Chapter 8
CHAPTER EIGHT
Phoebe’s body felt quite strange the following morning.
Because she had never experienced the touch of a man before, she wanted to believe that it was due to the foreign nature of the sensations that she was unable to take her mind off it. But there was something about it that stuck with her.
As she went about her morning getting ready for the day ahead, she found that she could still feel him – his strong but gentle grip on her hips, his mouth over her skin, the taste of the kisses they shared. She could swear that her lips were still warm with the feeling of his on them.
It made it hard to focus on much else, and for a moment, she wondered if she even wanted to.
‘I will give you a week to prepare. I'd like you to feel more comfortable – accustomed to the idea of what it is we need to do. And then, we will consummate the marriage.’
His words made her feel somewhat conflicted for some reason.
While she felt relieved that she would get some time to reconcile with the idea of what they were to do – whilst also acclimating to her new life – she couldn’t help but wonder if it would be better if they had simple gotten it over and done with.
“Good morning – Your Grace!” Jenny exclaimed, startled by the sight of her as she walked into the room. “I – ah – my apologies, Your Grace. I should have gotten up earlier to wake you up.”
Phoebe stared at her in confusion. “W-What do you mean? Why would you need to wake me up when I am perfectly capable of doing it myself?”
“That is my duty, Your Grace. I should be always be able to provide you with support. Because of my inadequacy, you had to get ready by yourself. I promise to do better, henceforth!”
“Oh,” Phoebe exhaled, flustered. “Oh, no, that will not be necessary, Jenny. I assure you, I can handle this task on my own. I have been doing it all my life.”
“Yes, but... you’re the duchess. Now you do not have to,” the maid pointed out delicately.
Phoebe understood what she meant, but her mind could not comprehend being so dependent to the point she could not get herself out of bed or dress herself.
“I-I was up at the crack of dawn because I could not sleep – likely because this was my first time in a new place. Perhaps I was a tad nervous. Do not worry, I am sure if you were to arrive tomorrow at the same time you did today, you will be able to help,” Phoebe suggested, feeling strangely persuaded to act according to the younger girl’s whims.
“Are you certain, Your Grace?” Jenny questioned hopefully.
“Yes,” Phoebe said, relenting whatever upper hand she might have held previously.
It was worth it to see Jenny’s spirits rise and she launched into a detailed explanation of how concerned the cook was because the duchess had skipped dinner and had put together the most delicious looking breakfast he could.
It was good to focus on Jenny’s voice and her excited speech reminded Phoebe of Anna.
A sudden pang of homesickness sent small flashes of pain through her chest and she wondered how her siblings were faring without her.
They had always been together, ever since the passing of their parents – having resolved to stick by each other, no matter what. When they had made that promise, they were only small children, lost and grieving, unsure of what would come next for them.
And somehow, Phoebe felt like that now, in a house she was meant to adapt to, with a title she had never once dreamed would be hers.
She felt immensely out of place as she was led to a table laden with mouth-watering food in the largest dining room she had ever been in.
It was all so foreign and new, leaving her feeling like a foundling with a future which was uncertain in some ways.
The sight of a single place arranged for a meal made her feel even worse somehow, because for a moment, she had hoped that there would be more beyond the convenient guidelines of their marriage.
“We hope the meal is to your liking, Your Grace. If there is anything that doesn’t suit your taste, please inform us, so that we know not to include it again,” Maude told her as Jenny served some food onto her plate.
“I am sure everything is as delicious as it all looks, thank you.” Phoebe said kindly as the generously laden plate was set before her.
As she ate, her eyes kept drifting to the other side of the table, unable to keep herself from wondering if this is what it would always be like. Her desire to skip dinner last night had not been contested either, which implied he likely had not been present for that meal either.
Everything was as delicious as she knew they would be, but Phoebe feared her mind was far too distracted to wholly enjoy it. Still, she felt the need to extend her gratitude in person.
“Your Grace!” Liam, the cook, gasped in surprise when Phoebe walked into the kitchen.
