Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
ROCHELLE
My eyes fill with unshed tears as I climb the stairs to our bedroom. I slam the door behind me, and the smell of Drifter hits me instantly. My chest tightens.
How could I have been so fucking stupid to think he wouldn’t stray? He’s no better than my father was.
My hands drift to my stomach. This baby growing inside me, something we created together, now feels tainted. Today is supposed to be the happiest day of my life. Instead, I’m about to become a single mum.
How did it get so complicated?
“Your father doesn’t even know you exist,” I whisper, pressing my palm flat against my stomach, “and he’s no longer worthy of either of us.”
My back slides down the door until I collapse in a heap on the floor. A lump swells in my throat, stealing the air from my lungs. My heart pounds so hard, it hurts. I drag my knees to my chest, curling around my stomach, holding myself, holding my unborn child.
A scream tears from me, piercing and broken, ricocheting off the walls.
I’ve lost everything.
My heart feels like it’s splintering into a thousand pieces. The life I once knew, the life I’d cherished, is gone. For what? A skanky club girl.
My hands fist in my hair, tugging at the roots as the full weight of it crashes over me. I was never enough for him. He chose another woman over me.
We’ve been together since I was a teenager. We were always meant to be forever.
And now . . . I’m alone.
The very foundations of my life crumbles beneath me. Memories of my parents flood back, Mum always turned a blind eye when he strayed, even when I questioned her.
“It’s just part of the club life,” she used to say.
Not for me. Not for my child. I won’t raise a baby thinking this is normal. If you love someone, you don’t shatter their world.
Tears stream down my cheeks as my body shakes with sobs.
He doesn’t love me. If he did, he wouldn’t have done this to me . . . to us.
I push myself off the floor and stumble towards the mirror. My reflection is wrecked. Mascara trails down my cheeks like war paint, and my hair, perfectly styled to tell him our news, now sticks to my damp skin, matted and wild, a true reflection of how I feel inside.
One moment. That’s all it took. One moment, and everything is destroyed.
I swipe beneath my eyes, trying to erase the panda smudges, and take a steadying breath.
This may be the only life I’ve ever known, but I won’t let it be the only one I accept.
I straighten my shoulders and smooth down my dress.
“You’ve got this, Rochelle,” I whisper to my reflection.
I don’t know where I’ll go, but I’ll be damned if I stay here another second. Not in this room. Not in that bed. Not in the place where our child was conceived out of what I thought was love.
I turn to stare at the makeup still scattered across the bed and I realise I’ve never been more clear on anything in my life.
I scoop the makeup back into the bag, then I pull out a duffle bag from under the bed and go to the wardrobe.
I smile to myself, remembering the excitement just an hour ago as I got changed with the girls.
I shake my head to clear it then begin tugging clothes from their hangers and shoving them into the bag.
Once I have everything I need, I turn slowly, looking around the room that I’ve shared with Drifter for so long.
A tear rolls down my cheek, and I swipe it away.
The memories play out like a movie, all our happier times right here, just the two of us, and the way we’d somehow always end up tangled in the bedsheets with his hand placed over my heart.
“You’ll always be mine, Hell. Now and forever. You were meant for me.”
The memory fades away as I stand in the doorway. It’s a shame you didn’t think about that an hour ago, Drifter.
I hang my head, my eyes cloudy from tears.
Just go, Rochelle. Just leave.
I force myself to turn and walk away.
DRIFTER
“What the fuck are you all looking at?” I grit out as I shove through the crowd gathered outside.
The ol’ ladies stare at me like I’m something they scraped off their shoes. Red stands with her hands planted on her hips, her mouth parting like she’s about to tear into me.
“Don’t even fucking bother,” I growl, pushing through the clubhouse doors. I need to get to her. I need to explain.
A hand clamps around my arm.
I glance down at Clay’s grip on my kutte, then I slowly look back up at him. “What the fuck?” I spit. Since when does anyone here question my authority? “Get the fuck off me.”
I wrench my arm free, but he shoves me back against the wall, his forearm braced across my chest, blocking my path like a damn barrier.
