13.
Meena’s not smiling now. She looks visibly uncomfortable. And if you can imagine how she’s processing that last remark, just think of how I feel. The three of us are in a small room with a dying fire and no exits that don’t involve making things worse.
“What Thalia means is that, uh, you’re my teacher and I respect you and that… we’re friends.”
“I told you that I thought Meena was gorgeous and you agreed,” Thalia says. “Right?”
“I—yes,” I say, directing my answer at Thalia. I’m almost afraid to look at Meena but I know I have to.
When I do, I see that her expression is surprised but also curious. Maybe, possibly even pleased. There’s a hint of a smile on her face but it’s hard to know what that smile means.
“Gorgeous,” Meena repeats. “Suay, chai mai?”
“Yes,” I answer. “It means beautiful. Very beautiful.”
She chuckles, looking briefly at her tea.
“I didn’t know that,” she says, not sure what else she can say.
“Is that okay?” Thalia asks. “I hope I’m not making you uncomfortable.”
“Yes, okay,” Meena says. “I love compliment.”
I don’t know whether to jump in, and if so how. I don’t want to pretend that I don’t find Meena attractive, but I would never have asked my girlfriend to announce it for me.
“Thalia is very honest,” I say. “She says just what she thinks.”
“Too much, right?” Thalia says.
Meena shrugs.
“Normal for you,” she says.
“But it’s normal for everyone, I know,” Thalia says. “We don’t know each other very well yet.”
Meena nods. She’s not looking at either of us, just turning her cup of tea in her hands.
“But I want to talk to you just like a sister,” Thalia says. “And I may be the little sister, but I want to encourage you. You can have a boyfriend if you want. Right, Michael?”
“There’s no reason I can see,” I say. “Any guy would be lucky.”
“Well,” Meena says. “Nobody ask me.”
She gives this smile, this shy smile that starts my heart going faster. With that look I see something I haven’t seen before. She’s not uncomfortable anymore. She’s getting bolder and she’s letting me see it.
“I, uh—would you want someone to ask you?”
“Who?” she asks, turning the question back around on me. I’m not going to get out of answering this.
“Well, me and Thalia are together, of course—“
“Of course!” Meena answers quickly. “Understand.”
She looks deflated, like the game we’ve been playing has suddenly turned serious without warning. I can see it in the way her shoulders settle.
“But I—Meena, I never wanted to—“
“He respects you as a teacher and cares about you as a friend,” Thalia jumps in. “He doesn’t want to do anything that would get in the way of that.”
“Thank you, Thalia,” I say. “Yes, that’s true.”
“Okay, no problem,” Meena says quickly. “Don’t worry.”
Meena’s mother calls from the next room. She answers and then sets her mug down.
“Sorry,” she says. “One moment.”
“Sure,” I say.
She gets up and we’re left alone. I turn my palms upward and widen my stare in the universal gesture that means—okay, what the hell?
Thalia shrugs, signaling that she doesn’t need to explain, has nothing to apologize for, and will talk to me about it later but only to press her case, not to concede anything. That’s what her expression says to me anyway. I may be reading too much into it.
Meena returns after a few moments but doesn’t take her seat.
“Sorry,” Meena says. “I need to talk with my brother first.”
I’ve noticed from listening that Thais have a tendency to say they need to do something “first” without having anything in particular they have to do second. It’s a habit that carries over from direct translation.
“Okay,” I say. “I feel like taking a walk. Thalia, you want to come with me?”
“Of course.”
I rise from my spot on the floor and offer a hand.
She takes it and I hoist her to her feet.
We go out first and then Meena walks in the direction of Sorn’s hut.
There are no locks on the doors here, of course, so we won’t need to worry about being let in when we get back.
We walk down to the creek, far enough that the sound of the water covers our voices.
I realize that even if we’re overheard we likely won’t be understood by anyone but Meena.
But I still do a quick glance around before asking.
“What was that?”
“Me? Why did you let Meena think you don’t like her? I stuck my neck out for you.”
“You made her uncomfortable,” I say, not harshly, but it has to be said.
“I realize that, and I’m sorry,” she says. “But what did we come here for, really? Just a visit?”
“We just got here,” I say. “You just met her this afternoon, and now you’re trying to set us up?”
“Yes, damn it! Meena is a great girl. She deserves a good man. You are a good man. So, what’s the problem?”
I sigh. I realize that I shouldn’t be fighting this, but I keep seeing the look on Meena’s face when she thought I was cutting off whatever we’d been edging toward.