“I apologize for startling you,” Phoebe stated, a little taken aback by his reaction.
“I merely wished to tell you that breakfast was simply wonderful. I am sorry that I was unable to attend dinner, though. I was far too tired to have any appetite and I fear that you put in a lot of effort for nothing.”
“That is not true, Your Grace. I understood that you likely did not feel interested in a meal and I had no qualms with it. But I ensured to put my all into ensuring breakfast was acceptable and it means the world to me that you came all the way here to extend your appreciation. If there is something you need – whatever you might crave at odd hours even – please, allow me to serve you.” He told her graciously.
It was quite the exaggerated reaction, but Phoebe could feel the sincerity in his words and it made her thankful that she had agreed to come and see him.
“Thank you, Liam. That was very kind of you to say. I look forward to trying your other culinary delicacies,” she replied sincerely.
The cook bowed to her and Phoebe realized she was growing somewhat accustomed to the display of formality because she did not feel the immediate urge to repeat the action.
As she left the kitchen with Maude trailing behind her, she admitted to the housekeeper,
“I am afraid I do not know the responsibilities of a duchess, but I am willing to learn all about it, as soon as possible. Would it be too much to ask that you brief me on what is expected of the new duchess of Montford? Other than the obvious, of course.”
“Why, certainly, Your Grace,” Maude nodded sagely.
“As the duchess, you are meant to paint a reliable picture to the ton and the household. Due to the prestige that comes with the title, the family is being watched closely and as such, you must portray an exceptional standard when it comes to etiquette, interion design and dress style. You must be respected, revered – and perhaps even envied – by members of the ton. To the household, you will be required to manage the overall staff and draft the household budget. You will also be expected to host grand events that might be used to foster good will and build relationships between the duke and the esteemed guests for various reasons. Essentially, you are mean to show proof of His Grace’s capability and magnanimous nature. ”
It all sounded like reasonable duties of one with her title, but Phoebe could not fathom being able to carry out the latter roles that involved socializing and hosting events.
She had only watched her mother put together nice dinners for special guest on a handful of occasions and was not old enough to learn much about how it was done at the time.
She feared whatever attempt she made might lead to embarrassing results.
Her concerns must have shown across her expression because Maude’s gaze softened and she spoke up,
“Do not fret, Your Grace. I, and the rest of the staff as well, are here to help however you require us to. For now, you can ease into things by focusing on the household. You are the lady of the house, first and foremost. If there are things that are not to your liking, you can simply point it out and we will replace it with something else that suits your tastes. However you wish to run this household, we are here to serve and satisfy.”
It sounded like a simple enough place to start, so Phoebe nodded, determined to learn as quickly as possible in order not to be regarded as incompetent or useless.
“That sounds wonderful. Perhaps we should begin with that?” she proposed.
Maude nodded and gestured down the hall. “Certainly, Your Grace. Right this way.”
For the next two hours, they walked around the house, exploring the rooms Phoebe had already seen the day before.
Everything had seemed so large and overwhelming the night before, and as such, she had not only been in awe of it all.
Now that she was aware of her role in the house, she paid closer attention to the wallpapers, rugs and furniture.
It was also so seamlessly organized and clear, without a single hair out of place. However, it was somewhat evident that the estate lacked a woman’s touch.
The housekeeper and maids did what they could, keeping the house warm and full of light, but there were hardly flowers to brighten up the space or add a dash of colour and sweet smells in the air. Some things were also out of style and Phoebe could tell that she ha some work to do.
When she pointed out the curtains and rugs of a drawing room did not match and would have to be replaced to something that complimented both items as well as the room as a whole, the housekeeper nodded proudly as she remarked,
“You have a keen eye for detail, Your Grace. Much like the previous duchess. She was fond of this house and spent her days committed to making it a wonderful home for her family.”
“I am honoured you think so, Maude,” Phoebe blushed at the compliment. “She sounds like she was a wonderful duchess.”
“She was. Her Grace was brave and kind – effortlessly so. It was quite difficult on the duke when she passed.”