Chapter 17
"Ithought you’d died!” Elle shrieked as I entered our room with a pile of the belongings I’d accrued during my time in Alandris’ room.
“I thought I was going to have to spend the rest of my year at the Consortium without a roommate! You can’t go off and disappear like that, Nairu.
I worry about you. We’re friends, aren’t we? ”
How close she was to the truth.
“I was pretty deathly sick,” I explained casually, busying myself with putting away my clothes. “I fainted after the ball and spent the rest of the time in quarantine with healers. They weren’t allowing visitors, or I would have asked for you.”
“I’m just glad you’ve recovered.”
“Me too,” I sighed.
Elle bounced up from her bed and leaned on my dresser. “What’s got you so down in the dumps, then?”
I fumbled for a lie that was close enough to the truth to be believable.
“I’m worried about the number of lessons I’ve missed lately.
Most of the Mages are already far ahead of me.
Taking all of this time off is going to put me even farther back.
I’m starting to question why I’m bothering with all of this. ”
“Nairu, you have amazing potential.” Elle frowned. “You know I’ll help you catch up. We can practice together when we have free time. It’s not like you to give up.”
“It’s becoming… a lot.”
“I know what will cheer you up.” She grinned. “Come with me.”
I had serious doubts that there was anything Elle could do to cheer me up after everything I’d learned from Alandris, but I followed her anyway.
Dwelling on what felt like an inescapable situation would not do me any good.
I’d spent enough days rotting underneath the covers, and I’d promised myself long ago I wouldn’t let myself get to that point ever again—the point of giving up and letting the darkness swallow me whole.
Fingers laced with hers, I let Elle lead me to one of the larger training rooms. The sounds of raucous chatter, laughter, and blades striking against one another echoed through the halls just outside of the door.
Before she’d even pushed the door open to reveal the culprits, I recognized a familiar voice, and my heart went into a frenzy.
“Lorian!” I called out, spotting his red head of hair immediately. “You’re back?”
He turned to face me, a beaming smile on his face as he caught me in a hug. “A captain keeps his promises.”
I only let him go to throw myself into Kaelias’s waiting arms. “You’re all back?” I asked nervously.
Kaelias patted my head, releasing me and pointing to the center of the room where Makatza was sparring with, unexpectedly, Kaz. “They’ve been at it for a half hour now, and neither of them has broken a sweat,” he signed.
“See?” Elle cooed. “I thought you might be happy to see your crew.”
I nodded gratefully. “I am. And I have more questions for you all than I know what to do with.”
“Soon, over a meal,” Lorian said. “First, why don’t we enjoy the entertainment?
I have my bets on Makatza, of course, but Kaz has been quite the contender.
I’m thinking of asking him to join the crew.
Imagine the two of them on a battlefield together?
” His brows flicked up, and he shook his head in amazement. “We’d be unstoppable.”
Kaz dwarfed Makatza in sheer size, but a wealth of lean muscle packed her lithe form.
Her agility and flexibility compensated for her lack of brute strength.
Each time Kaz swung his sword down at her, she dodged out of the way in the most impossible of angles, never making a strike at him.
Her method was obvious. She intended to beat him through a battle of stamina, though so far, Kaz hardly looked winded at all.
Kaz chuckled following her latest block and said, “You're not bad. I haven’t had this much fun in a long, long time.”
Makatza growled, bearing her small tusks. “Don’t get cocky. Not over.”
His only answer was another blow towards her midsection, easily dodged. I supposed she didn’t expect what was coming next because none of us onlookers had either. A collective gasp filled the room as Kaz dropped his sword, grabbed Makatza’s waist, and hoisted her up into the air over his head.
“Yield?”
“As if,” she spat back, struggling against his iron grip.
He laughed brightly. “Alright, then. I did ask.”
Kaz threw Makatza down with such force, I was certain he was going to break every bone in her body.
The sound of her crashing into the wooden floor was enough to make me wince and avert my eyes, and I nearly missed her swinging her body into an upright position with nearly impossible feline grace—as if it hadn’t hurt at all.
In an instant, she pointed a knife drawn from her thigh belt at Kaz’s throat. “Yield,” she repeated his words back to him.
His eyes sparkled with humor. “As if.”
“You have a knife to your throat, idiot.”
“And you have one to your heart.” Without her noticing—without anyone in the room noticing—he’d pulled a hidden blade of his own.
The pair stared into each other’s eyes for what felt like an eternity before Lorian cleared his throat and spoke. “Why don’t we call it a draw?”
Makatza glared at her captain, appalled at the idea.
“I’d be honored,” Kaz said, removing his knife from its place pressed against her skin. He tucked it back into his leather holster, taking his eyes off of the opponent in front of him without a care in the world.
“I didn’t say I agreed.”
“Fine, then I yield.”
“What?” She gawked.
“Is that not what you wanted?” He cocked a brow. “Your friends are waiting for you.”
Makatza withdrew her knife and pointed a finger between Kaz’s eyes. “We will have a rematch. First to draw blood will be named the winner. No games.”