“Not a fucking chance,” Clay growls. “You need to calm the fuck down before you go up there.”
“She’s my fucking wife,” I roar, straining against him.
“Maybe you should’ve thought about that before you did what you did,” he snaps, nostrils flaring.
“Clay, seriously . . . move.”
“Pres,” he says, his jaw ticking as he reins himself in, “you fucked up.”
I see it in his eyes. Disappointment. Anger.
Clay hates cheating. Always has. He destroyed his own brother by sleeping with his woman, so he knows exactly what this kind of betrayal does.
Seeing the hollow, lifeless look in Hell’s eyes when she found us sobered me up instantly. And when I saw Siren standing there too, I knew I’d destroyed everything.
I’d broken my word. The promise I had made to her weeks ago plays over and over in my head.
“I promise I won’t be going anywhere near her. Why would I need to when I’ve got the most perfect woman lying in my arms?”
I fucked up. Monumentally.
I shove Clay away and slam my fist into the drywall, which crumbles beneath the force. He stands in front of me, arms folded across his kutte, watching me like I’m about to detonate.
I pace the small foyer like a caged animal. “Fuck!” I roar, dragging my hands through my hair. I look at him. “What the fuck have I done?”
“You fucked up,” he replies flatly. “Big time.”
The door swings open as people file back inside. I step aside, letting them pass, then rest my head against the wall once we’re alone. “What the fuck do I do?” I ask.
“You leave her. Let her cool off. You can’t storm in there like a bull in a China shop. You’ll only make it worse.”
I start pacing again. “Not a chance. I have to fix this.”
“What are you gonna do? Walk in there and demand she forgive you?”
I shake my head. “She needs to know that I know I fucked up. That I’ll do anything.”
Clay arches a brow. “Did you not just see what she did to your bike? You really think she’s ready to listen?”
“I don’t give a shit about my bike,” I snap. “She’s my everything.”
The look he gives me only winds me up further. He might be my VP, but right now, I don’t give a fuck. I need to get to her.
I shove past him and take the stairs two at a time, urgency clawing at my chest. I reach the bedroom door and press my palm against the cool wood.
“Please, Hell,” I mutter. “Just hear me out.”
I push the door open to find the room empty. But it’s in chaos, with clothes strewn everywhere. This isn’t like her. Hell’s obsessive about order.
I lower myself onto the bed. The mattress dips under my weight, and something tumbles to the floor. I bend to pick it up, turning it over in my hands.
A pregnancy test. I stare at it.
Positive.
My stomach drops so fast it feels like I’ve been punched. What the fuck have I done? My eyes dart to the dresser. The drawers are half-open, so I rush over and yank one wide.
Her clothes are gone.
Where the fuck would she go?
Her whole life is here.
Running out of the room, I rush back down to the lounge, the pregnancy test gripped tightly in my hand.
Everyone is going about their business until I enter, then the room falls deathly silent.
I hear hushed whispers as they watch me storm across the room.
I haven’t got time for this shit. I need to find Hell.
I throw the pregnancy test onto the table in front of Red and Bella. “Who the fuck does that belong to?”
Red looks at me in disgust. “You already know.”
I slam my hands on the table, but she doesn’t jump. “I haven’t got time for your cryptic bullshit,” I bellow.
Rock pulls me back out of his ol’ lady’s face. “That’s enough,” he yells, his tone warning.
I look past him. “For fuck’s sake, Red, just tell me. Is it yours?”
Rock frowns at me, looking over his shoulder at the test resting on the table.
Red stands, picking it up and pushing it to my chest. “No, Drifter. It’s your fucking wife’s test,” she hisses. “The woman you’re supposed to love and cherish is having your fucking child after all these years, and when she rushed to tell you, what did she find? You shagging a whore.”
My heart rips in my chest. The pain is almost physical as I clutch the test tightly in my grasp. “Where the fuck is she?” I demand.
Red shrugs like she couldn’t give two fucks I’m falling apart. She sits back down, ignoring me. I look across at Bella. Her eyes are full of disappointment, and she just shakes her head.
