Now and Forever
T WO MONTHS LATER
The gardens of the Marchetti estate bloomed in defiance of the approaching autumn. Stone gargoyles kept watch from the corners of the enormous property, their weathered faces holding centuries of secrets.
Cadence stood at the edge of the fountain, trailing her fingers through the cool water. She had grown used to this place over the past months, finding comfort in its ancient stones and formal beauty. The gargoyles no longer seemed threatening, merely watchful. Protective, even.
"He's here again."
Cadence didn't turn at the sound of Potenziana Marchetti's voice. La Strega moved with surprising grace for a woman of her age, the strand of pearls at her throat catching the late morning light as she came to stand beside Cadence.
"This makes it, what? The twentieth time?"
"Twenty-third," Cadence said reluctantly, "over eight weeks." And it gave her no pleasure to know this.
"You've been counting," La Strega observed shrewdly. "Not exactly something one would do if she didn't really care, no?"
Cadence made a face. "I know what you're trying to do, signora ."
"Then you should be able to guess what I'm about to tell you, sì? "
Cadence suddenly found it difficult to breathe. She should've known this time would come. But even so. "Signora —-"
The older woman's face softened. "I understand you are scared."
"Then—-"
"But—-" La Strega's tone was final. "You cannot delay the inevitable, bambina. Your husband is clearly at the end of his tether. He may wage war if he doesn't see for himself that you are well."
She shook her head. "He wouldn't—-"
"Trust me on this, mm ? The men of my world are my...expertise."
Cadence couldn't help smiling despite everything. That was actually an understatement, considering how La Strega had so expertly arranged marriages for all of her grandchildren. She had found Cesare's missing bride. Stopped Massimo from marrying the wrong twin. And so forth.
But...
"I can't keep being a burden to him," Cadence choked out.
"Just talk to Keiran," La Strega urged her. "Once and for all. And if you still do not want to go back to him—-" The matriarch's tone turned steely. "Then you will not. You are in Boston, after all."
****
K EIRAN WAS ALREADY expecting someone to ask him to leave.
He was already planning his next visit in fact.
And it was why, upon turning around, he had the shock of his life upon seeing his wife.
Cadence.
The sight of her after so long hit Keiran with physical force. She was still too beautiful for his heart to bear. Too innocent. And right now, a little too thin and pale for his comfort.
"I'm glad to see you're well." Cadence was the first one to break the silence between them. "I never got the chance to thank you for helping my parents—-"
"I didn't do it for them. I did it for you."
Cadence's fingers dug into her palms. "I didn't want you to risk your life—-"
"I'd do it again if I have to."
Of course he would, Cadence thought, and that was what had been breaking her heart for so many weeks now.
Keiran shoved his hands deep into his pockets. Why was this so hard? Why did it feel so damn awkward between them? His gaze scanned her still-too-pale features, and his chest tightened.
"You lost weight," he said tautly.
She nodded, and he immediately felt like an arse.
"I'm sorry." Why was he so bad at this? "I meant...you look beautiful."
"You don't have to lie—-"
"I'm not," he countered sharply.
She nodded again, and Keiran had a bad feeling he was just making things worse with every word he uttered.
" Signora Marchetti said you wanted to see me?"
"And you know why that is."
Cadence's throat tightened. She hadn't expected him to be so forthcoming, and she just didn't know how to feel about that.
"Cadence—-"
Hearing her name on his lips hurt.
More than she was prepared to.
And because she didn't know what to do about that either—-
"I, um, started taking Italian lessons."
Cadence found herself starting to babble instead—-
" Signora says I'm learning at an impressive speed."
Anything to distract her from the pain gnawing at her heart.
"I've also been helping out with one of the restaurants they own. I've been busy, really busy. Italian recipes are—-"
"Is this your way of telling me you've started a new life without me?"
No.
Never.
But if she said any of those things, wouldn't she end up being a burden to him again?
"Look at me."
It hurt to hear the tightness of his voice.
But what else was there for her to do?
She started to shake her head. "Can we just—-"
"Take me back."
Her gaze flew up to him.
"Take me back, Cadence."
Those were her words before.
"Please."
And it broke her heart to hear him say them back to her.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
More than he would ever know.
"But no."
The rejection hit him like a physical blow, and Keiran felt the blood drain from his face.
"Why?" The question escaped before he could stop it, desperate and raw.
"I just can't," she whispered, and for a moment he thought she might cry.
Keiran felt as if he was about to lose everything. Again .
But this time would be final.
This time there would be no more visits, no more chances.
The finality of it crushed the air from his lungs.
"At least tell me why—-"
"Please just go." Her voice broke. "I don't want to hear anymore."
She turned to leave, and something inside Keiran snapped.
He couldn't lose her again.
Not like this.
"Don't do this." Keiran moved after her, not touching her but close enough that she stopped. "Please don't leave me. Don't—" His own voice cracked. "Tell me what you want, I'll give it to you. It's not like before now. I'm not...I was never...I won't make life hard for you again."
But all she did was stare at him, with tears running down her cheeks.
God, please.
Why did it feel like the more words he said, the more the distance between them grew?
Please help me.
Keiran tried again, more desperately. "I...I have a home in France. More than one, actually. They're all yours. We can live there. Or wherever you want. Whatever you want. I'll... I'll even pretend I like your parents. You can choose them over me anytime. I'll make it up to you any way—"
"Stop it." Cadence could no longer bear hearing more of these concessions.
"Then tell me," he bit out. "Tell me—-"
"There's nothing you can do," she said shakily. "Nothing. I can't keep being a burden—-"
"You were never a burden," Keiran gritted out.
"Then what would you call being forced to marry me because of a blood debt?" she demanded brokenly.
Keiran could not believe what he was hearing.
"I don't want—-"
Fingers gripped her shoulders, cutting her words short.
And then he was giving her a hard shake as if he believed she had lost her senses.
"You got it all wrong," Keiran said fiercely. "Completely wrong."
"M-My b-brother—-"
"—-wanted to kill me for marrying you."
She stared at him, unable to understand what he was saying.
"He wanted me to protect you from afar. Not make you my wife and have you enter the world he had tried to keep you from."
"I d-don't understand."
"I had no right to be with you," Keiran said unevenly. "But you were just so hard to stay away from. And you just keep getting into trouble, and the next thing I knew—-"
Cadence could barely hear his voice over the thunderous pounding of her heart.
Was this really happening?
Was it?
Really?
"I fell in love with you."
Keiran... loved her?
"And I never stopped," Keiran said rawly. "I thought I did. When I thought I hated you. But even that was a mistake, and I...I know I don't deserve to be forgiven for that either. I didn't even know I was putting you through hell. You have every right to hate me, but I just...I can't let you go, Cadence. I love you. I will always —-"
Keiran didn't get to finish, with Cadence throwing herself into his arms with such force that they both nearly fell.
His arms closed around her automatically as he lost their balance. They tumbled onto the soft grass, with Keiran making sure he landed on his back and Cadence on top of him.
"Cadence?"
She gazed down at him, and her heart ached upon seeing how her husband—- her husband!—- was still ashen with fear.
"I love you, Keiran," she said, her voice steady despite the tears still glistening on her cheeks. "So, so much."
His kiss was desperate, filled with all the words he couldn't say. When he finally pulled back, Cadence could see the wetness in his own eyes, though he would never admit to tears.
Keiran rolled her to her back, and her tears fell faster at the way his hand shook as he touched her cheek. "I was sure I had lost you."
She shook her head as she covered his hand with hers. "Not possible." Her voice caught. "B-Because I think I know the truth now. I was born to be yours."