“Can I be honest with you?” Thalia asks.
“Yes, sure.”
“You’re a really attractive guy,” she says. “And I don’t just mean your looks.”
“Well, thank you, that’s nice.”
“But you’re too passive!” Thalia says. She’s keeping her voice low but the feeling behind it is loud enough. “A girl like Meena is not going to make a move with you, dude! Most women wouldn’t do that. It’s a hard thing for us.”
“What do you expect me to do? Flirt with her right in front of you? How is she supposed to react to that?”
“I don’t like making anyone uncomfortable,” she says.
“But you have got to see that if you aren’t willing to take a chance while we’re here, you’ll lose your shot with her.
If you don’t at least let her know clearly that you’re interested in her, no games, that’s it.
You’re in the friend zone forever. Do you really want her to just be your Thai teacher? ”
I pause, but I don’t really need to search my feelings. I’m attracted to Meena. I think she at least finds me interesting, but is probably scared that my girlfriend is laying a trap.
“Okay, you’re right,” I say. “Either it happens while we’re here or it doesn’t happen.”
“And?”
“And I do want it to happen,” I say. “But she’s up here. And we’re in Phuket.”
“Urgh!” Thalia says, not quite a squeal, not quite a groan, somewhere in between. “Don’t make up excuses. Just stop overthinking things! How did you ever get two girlfriends in the first place?”
“That was kind of a special circumstance,” I say.
“Well, this time, it’s not going to happen unless you make it happen.”
“Okay, you’re right,” I say, putting my arms around her. “Can we just take a breath? Let her process and respond?”
“I’m not saying anything more,” she says. “I got the ball rolling. Now the rest is on you.”
“Fine,” I say. “And thank you. I don’t want you to think that I’m ungrateful. It’s not a lot of women who would do that for their boyfriend.”
“I know,” she says, with evident pride.
I pull her to me and we hug. I just hold her there, not wanting to let go as we rock slowly under the canopy of trees.
A moment later I hear a rustling in the branches above us and look up to see a gibbon watching us from maybe ten meters up, completely still, one hand wrapped around a branch.
It stares at us with the patient, interested expression of an animal that has no idea it’s supposed to be afraid.
“Hey, look!” I say. “We’ve got a friend.”
We separate and Thalia turns toward him. He looks back at her, head tilting slightly, and then lopes to the end of his branch and launches off it, catching another on the way down and swinging through the canopy in that easy arc, already gone.
We watch until the trees stop moving. Then we turn to each other.
“Can we talk about the other thing? The fact that you now have a chance to stay in Thailand for a whole year, maybe longer?”
“How do you feel about it?” she asks, tilting her head up to look at me.
I shrug, pretending not to care. She grins and pushes me away with both hands.
“Oh, yeah? Fine, I’m leaving you in the forest! Good luck finding your way back on your own.”
I grab her arm and spin her back to face me, then pull her close so that our foreheads are touching.
“The hut’s over there,” I say, pointing without looking because I’m busy staring into her eyes. “And I’m so excited and relieved to know that we don’t have to separate after all.”
“So, I guess this means your temporary girlfriend is about to become—what? Your permanent girlfriend?”
It’s a test, a challenge, and a playful one.
“I can’t stop craving you,” I say honestly. “Learning that you can stay here with me is the second best thing that’s ever happened to me since I moved here.”
And then I whisper, close to her ear. “What we did in the pool, that was the first.”
“Really?”
“Well, maybe what you did for me in the front room when we came home from hiking up Monkey Hill was the first.”
“I can do it again,” she says. “Just not right now. Somebody might see, and there are ants and stuff that I don’t want to bite me when I’m on my knees.”
“That’s fair.”
“But tonight, when we’re alone and it’s dark, we can do stuff.”
“Awesome.”
We walk around a little more, but the trees here are so dense and the trails are narrow and I don’t want to venture too far from the village.
The light is different in here. Everything is greener, quieter, the sounds that come through the canopy less like birds and more like the forest thinking.
We find our way back to Meena’s hut and find her outside, crouching over a big plastic tray of vegetables she’s rinsing in water from the stream, the leaves dripping between her fingers.
“Everything okay with Sorn?” I ask.
She flicks the water from her fingertips and looks at me curiously.
“Oh, Sorn,” she says. “His name is Sorn not Sorn.”
“Uh, sorry,” I say. “I don’t really hear the difference.”
“Change the tone, change the meaning,” she says. “His name means arrow, not teach.”
“Oh,” I say.