Ava dropped him down on a crooked stump. He braced his palms against his thighs, gasping for breath.
Ava crouched in front of him and peered up into his face, her eyes huge, frightened. “Flames, Jerrid, you look like…like—”
“Death warmed over,” Finnr supplied helpfully, but when Jerrid shot him an annoyed look, the man backed away with a grim smile.
“If I look as good as I feel,” Jerrid managed, “I must be quite the sight.”
Ava didn’t smile; her mouth pressed into a thin, white line. Shades, he must look worse than he realized. She peered over her shoulder and then shifted so that she crouched closer to him. She laid a hand on one of his.
“There’s something I need to tell you,” she whispered.
Why was she being so furtive, as if she didn’t want anyone else to overhear what she was about to say?
“I think I know what’s wrong with you.” She hesitated, tongue flicking over her lower lip. “Did you hear music recently? While we were, uh, fighting?”
Jerrid’s pulse quickened. “How did you know that? When we were in the gully…I did hear music. I thought I was just, I don’t know, dying or something.”
“You weren’t dying,” she said, but something in her tone sounded cagey, too cautious. “I think I was sort of, um, killing you.”
Killing him? What in the world was she talking about?
“Do you mean the connection between you, me, and Dragon?”
No, Dragon hissed, she isn’t talking about that.
“What do you two know that I don’t?” Jerrid demanded, his pulse thrumming in his aching temples. “What do you mean, you’re killing me?”
Ava squeezed the bridge of her nose with her free hand, her other one still resting on top of his as if she were trying to restrain him or keep him calm.
“It’s difficult to explain. It’s an old family curse, and I didn’t think I had it.
It’s never done anything before, so I thought maybe I’d been lucky. ”
He inhaled a slow breath, his chest tight. “And what does this family curse of yours do?”
Ava’s cheeks darkened, and she stared at him through wide, unblinking eyes. “It takes energy from others so that I can funnel it to someone else. I’m not supposed to be able to use it myself…but I think I’ve been giving it to Dragon, who kind of…feeds it back to me.”
He blinked, replaying the battle with the shadow. When Ava had attacked the shadow with her magic using her power, that was the precise moment when he felt like he was dying. When he collapsed.
So, if she was right…she’d taken energy from him to break the tether holding on to the girl.
“It wasn’t the shadow that almost killed me,” he whispered. “It was you.”
She flinched but didn’t draw back. “I’m afraid so. I didn’t mean to do it. I didn’t even know that I was doing it until I heard the music. And then…well, when I turned around, and you were on the ground…”
It struck with the force of a blow how useless he was. Ava and Dragon didn’t need him, except as a food source to keep themselves fueled and strong. He was just…fuel. Energy. A tool. No wonder Dragon had abandoned him in exchange for Ava.
I didn’t abandon you, you numbskull. You tried to lock me in a box. I escaped to save myself.
“No, you escaped because she’s stronger than me,” Jerrid rasped, slipping his hand from beneath Ava’s.
He couldn’t stand to feel her touch, knowing that she didn’t care about him, that she was just using him the same way Dragon had used him.
The shadow had been right all along.
About everything.