Chapter 19 #3
“Then the bridal party will move out of the guest wing. Do you want to do clean up after—”
“We’re barely going to be conscious after the disaster—I mean, the wedding is over. I’ve got Francine and her crew coming in to do the guest wing and the cottage on Monday. You should take Sunday and Monday off, Shay. You’ve been so helpful through this whole thing. I can’t thank you enough.”
“Are you kidding? Francis, this is the dream job. I love working with you. This wedding has been a mess, but that doesn’t mean they all will be. You have two more planned this year, right?”
I groaned. “Don’t remind me.”
“Oh, come on. They can’t all be like Karen.”
We both snorted.
“I keep wondering, is she a Karen because her parents named her Karen, or is it just a coincidence?”
“We’ll never know.”
I sent Shay home and was just grabbing a glass of water when my phone buzzed. Assuming it was Kendall, I answered it.
“Francis, please don’t hang up.”
My back stiffened, and I set the glass down crooked, spilling water everywhere.
“Dad?” I hated how shaky my voice sounded.
“You have been ignoring my messages, but I need to speak with you. It’s very important.”
I’d read the transcripts of the first few, and then I started deleting them. It was awful of me, I know, but I didn’t want to deal with him. Not now. “Dad, I’ve got a really big event I’m in the middle of. Can we do this next week?”
“What I need to tell you cannot wait. Francis—”
“Sir, I know this is disrespectful, but I can’t have this conversation right now. Goodbye.”
I hung up the phone, dropped it, and sank to the floor.
“Francis? Are you down here?”
“In here.”
Mom came around the corner of the kitchen counter and saw me on the floor.
“What’s wrong?”
“I thought it was Kendall, and I answered the phone. It was Dad.”
She slid down next to me. “He’s tried to call me, too.”
She took my hand in hers, and we sat there very much like we had the day she’d helped me move into this place.
“I just couldn’t talk to him tonight, not when I need to keep it together to get through this wedding.”
She huffed. “Yeah, this girl could try the patience of a saint. And her grandmother. Hmm. Some of the ladies in town warned me about her when Judy and I were eating at the diner. They felt sorry for you hosting this wedding.”
“I think I’m not cut out for weddings. Not just because of this one, but…” I didn’t want to bring it up again with Mom.
“But what, Francis?”
I sighed. “I still feel guilty about you and Dad. And last night… Kendall and I talked about it, but I couldn’t bring myself to ask him if he ever wanted to get married again. I can’t take the disappointment if he says no.”
“You can take the truth. It might hurt, but you’ve been through worse. Is marriage what you want?”
I nodded, my eyes filling with tears. “This damn wedding has me a mess. I was doing just fine.”
“Sure. Just fine.”
“Mom, I’m serious. He asked me last night what I thought about marriage.
Yeah, we’re talking about stuff like that.
I told him how you and Dad were close for so long, and about Auntie Judy and Uncle Gordon.
I had great examples of partnerships, and I want that.
” I sighed heavily. “I guess it doesn’t matter if we get married or not, but that’s what I want.
And I hate that you don’t have a partner anymore. ”
She sighed and pulled at a string on the hem of her yoga pants.
“Francis, your dad and I… He’s a good man, and he loves me, loves us in his own way, but at some point, his work and his worry about appearances started to really get to me.
I don’t even know if he realized it. I pointed it out to him many times, but it became easier just to live parallel lives.
And then when he put you out… that was too far. I still can’t believe him.”
“Why do you think he’s reaching out now?”
“I don’t know,” she said, giving me a sad smile.
“But you can’t be morose about things you can’t fix.
You have the whole town practically coming out for this wedding.
You are going to be an ambassador for love and marriage in your sleek-looking tuxedo—that I picked out for you, of course—and everything will go according to plan.
Go get some sleep, so you don’t look tired tomorrow. ”
At any other time, I might have given her attitude about suggesting I looked anything but fabulous, but she was trying to lift me up. That’s what she’d always done, no matter what it cost her.
“I love you, Mom.”
“I know. Go to bed.”
I trudged up the stairs, everything aching including my eyeballs, did my nightly routine so she wouldn’t complain about me looking tired, and then I crawled into bed. I had one of Kendall’s t-shirts I’d stolen at one point, and I took a big whiff of it before tucking it under my pillow.
All I had to do was get through tomorrow. Then I would deal with my father. And then, maybe, I’d get up the courage to talk about future expectations with Kendall. For now, I knew he loved me, and that was all that mattered.