Kaz beamed. “I’ll be waiting.”
Not one for hugs, I let Makatza wrap an arm around my shoulder and leaned my head against her. “I’ve missed you, Mak.”
“I’ve missed you too, tzuk vartu.” Little flower in her precious, native Orcish tongue. I’d always found her nickname for me endearing. I’d tried to get her to teach me the language on several occasions, but it was difficult to get my mouth to form the words—It hadn’t come as naturally as Elvish.
Kaelias and Lorian exchanged a handful of coins, and the sound made Makatza’s head snap to the two of them, straining her neck to see who’d pocketed the winnings. “Who bet against me?”
The two exchanged a look, but neither said anything to damn the other.
“Why don’t we sit down for that meal?” I attempted to distract her. “Elle, would you like to join us?”
She shook her head. “No, I won’t interrupt. I’ll meet you back in our room.”
I let her go and followed my captain and crew to their wing of the Consortium.
There was already a spread of meats, cheeses, fresh bread, and fruit laid out across the long, rectangular table in the main room.
The smell alone had my mouth watering. I hadn’t had a decent meal in days, and my stomach was suddenly aware of that fact.
We each filled our plates and cups and took a seat.
“Do you always eat like kings here?” I asked, dipping a warm piece of bread into the oil. “Was I the only one subjected to the Mages’ apparent staple diet of soup or porridge?”
“Only after we succeed in our missions.” Lorian winked.
I dropped my bread. “Wait—you found the mystery item—place—thing Alandris was looking for?”
He nodded.
“So… what was it?”
His throat bobbed, and he swallowed a large gulp of his wine. “Our instructions are to keep the name and location secret for now.”
I tugged my bottom lip between my teeth. “Of course.”
I made to stand, but Kaelias gripped my shoulder. He shook his head at me.
“Why do I feel less and less a part of this crew lately?” My throat grew tight, and I forced the feeling down, letting my anger overpower it. “I am the healer of the Phoenix Heart. When did that change?”
“It hasn’t changed,” Lorian spoke. “It will not change. So long as you desire a place on this crew, that role will be yours, Nairu. From the moment you joined my crew, I had a duty as your captain to protect you. Though you may not understand it yet, I’m fulfilling that duty.
I asked you to trust me before we left. I hope you still can. ”
“Is it because of Zaelos?”
Lorian blinked slowly, providing the answer I suspected.
“You knew?” I dug my nails into my thighs.
“Tzuk vartu,” Makatza whispered. “We do not aim to betray you. It is all to keep you safe.”
I did not draw my eyes away from Lorian. “You knew,” I repeated. We both understood it was not a question.
He took in a deep breath. “I learned of it—Zaelos—from my sister Zorinna before we set sail to find the item. She may not harbor much love for me these days, but I trust her with my life. She insisted that keeping you in the dark was the best course of action. After everything she had told me, I believed it was the right thing to do.”
“I don’t understand.” My voice was thick with all of my effort not to scream or cry.
“I couldn’t wait for you to return. I thought your return would mark the end of my entrapment here.
After that, we could go back to our life at sea.
I would resume my duties as your ship doctor, and everything would go back to the way it was.
That dream was something I was able to hold on to, despite everything going wrong here.
Now, it feels so far away I can’t even believe I once thought it could come true.
I’m being consumed by the thing inside of me, and if I fail to train this magic I never even asked for, it’s going to win.
And on top of that, I’m being hunted like some sort of monster by a council that believes it’s easier to murder me than give me the chance to reclaim my own body! ”
Lorian stood, hands slamming down onto the table. “We are going to fix this! I will not let anyone or anything harm you.”
I will not let anyone or anything harm you. A friend’s promise.
I won’t let anything happen to you. A stranger’s promise.
Don’t you dare look at me like you want to say goodbye because I am not letting you die. This was… something else? A dream? A memory?
The words echoed in my head, the sheer despair in them shaking me to my core.
For a moment, it froze me. My eyes glossed over as I attempted to grasp the fuzzy memory, to determine where and when the words had been spoken to me, and who had said them.
Each time I drew closer, my fingertips grazing the edge of the memory, it drifted further out of reach, leaving a sharp pain in its wake. Still, I pressed on.
…do not ask me not to try.
I gripped the sides of my head, sucking in short, sharp breaths. I was close. So close.
“Nairu?” Lorian called out, his voice a distant blur. “Nairu? Kaelias help her!”
I felt hands over the top of my own. The sensation was enough to rip me back to reality. The memory,—I was sure it’d been a memory—dissipated as if it’d never been there at all, and no matter what I did to try to recall it, it would not come.
“What did you do?” I pulled away from Kaelias. “I was—I had something. Something like a memory. I—I don’t know what it was, but I heard it. I was so close.”
“You looked like you were in pain,” Kaelias signed.
“I almost had it.”
Mak knelt down beside me. “We’re only trying to help you.”
“I don’t need help.” I stood, my legs shaking. “I need to go. I need to speak with Alandris. He told me to tell him if something like this happens, and I don’t know, I—I just need to speak with him.”