Chapter 17 Roxy
“So…where should I sleep?” I asked after starting the dishwasher.
Because he ordered the pizza, I’d volunteered to clean up.
Liam scratched his head as he stared around his apartment. In the living room, he had one of those modular sectional sofas and a huge flatscreen. It would’ve been a cozy place to sleep, but…
“I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I made you sleep on the couch. I’ll go put some fresh sheets on the bed.”
He walked away before I could argue. So I busied myself by wiping down the (luxurious) counters. Then, I opened a cabinet and was surprised to find a row of crystal stemware.
They were nice.
Just like everything else in his place.
It frustrated me, the fact that he chose to improve himself after I left. And now, we were getting divorced.
Frowning, I was about to shut the cabinet, but I stopped myself.
By the time Liam came back, I’d purloined a bottle of cabernet off his wine rack and poured us two generous helpings.
“Nice glasses,” I said, raising mine in one hand and sliding his across the counter with the other.
Liam’s eyes roamed from the wine glass, the bottle, and the empty space in the wine rack. “Sure. Why not?” he said with a sigh.
He strode over, hand extended to pick up the glass. The glint on his ring finger caught my eye. His wedding ring…
My expression must’ve shifted, because Liam noticed and followed my gaze to his wedding band.
“Oh. Yeah,” he said, laughing awkwardly.
He stopped to twist off the ring and held it up to the light, pinched between his index finger and thumb.
It was a Claddagh ring, two clasped hands with a heart in between.
Traditionally, it signalled whether or not the wearer was spoken for, based on the direction of the heart.
If he wore it with the heart facing him, he was taken.
If the heart faced outward, he was single.
Liam slipped the ring back on and flexed his fingers. The heart faced out.
“It feels…different,” he remarked. Apparently shrugging it off, he finally picked up his wine and held it towards me. “To getting divorced.”
I forced myself to laugh, even though there was a tight knot in my chest blocking the way. “To getting divorced!”
I pulled out a stool and sat down right at the island. Liam did the same, sitting close enough to me that his knees could’ve brushed against mine if he changed his position very slightly
“Crazy that we’re getting along now, isn’t it?” Liam said.
“What are you talking about? We’ve always gotten along,” I said.
Liam cracked a smile, though there was a little sadness in his eyes. “It’s probably for the best, huh?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I mean, I feel like we’re both still kids, trying to figure it out.”
“You just gotta have faith that you’re doing what’s right,” Liam said. “Something I learned, doing the types of jobs that I do. It helped me get over you leaving, actually.”
“Liam—”
“I’m not trying to start a fight. Just saying I get it,” Liam said. “I get why you left.”
“Thanks,” I whispered, my mouth gone dry.
“Did you sleep with anyone while you were…”
“One guy. It was just a fling. Nothing serious.”
“Oh yeah? Me, too.”
“I know you’re lying. But it’s okay. I get why you did it, too,” I said.
“Nobody was as good as you, though.”
I let myself laugh at that. “Same.”
My eyes were on his face. I caught the briefest flash of vulnerability. I wasn’t meant to see it, but once I did, I dove for him.
Suddenly, we were kissing.
I’d almost forgotten how good of a kisser Liam was.
He could still make my toes curl while my clothes were still on.
In fact, I was transported, losing myself to him, with his hands running down my sides and tugging my body against his.
I tasted his tongue and his mouth, and I felt the brief scrape of the coarse scruff on his chin against my skin before pressing my hands to his chest.
I pulled away, panting. “Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this.”
“Maybe we should,” Liam said, his voice gruff as he smiled, our faces still close together. “You’re already getting what you want. We can make love one last time for old time’s sake.”
“Don’t call it that,” I said immediately.
“What?”
“You know what.”
“Making love.”
“Yeah. That. We can fuck. Okay?”
Liam was still smiling, but the warmth left his eyes as something shifted behind them. “What is it, Roxy? You don’t love me anymore?”
Goosebumps rose on the skin of my arms, leaving me with an uncomfortable, prickly sensation. I wasn’t sure what to do with my hands except to wrap them around Liam’s wrists, pulling his paws off of my body.
“It shouldn’t matter if I love you or not.”
“Why are you getting uncomfortable?” he said.
“I’m not—I just need space, all right?”
“You kissed me first,” Liam pointed out.
“Seriously? What are you, thirteen? I wasn’t kissing myself. You participated.”
Liam rubbed his face with both of us hands in exasperation.
“Fine. Whatever you say. It’s a good thing both of us stopped before it went too far.
” He stood up and walked a few paces away, then spun around.
“We’re having a family dinner tomorrow night at Da’s.
I think it would be a good time to talk to him. We can bring that folder with us.”
I nodded, feeling somewhat chastened. “I’m good with that plan,” I said quietly.
Liam held my gaze for a long moment. For the first time since reuniting with him, I noticed all the ways his face had changed from the younger version I’d married, the version I’d always remembered.
There were lines at the corners of his eyes and mouth now.
Shadows under his cheekbones. It struck home how much he’d changed.
“Well, I’ll be on the couch if you need me. G’night, Roxy,” he said matter-of-factly.
“Goodnight,” I echoed.
Silently, I watched him flop onto the couch and turn on the giant flatscreen. Then, I picked up my wine glass, retreated to the bedroom, and shut the door.