“Tell me where the fuck she’s gone,” I yell.
“More than likely as far away from you as she can get,” Red grits out.
“You expect me to believe she hasn’t told you where she’s going?”
“If she wanted to escape and didn’t want you knowing, why the hell would she tell us? She knows you’ll just get your brothers to hound us.”
“She can’t be out there alone, Red. Fuck!”
I run out to the front gates and shout across the yard. “Slayer, has Hell left the compound?”
He shakes his head. “No, Pres, but we all know she has ways of getting out of here without being seen.”
“I need the tyre changed on my bike now,” I order.
“Pres, what about the gate—”
“Now!”
ROCHELLE
I half expected to get caught as I snuck out the window. I thought Drifter might have come rushing after me, to try to explain or at least fucking beg me to forgive him. But I slipped out unnoticed, like I’ve done a thousand times before.
My mobile vibrates in my back pocket, and I slide it out, seeing Drifter’s name.
I cancel the call, wondering if he feels embarrassed to have me sneak out again under his watch or whether he feels obligated to find me.
Now, I have to figure out where the fuck I’m going to go. My entire life is back there at the clubhouse. I don’t have friends outside of it, so it’s not like I can crash on someone’s sofa for a few nights.
I unlock my phone and open Google. There has to be somewhere nearby I can stay until I get back on my feet. I pull up hotels, silently praying Drifter doesn’t freeze our joint account.
The low rumble of motorcycles sounds behind me, and I whip around, ready to fight him on this. There’s no way I’m going back to pretend I didn’t just walk in on him getting his fill from someone else.
But the words die in my throat.
It’s not him.
It’s the Steel Delinquents.
The colour drains from my face. I turn back quickly, picking up my pace, praying they don’t recognise me from the other night. My hands tremble as I shove my phone into my pocket. My stomach twists violently, dread seeping into every nerve in my body.
Jesus, I’m walking out on one fucking prick and straight into the hands of another.
Reaper’s motorcycle slows beside me then stops. He jumps off and speed walks to stop in front of me.
“Well, well, well. Look what we have here.” He tips his head to one side, smirking. “Drifter should really take better care of his ol’ lady.”
My mouth goes dry, and my eyes dart around, looking for anything I can use to make my getaway. His smirk widens. “You shouldn’t be walking round this part of town, my darlin’. A pretty little thing like you could get hurt.”
Reaper circles me as his men gather around us.
“Look at that fine ass,” he murmurs, slapping my backside. I jump forward into the path of one of his goons and drop my bag.
One of his men picks it up, and I lunge forward, trying to grab hold of it. He steps back, snatching it out of my reach.
“No need to panic, darlin’, I got it,” says Reaper, taking the bag and unzipping it.
My skin crawls at his close proximity. I shake out my shoulders so it passes. Pull yourself together, Rochelle. You grew up around these types of men. You know the drill.
“Where would you be going with a bag full of clothes?” he asks, arching a curious brow.
“Well,” I spit, snatching the bag out of his grasp, “when you dirty fucking bikers get caught with your dick in some other chick, there’s no other choice.”
Reaper throws his head back, laughing. “Drifter fucking someone else? The man’s got bigger balls than I thought.”
I try to push past him, but he grabs hold of my arm. “Where do you think you’re going?” he snarls.
I quash my fear. “Well, you don’t need me because Drifter and I are done. Over. Finished. You might have more luck with the club whore he’s screwing.”
“Darlin’, nice try, but you know as well as I do that he’ll do anything to get you back,” he says, winking. “And you walked right into my hands. It might be worth putting the lottery on tonight, fellas. I think our luck’s in.”
I try to pull away from his grasp, but he tightens his grip. “Let’s not play silly bastards,” he mutters, his tone bored. “You, my darlin’, are my leverage, so you’re not going anywhere.”
He turns to one of his men. “Get a van down here pronto before Drifter realises she’s missing. She’ll be my date for this evening.”
I close my eyes and take a steadying breath. I wasn’t about to wait for Drifter to come rescue me. I don’t need him. I didn’t before now, and I still don’t.