27. Cassandra #2
“Tell me where the problem is. You don’t want me? I will deal with it. But I want you to stay, regardless. You want your own space?” He motioned around. “The cabin’s done. We’ll go back to the way things were supposed to be.”
“What if I disappoint myself?” I whispered.
The lines wrinkling his forehead softened as tears welled up in my eyes.
“What if I disappoint you? What if I disappoint the girls? I don’t want to hurt them. I told you—I’m not warm and fuzzy.”
Christian eased out of his seat and rounded the table until he was cupping my cheeks.
“You know what we do when there’s a dust storm?
” His lips were soft as he pressed them to my forehead.
“We stand at the windows and watch, because being near something that powerful and uncontainable is worth the risk.”
“Morning, beautiful.” Christian’s beard tickled my neck as he kissed his way down my throat and across my shoulder.
I shivered as goosebumps skittered across my skin. Groaning, I rolled into him and nuzzled into his chest. “Too early.”
“I’m sorry I kept you up late,” he mumbled unapologetically as he slid his hand up and down my waist.
It was still dark outside, though the light behind the windows was turning from black to royal blue as it crept closer and closer to dawn.
I smirked and stretched my legs, curling my toes like a cat. I could still feel the ache from being absolutely railed last night. “I wanna go back to sleep.”
His chuckle was soft and deep as he pulled me closer. “Fine by me.”
“But I should go,” I yawned.
“Stay a few more minutes,” he asked quietly, rolling onto his back and pulling me on top of him. “Just a little longer.”
I settled into the soft bulk of his chest and stomach and felt my heart rate slow.
Christian smiled as he lifted an arm and pushed his hair out of his face. “I used to have abs,” he said sheepishly. “It’s been a long ten years. Sorry you missed ’em.”
“I’m not sorry at all,” I said with a happy sigh against his chest as I smoothed my hand up and down the gentle mountains and valleys of his torso. “If I didn’t make it clear before, I’m quite attracted to you.”
His beard twitched. “Yeah?”
“Mhmm.” I closed my eyes and decided a few more minutes in his bed wouldn’t hurt.
“You make me feel safe. I love when you hug me because it feels like nothing in the world can touch me. You’re like a cave where I can hide when I’ve had a bad day and I know nothing can hurt me.
And if memory serves, this body—” I tapped his sternum “—made me come three times last night.”
Christian’s cock thickened beneath me. “More where that came from.” He kissed my head. “Go back to sleep.”
“I need to get up before?—”
Like I had conjured it, feet thundered overhead.
I groaned. “Before the girls get up. Why do they wake up so fucking early? I thought teenagers were supposed to want to sleep all day.”
“Something you should know about kids…” He tucked his arm behind his head, making his bicep bulge. “Whenever you don’t want them to catch you, they will.”
“Then I should go back to my room before they come downstairs.”
“Cass, we’re both dressed. It’s fine.”
“I’m not wearing a bra.”
His hand found my boob and squeezed. “I’m not complaining.”
“You’re insatiable.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I tipped my chin up. “I still hate that.”
Christian grinned, rolling us both over until he was on top of me, bracketing my arms with his. He pulled down the neckline of my tank top and buried his face in my chest. “Always insatiable for you, my queen.”
I rolled my eyes and shooed him away. “Off. I have morning breath and your children will be down here any second. I need to get back to my room.”
Christian rolled to his side and yanked me into him until we were spooning. “I told you it’s fine. We’re not naked. We’re not partaking in adult activities.”
I pulled his arms a little tighter around my waist. “I’m not ready for it.”
Four days ago, Christian and I hashed it out in the cabin. He cleared up his wants and needs, and listened as I talked through what scared me about getting involved with him.
I promised to think about staying on staff after the groundbreaking, and he promised to prove to me that I could handle being in a relationship with a single father.
Hence, why I was in his bed, struggling to motivate myself to get out of his arms.
Every night, I’d sneak into his room after we were certain the girls were asleep. And every morning I’d sneak back to my room before they were awake.
There had only been one or two near-misses, but so far no one was the wiser.
Except Claire. She definitely knew, which meant most of the over-eighteen population of the ranch knew as well.
CJ gave me shit for it the next time I met up with him to go riding.
I gave him shit for being a miserable son of a bitch.
Even Ray called to give Christian his two cents.
But, at my request, no one said a word to the girls about Christian and me. It made the ‘figuring it out ’ part a little easier.
Christian had worked so hard to give Bree and Gracie stability. I didn’t want to mess that up by letting them get their hopes up about a precarious relationship.
“Dad!” Bree shouted as she stomped down the stairs.
“Shit,” I muttered as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes. Christian had lulled me back into a warm slumber and I forgot I needed to get out.
Christian tipped his head away from my ear and yelled. “Yeah, baby. What do you need?”
“Can Miss Cass do my hair for school today? I want curls and you hate the curling iron.”
“I can use a fucking curling iron,” he grumbled under his breath.
I clapped my hand over my mouth to hide my laughter.
“Uh, maybe if she wakes up in time, but you’ll have to ask her,” he yelled back.
“Can you ask her?” Bree countered.
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not the Wicked Witch of the West.”
Christian leaned close to my ear. “You have some reputation damage control to do, then. I’ve been telling everyone your broom is in the shop and that’s why you have to hitch rides everywhere.”
I swatted his stomach.
A lazy smile graced him. It was a good look.
“I’ll ask her when she comes out of her room,” he hollered, spinning a little white lie.
Silently, I mouthed, “Thank you.”
Christian nodded.
Bree groaned. “Ugh. Dad, I know she’s in your room. I need extra time getting ready today, so I got up early. Y’all are usually up by now anyway. I hear you walking around every morning.”
I dropped my hand onto my face.
“Busted,” he whispered before burying his face into my hair. “She’s got an attitude like her momma had.”
“Thirteen going on thirty. The sass is strong with that one.” With a huff, I yelled, “Give me ten minutes and go start the coffee pot.”
“Thank you!” Bree squealed, scurrying away from the door and running into the kitchen.
I glared at Christian. “You said they’d never know.”
He shrugged. “They do now. But you know what?”
“Hmm?”
Christian tightened his arms around me. “The world didn’t end.”