Chapter Nineteen #5
There was a time I “dated” a girl online who I met through the main Custom Dungeon World forum. She was the first girl who ever gave me any attention who wasn’t obligated to in some way, and I fell for her insanely fast.
I ended up sending her over a hundred messages the first day I didn’t hear from her.
Then she came back, called me crazy, told me to get help, and admitted that she was a he.
And so went my first love.
I’m sorry for letting you down, my fellow attachment issues haver, I thought to Stella.
So, to make it up to Stella, I took a cheesy selfie that featured me winking and captioned it with, “I’m back, baby.”
Then I deleted it because I cringed at myself too hard.
I took a normal selfie after that and sent it to her.
She replied as instantly as was possible.
>Sev!
>Sevevsvevesecsevsevsevsevsevsev!
>Good morning!!!!!!
>Mwah!
>I msised you!
>missed*
>How do you feel? Are you okay?
>I JUST NOTICED THE RED EYES
>THOSE LOOK SO GOOD ON YOU
>THOSE AREN’T CONTACTS RIGHT? THEY’RE FROM THE WHOLE VAMPIRE THING?
>Also, you need to send me more selfies! I want a whole album of you!
>We also need to take a cute couples picture that I can set for your picture in my contacts!
>oh
>sorry, I’m probably spamming you too much.
You’re not spamming me enough.GOOD MORNING, DARLING~!!! ??????????????????????
>??????
>???????????
>????
>??????????????????????????
>??????
>?????????????????????????????????
>I’m so happy you’re awake!
Glad to be awake, especially since it means getting to text you.Hi Lupa! Give her some pets for me!
I promise you she gets enough of those, but yeah, I’ll give her even more.Can… you pretend that didn’t happen, please? I’m serious. I don’t want you to hate me by thinking about those.
Hate you? No way. I used to be the same way when I was younger. Honestly, if any of you suddenly went out of contact with me for a day without saying anything, I’d probably freak out and spam them like crazy, or go looking for them.…
>You don’t… hate a girl who blows up your phone because you didn’t text her back fast enough?
It’s my fault for not warning you about what I was doing.It’s okay! I promise!
>I shouldn’t have freaked out!
>But… would you really, really act like that?
I would, but don’t test it, please.I won’t!
>Promise.
>Also… it makes me happy that we’re the same.
I’ve got so many issues that you wouldn’t believe it.I’m in! My king~ ?
Glad to have you, my queen.I just kissed my phone so many times
There, I just kissed mine.GFDHFSDHFDSHGFDSHDS
>YOU’RE TOO CUTE AHHHHH HOW ARE YOU REAL
no uno u!!!
>Hehehe. Hey, send me another selfie.
Alright, hang on.More than good enough, but never enough.
>Thanks, Darling~!
>Also.
>HOW DID YOU EVEN FIND A VAMPIRE?
>LUPA TOLD ME THAT YOU BECAME ONE AND THAT IT’S OKAY AND YOU’RE SAFE, BUT HOW?
>THE GUILD HASN’T EVEN SPOTTED A VAMPIRE IN OVER 50 YEARS
>DOESN’T THIS MEAN YOU FOUND
>wait
>You totally seduced a vampire, didn’t you?
(insert gif of a cartoon character sliding backwards into a bush here)What?
Sorry, the phones here don’t have a feature for embedding gifs, so I had to type the gif out myself.…
>So you did seduce a vampire.
We even share a family name now.I’d totes be jealous that you seduced another girl so quickly
>but you basically just asked if I want to marry you
>sooooooooo
>I forgive you.
> ?
Is it something that needs forgiveness in the first place?Maybe.
>jk
>I’m not some girl who is going to get jealous because you get a hundred other wives.
I don’t think I’m getting anywhere near that many.At this rate, you are.
It’s not like I’m trying, okay?Wow, you’re so pro at seducing girls that you don’t even have to try.
That wasn’t what I meant!Yet.
>But it’s okay.
>As long as you still like me, too, then you can have as many wives as you want.
Anyways.Oh…
>So…
>About that…
Sorry if that ruins anything.I was going to tease you by acting like I might be disappointed, but I can’t
>That’s totally okay with me, Darling!
>I hate being around kids anyways. They’re super annoying.
…Aha, sorry, sorry! That’s why I didn’t tease you even more!
>Forgive me?
I guess I can do that.AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
>So happy so happy so happy!!!!!
>lol, Zoey just scolded me. sorry, hang on, clients.
Oh, are you working? Sorry, didn’t know I’d be distracting you.It’s okay!
>And yeah. But I was totes ignoring my line to text you, lol.
>Oh, by the way.
>I don’t want you to feel like I’m hiding anything from you, so…
>There was another guy here earlier.
>He came to my line and wouldn’t stop staring at my chest, then asked me to join his party.
>I told him no, obviously.
>Oh, and I told him I have a boyfriend, so too late for you to have regrets now!
>But something was weird. Like, his whole vibe was off, you know?
>Then this draconid girl with him got pissed off at me because I rejected him.
>Leah totally came in clutch and threatened to call the guards if they didn’t leave me alone.
>But yeah.
>I don’t want you to think I’m hiding talking to other guys from you or anything, even if they’re annoying guys who I wish wouldn’t talk to me in the first place.
Another guy? And he had a dragon girl with him?Yeah to all of that.
>Gods, he super pissed me off.
>He was saying stuff like how he knew nobody else would like me because of how fat I am, so I should be happy that he wants me. Reminded me of my ex, but somehow even more punchable.
>He acted like he’s never been rejected before.
>But hey, most guys probably haven’t been rejected before.
>Still.
>Fucking asshole.
>At least he proved why you’re the best.
>Sorry, swearing isn’t cute.
You can swear as much as you want. I don’t care.Oh, Darling, you have no idea just how much venting you opened yourself up to listening from me then, lol.
>DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON HOW MANY TIMES ADVENTURERS COME HERE TO COMPLETE A QUEST WITHOUT FILLING OUT AN INTENT TO COMPLETE FORM
>GODS
>NO MATTER HOW MANY FUCKING TIMES I TELL THEM THEY HAVE TO FILL OUT AN INTENT TO COMPLETE FORM WHEN ACCEPTING A QUEST, THEY DON’T DO IT, GO OUT, DO THE QUEST, THEN WONDER WHY WE CAN’T GIVE THEM THE REWARD
>…
>sorry
Looks like I’ll have to hurry up on turning you into a housewife.plsplsplsplsplsplsplspls
>I swear I lose another brain cell every day I work here, and I know I don’t have that many in the first place
>I won’t be a good housewife if I become too stupid from work first
>T_T
Cute.It’s okay, you don’t have to worry.
>I’m loyal.
>You really are insanely special.
>Nobody can compare to you.
I’m not worried about that. I believe in you.Hey, is everything alright?
>This feels really serious
>Are you okay?
I’m more worried about you than me.Okay.
>My shift ends in a couple hours.
Actually, I’ll have you stay over here until we know everything is fine.Is this all an excuse to invite me over to play with lost pencils, you perv?
It’s not. I promise.Oh.
>Sorry.
>I’m getting scolded again, so I’m going to focus on work for a bit.
I’ll be over soon.There’s only one pencil I’m interested in losing now.
>?
I tucked my phone into my pocket and gave Lupa a couple of pats to get her attention. “Lupa.”
Lupa let out a little yawn before opening her eyes and looking up at me. “Mm…?”
“It’s serious. I need you on guard.”
Lupa shot out of bed in an instant, equipped her gear, and stood ready for orders all before I even finished getting out of bed.
No matter how lazy she might have liked to act, she didn’t hesitate to get serious when it mattered.